Rekindled Fire
by boywithbreadlover
Summary: "I can feel the shattered pieces coming together, my broken heart picking itself back up." This is the sequel to The Fate Games, It is Catching Fire in Peeta's point of view. What was Peeta thinking when he found he was going back in? Read to find out! This is purely based off the book. Any direct quotes will be in italics, since I do not own Catching Fire. Enjoy!
1. Chapter 1

**The first chapter! Okay so if you're not familiar with me, boywithbreadlover, this is the sequel to The Fate Games, which is The Hunger Games in Peeta's POV and this is Catching Fire in Peeta's POV, it's not necessary that you read The Fate Games, to read this, but it would be really awesome if you did! To all the readers that encouraged me to do this, here you go! I hope you love the first chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire so any direct quotes will be in italics!**

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**Ch. 1**

It's not easy getting out of bed each morning. It would be so simple to just lie there, almost lifeless and let people forget about me. My family wouldn't notice, Katniss wouldn't care, Haymitch might miss the bread, but would it even matter? Sometimes I wonder how it would be different if Katniss had just given into the Capitol and let me die. What if that nightlock was never found and Katniss got to go home alone? Things would definitely be simpler. I feel like I get in the way of everyone, even my family.

At least one of them stays the night at my new house in Victor's Village each night, but it's easier to just stay at the bakery, to forget about their broken family member. My mom wasn't good at comforting me when I got back, she never questioned my screams at night or my walking through the house in the middle of the night, she ignored it. And it hurt. My mom was supposed to be there for me, through thick and thin, but she acts like nothing happened. She acts as if Katniss never broke my heart and that I'm not some lost and scared victor. Marcus is the one who comforts me, he's the one that stays over most nights, and wakes up to help me from my nightmares. But I know there is only one person that can truly help me from the nightmares. Katniss.

Sometimes, if my nightmare is so convincing that Katniss died, I walk out my front door. In the middle of the night, I leave my house and stand in front of Katniss'. I point out the things that show that some one is living there, that indeed Katniss is still alive. Sometimes it takes hours to convince myself that Katniss is in there, asleep, breathing. What I really want to do is to walk right into the house, go to the room I've never seen, open up the covers and let her back into my arms. But I know she wouldn't welcome it. I know she wouldn't ever want me to do that.

We don't talk. Not after all those nights in our cave and the promises of living. She doesn't even really acknowledge me. Her eyes dart away when I try to look at her. When I deliver the bread to her house each morning she's never the one at the door. Sometimes she's back in the living room and I can see her braid or her boot, but I never see her. Prim tries to talk to me and to welcome me into their home, but I know Katniss wouldn't want that so I don't except the invitation.

"Peeta I'm headed to the bakery. I'll be back before your team gets here. Or I'll try. But you better get started on the bread for your friends." It's Marcus outside my door, waiting for me to invite him in and say goodbye. Today is the day we start our victory tour. My whole team will be here, Effie, Portia, Rake, Lucinda, Talia, all of them. I'll be back with Katniss; we'll be hopefully talking again. Maybe I can at least get her to be my friend if she doesn't want to be my love.

"Come on in. I was awake anyways." Marcus opens the door quickly and is also quick to plop down on my bed.

"Are you ready?" He asks, running his hand through his hair something he started doing since I got home.

"Not exactly. I don't know how Katniss will react." Will she even talk to me?

"I'm sure she'll be nice enough. You've just got to use that Mellark charm. Listen, I'd love to talk more, but I'll be back soon. Dad just needs me today. I'll be back before you leave. I promise." He hugs me and rushes out the door down the stairs and I hear the door slams as he leaves me completely alone. Right now all I want to do is paint. It relieves a lot of tension, but I know I need to be ready faster. I usually take bread to Haymitch and the Everdeen's each morning. I make the bread here; I only go to work at the bakery once a week. A lot of people react when they see me working, I guess I'm just supposed to do nothing. It would be nice to just paint all day, all my fears, and my worries, disappear into the painting. I paint whatever came to haunt me in my nightmares the night before. Usually moments from the arena. But it helps to just let it out of my mind and on the canvas, and even though it's permanently on the canvas, it seems to disappear from my mind.

Today I can't paint. I have to bake; I don't have a lot of time today. I get to work on the dough. Baking also helps, but not as much. I take my frustrations out in baking; I let my fears slip away while painting. They both do different things. Right now, I think I need both, I'm so frustrated that Katniss won't talk to me, but I'm so scared that she'll never actually talk to me again.

It's easy and freeing kneading the dough, hitting it against the table, letting all of the things I hate about right now fade to the back of my head. My life has not been easy in the last couple months. After the cameras left and District Twelve was back to normal Katniss left, my family didn't appear as much, and Haymitch became a full time drunk. Haymitch still talked to me, we still had a pretty good relationship, but he just wasn't enough. I needed her to hold my hand, to tell me everything was going to be okay. Not Marcus or Haymitch, but Katniss. I try to remind myself that she did have to feel something. The way her lips worked against mine was just so perfect. All those nights in the cave weren't nothing. They couldn't be.

Some moments I feel like going insane.

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**I hope you liked it! If we're lucky the next chapter(s) will be up tomorrow, but it's my first day of school so don't get your hopes up. Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	2. Chapter 2

**Here's the next chapter! I'm sorry it took so long to post! So if you haven't read The Fate Games, I talk about a conversation between Haymitch and Peeta in this chapter that was in The Fate Games, so if you were wondering, now you know :) Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire so any direct quotes will be in italics. **

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**Ch. 2**

I'm almost done baking when I hear a steady knocking on the door. I have a small moment of confusion where I just stand in the kitchen my hands covering my head. It's as if I've forgotten how to answer the door. I'm almost certain that when I open that door there will be Effie, her bright smile making my depressing day, still depressing, but maybe just a little bit better. I still don't want to open it because then after her will come cameras, my prep team, and so many things that I don't like. There will be Portia maybe she'll keep me sane. I will also get to spend time with Katniss.

I know we have to keep up the act. Haymitch only mentioned part of his demons to me on the train, but from the little he told me I knew the Capitol could do horrible things. Even to their sacred victors. I'm not sure I know all that he lost. Was it just a hard working mother, or was it six brothers and sisters, forever gone because he somehow upset the Capitol. Did he have a love; some one who held his hand each night, that one night just wasn't there anymore? I don't know, but from his expressionless face, I also found pain I'm sure he didn't want me to see. He never mentioned it again, and I never asked. I know he told me out of necessity and not want.

I look at the clock. It's hours before they have to come. It can't be them, unless they're early, which I know they wouldn't be. Effie is always on time, never early and certainly never late. It can't be them, but if it isn't then who? I open my door slowly as I think of all the limited possibilities. It is Delly Cartwright, a childhood friend who stopped by from time to time. She was the only person I really talked from my before the Games people. Really my social group was limited to Haymitch, Marcus, and Delly, who only showed up to surprise me. Her bright smiling face actually makes a small smile cross my face. It was nice to keep some one from my past; it kept me sane.

"Hi Peeta!" She thrusts a bag into my hand. Whatever it was it smelt good. "I can't believe you leave on the Victory Tour today! I'm going to miss Katniss and you so much!" I knew Delly never talked to Katniss. Maybe Delly tried to smile at her in the market, but I doubt she ever got more than a little eye contact. "Oh, it smells so good in here!" She freely walks around my almost empty house. My mother never moved a lot of stuff in to this house, only the things that were taking up too much space in our small home.

"Good morning Delly, I have an extra loaf if you'd like one." We make our way into the very sizable kitchen where the fumes had originated.

"Oh, no. I already bought a loaf from your father." She brings up another bag that I had not seen earlier and waved it around.

I realize the bag she had handed me held one of my father's many creations. "Delly you didn't have to bring me this." I try to hand it back to her, but she doesn't take it.

"Oh no Peeta, Marcus wanted me to give that to you. He said he wouldn't be able to make it back. Apparently they're busy today. Don't worry I didn't pay for it." Delly wasn't poor. She wasn't anywhere near to the Seam. She had a little pudge that anyone in District Twelve would be happy to have. She had enough money, but I didn't like people to spend money on me when I had too much as it is. The people that are frequent customers to the bakery have certainly noticed; the prices have gone way down. My parents never struggle and the family dinners that I do go to the day-old bread isn't served.

"He put a note in it. You can wait until I leave to open it." Delly doesn't like difficult subjects. It was always optimistic subjects whenever she came to visit. The Games were never mentioned. I'm not sure she even watched them. She used to ask me about Katniss, but when she realized it was a hard subject she steered clear. Right now her eyes are on the floor, observing it like it was the most complicated piece of art. This wasn't even a hard subject; just the probability that something on that card was hard was high. She didn't want anything sad to ruin her happy visit.

"I'll wait." I set the bag down on the counter and move to the oven to remove the perfect bread. "Delly you know if you ever need bread, I can give it to you. Just come over here. I almost always have an extra loaf."

"Oh, no, it gives me a reason to come into town. And besides I like to see your father. He's nice. Marcus and Rhys are too. I don't usually see your mother." She says. My mom is usually in the back, making more things, or frosting cakes; whatever she was doing she just didn't like to talk to people. She especially didn't like to be asked about me. Which was now more frequent.

"Well, if you ever want to see me. I'll have bread." I say and lean against the back of the counter. I had set the bread out to cool. The fumes had become stronger.

"Of course I love to see you! I just like to keep you on your feet. I like to surprise you!" She basically jumps and comes over to hug me. I accept it, but I don't like to get smothered too much. "Well, Peeta, I sure will miss you, but my mother didn't want me out too long. I have to walk the dog. I'll see you when you get back! And I'll watch you on T.V!" We say our goodbyes and she's gone. I get back quickly to the kitchen and open up the bag from Marcus. It's a goat-cheese apple tart. A pastry I had told Katniss about while in the cave. The note had Marcus' messy writing:

You have enough money now! Now all you have to do is win her heart! I will miss you and good luck. I know she loves you! ~Marcus

Marcus and I had, had many talks about Katniss. He had told me that he had saw true feelings in her eyes. Some days I believe him and sometimes I just don't. But most days I want to.

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**I hope you liked it! Okay so I told you guys I wouldn't be able to post as much, but I'm sorry! I didn't know this week would be as busy as it was! On The Fate Games, I tried to update everyday, sometimes twice a day, but unfortunately since school has begun I can't do that anymore :(. So don't expect anymore updates than 3-4 during the weekdays. During the weekends I will try to update 2-3 times a day because I hate to keep you waiting! To all my readers that went from The Fate Games to this, I want to say Thank-you again, because you guys are awesome for reading this and reviewing! To all my new readers you guys are awesome too! On that note, don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	3. Chapter 3

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire so any direct quotes will be in italics. **

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**Ch. 3**

It has been a process getting my fake leg to appear real. The first couple months it was so obvious that something was wrong. I had abandoned the cane with in a week of getting home because I was just plain tired of it. People tired to help me at first, but I just waved them away. I did not want to depend on anyone. If Katniss wasn't there to help me then no one really could.

Now on the short trip to Haymitch's house the steps come easy. They are no hard thoughts about it or looks of pain. I moved faster now, and if no one had known of my lost leg they never would have questioned it.

I can hear bickering before I even go in. It's Katniss, surely gone in to wake up our easily angered mentor. I walk in with out a knock. It's something that I don't even think about. I used to, but I soon realized Haymitch didn't care and he certainly would not get up to answer the door. "_Look, if you wanted to be babied, you should have asked Peeta." _Katniss' voice is full of anxiety, I know she tries to pass it off with anger, but I know she's as nervous about the cameras as I am.

"_Asked me what?"_ I call out into the cluttered house. I walk into the room to find Haymitch soaked, and Katniss in a position that makes her look like a parent scolding a child. We all know she's the one that dumped the water on his head. It's so her.

"_Asked you to wake me without giving me pneumonia," _Haymitch hand me his knife when I hold my hand out for it to cut the freshly baked bread. Haymitch takes off his shirt and begins to dry himself. He looks disheveled and lost. It's comical. I don't laugh, but I do smile. Haymitch looks like a seven year-old, Katniss the angry mother. It perfectly describes their relationship.

I clean the knife in a bottle of white liquor that was rolling around on the floor. I cut the soft bread, steadily making sure to make a clean straight cut. It may not be that important, but I have perfected it. I don't think much of Katniss' presence until I realize I should say something to her. If I could I would pour my whole heart out, but I know Katniss would run away and hide from the scary things that have been haunting me. Instead, we don't talk, well at least she doesn't, but I don't go out of my way either. I don't want to make her feel uncomfortable at any cost. If space is what she needs space is what I'll give her. I just wish she wanted no space between us at all.

There's an awkward silence as I hand Haymitch his slice. It would come off rude if I didn't say anything. I should at least ask her. I'm just scared of her response, "_Would you like a piece?"_ It's such a simple question, but I haven't been able to look Katniss in the face like this for weeks. It's nice to be able to look into her grey eyes that brighten up even Haymitch's dark house. But it is only a second that her eyes hold before they look elsewhere.

"_No, I ate at the Hob, but thank you." _Her words aren't natural, instead they sound like something she's been practicing in front of the mirror for months. She doesn't feel comfortable.

"_You're welcome," _I say to her in the exact same tone. She had set it and I had followed. Maybe it is partially my fault we don't talk, maybe if I tried…

_"Brrr. You two have got a lot of warming up to do before showtime." _I hate how he says that. Showtime. Really it is for Katniss, but for me it's natural. Well, at least somewhat. At least there is real love.

"_Take a bath, Haymitch." _Katniss is gone too fast, before I can try to lighten the mood, or say something nice, she avoids problems. Kind of like Delly, except Katniss actually has real challenges to face.

"She's right." Haymitch says, but he doesn't get up to take the bath. Instead he takes one big bite into the bread and smiles. "You'll be better this afternoon right?"

"What do you mean?"

"You guys, you'll be in love. Right? I mean the Capitol is still mad at you, I can just feel it." Haymitch's words chill me. I know the Capitol put him through something, the loss of his family I'm assuming. He knows what they do. He knows and I know that I don't know their full potential. His words are simple. We have to be in love.

"Yeah. Star-crossed Lovers of District Twelve. I'm just worried about her. She doesn't seem like she'll be up for it." The last look she gave Haymitch before she left was so full of worry, and just plain anger. Why did she have to be stuck with me?

"She's right along with you. Don't worry. One bit." Haymitch begins to cut another piece. The edges will be rough, but he probably doesn't want to spread anything on it.

"I hope so." I move to leave, but Haymitch puts his hand on my shoulder.

"You still love her don't you?" He looks right into my eyes, looking for any doubt that I don't love her.

"I will never stop." I shake his hand off and with that I'm gone. My words are true, so true. How could one ever stop loving the girl they've loved for almost as long as they can remember? Katniss is so many things to me. The girl with two braids in kindergarten, the Seam girl who was just so perfect for me, the girl that struggled for her life each and every day and was just plain beautiful. I will never forget the nights in our cave. Her head up against my chest my arms wrapped around her small frame. I'll never forget the girl that brought me back to life, or the girl who made my heart stop every time she kissed me. Katniss was in every sense my everything. There was no me without loving Katniss.

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**I hope you liked it! So I posted the 2nd chapter last night, but I realized it wasn't showing up on here! So I had to re-post it! Yeah, I'm sure you wanted to know that :) I wore my Mockingjay shirt today! I love this shirt! Anyways, Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	4. Chapter 4

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire so any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 4**

Before I go back to my house I stop at the Everdeen's. I know Katniss won't be opening the door. She never does. I just hope that maybe, since in only a couple hours from now we'll have to be in love, that'll she'll see it's me and come to the door. I know it's too much to wish for. I can talk to her on the train.

"Hi, Peeta." Mrs. Everdeen opens the door, lines of worry cross her face. She never really looks happy, but right now she looks even more worried than usual.

"Is everything okay?" I say as I hand her the still warm bread.

"Yes, everything's fine. I'm just sad you and Katniss will be leaving again. At least you won't be gone too long." She puts her hand onto her forehead and sighs, letting some of the tension between us leave.

I know I told myself to talk to Katniss on the train, but I have this strong want to just talk to her now. To hug her, and kiss her, and caress her face. And if I can't get any of that, I at least want a real conversation, "Can I talk to Katniss?" I say, peering into the living room. Katniss is nowhere to be seen.

"Umm…" She pauses, at a loss for words, " She is taking a bath right now. She decided to get a jump-start on her prep team. You can talk to her later. After the prep-team and all that. I think that'd be best." Mrs. Everdeen goes to close the door before I can say anything else, "Bye, Peeta." The door shuts and I hear as she walks away into farther into the house. I stand at the door for a minute. Maybe I can just wait until Katniss is out of the bath, maybe then we can talk. But I know time is ticking away. My prep team will be here soon. I decide to go back home, and take a bath just like Katniss.

At least then I won't have to be with my prep team as long.

They come into my room quietly at first. I didn't even know anybody had walked into my house, but then I hear them. I turn around and see the all to familiar faces of my prep team.

"Peeta! I haven't seen you in so long! I can't wait to see your paintings!" Lucinda squeaks and runs over to where I'm sitting on my bed. All I have is a robe on, but I know that's what they would put me in anyways. She grabs me and hugs me a little too tight.

"Peeta! Come over here!" Talia holds out her hands and is only three feet away from me, but I can't reach her. My fake leg isn't on.

"Sorry, Talia I can't." I gesture towards my stumps and her eyes go huge.

"Oh my goodness Peeta! I'm so sorry! How could I forget?" She comes over to me and does the same thing Lucinda did. It again was too tight. Rake comes and hugs me too, but it isn't as tight and excited.

"We missed you so much!" Squeals Talia. They begin to get to work on me. After the questions and fake answers they start to talk about themselves and things in the Capitol. I begin to tune out their high-pitched voices as their hands work some sort of magic on me.

It's not soon enough when Portia comes in and tells them to leave. But when she comes I am so glad. She hugs me too, but not too tight, it was perfect. She had helped me work the leg on, that still hurt when left on to long, but I've begun to get used to it. I even sleep with it most nights now. I tend to like to wander a lot at night and I can't do that without a leg.

"So, Peeta how have you been?" I've gotten the occasional letter from Portia. I usually don't tell her too much in them. I'm not sure if the Capitol screens them or not. But right now I just want to pour my whole heart out to her. I know I can't there are cameras being set up down in my living room, not even fifty steps away, they can't know of the pain Katniss has caused me.

"It's been hard." Is all I say. I know she'll get it. She has to see the heartache in my face.

"I bet it has. I've seen some of your paintings. They're beautiful. So deep. You really have a good hand. Katniss was right when she said you were born with it." Her comment throws me back into the Games. A conversation we had only hours before the mutts appeared. I forget it was broadcasted to all of Panem. I forget that all those moments shared with Katniss, were also shared with the non-forgetting minds of the Capitol.

"It's really helped me." She begins to help me into my outfit. There's snow outside, so I dress warm. The clothes are nice and fit perfectly to my body.

"The cameras are ready!" Effie flies into my room. I can't believe that I actually kind of missed her. I want to hug her, but I know that isn't fit into her schedule so instead I just follow her down the stairs. "Now, you prepared for this right?" She asks, and I see a ton of my paintings set up through my living room. I was called earlier this week and told to pick out the ones I had wanted to take with me to the Capitol. I decided to bring the ones that didn't have meaning, the ones that didn't leave me staring at them for hours, wondering how my mind could create such a powerful masterpiece. I picked the simple ones, the ones the Capitol people would actually be able to understand.

When I first started to write out what I would say for this, the words I had written would never be able to be broadcasted. Victors were supposed to be happy, not tortured. The first words that came to mind were: The last few months have been really hard. With Katniss not here to keep me together I've begun to fall apart. The only thing that keeps me here and breathing is painting. It releases all my fears and let's me empty them out onto a canvas. In a way, it's kept me sane.

When I had stopped and read it over, I realized this would never work. So in the end I went with a bunch of fake words. None really true.

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**I hope you liked it! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	5. Chapter 5

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire so any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 5**

Silence cuts through in the last moments before I step out my door. Before I'm back to the Star-crossed Lovers from District Twelve. Behind all the smiling and happiness and love that Katniss and I have created—although true on my part—is deep pain that has rooted itself in my heart for the last couple months. The Capitol won't be able to tell that when Katniss whispers something in my ear, it isn't out of affection, but necessity. They won't understand the endless nightmares I've had or the endless paintings I have hidden in a closet somewhere or an empty room that show my pain in perfect detail. All they will see is love. They won't see lies and deception, but innocent love.

"Alright Peeta, it's time." A cameraman I've never seen before tries to push me forward. Effie had left to help Katniss, since in her words I was perfectly fine by myself. Before she had left she had yelled at the whole crew to keep us on schedule or else. Whatever the or else entailed it really scared them because they were desperate to get me out there. I was ready, or least I tried to tell myself. I was ready for this. Being comfortable with Katniss wasn't hard, it came natural, or at least it used to. "Come on Peeta," The cameraman nudges me again and this time I obey. The door flings right open, it seems someone had opened it for me, and all I have to do is walk forward, down a couple steps and out front. It seemed easy, but it also was the beginning of another hard journey. A journey that could be filled easily with pain, or maybe if I looked at it differently it didn't have to be so painful. Maybe if I didn't try to just think about what Katniss did to me and think about what it has done to her as well. Maybe we don't have to be lovers. Maybe we could just be friends.

Of course we'd have to be friends away from the cameras. I see her, her face no longer etched with anger that was there this morning. No, for just a second there is fear, but I don't think about it that much because after that one second ends happiness come across her face. Her pace quickens as she comes closer and closer to me, pretty soon she's running and she is in my arms again. I spin her around, but I forget how uncoordinated I can be with this leg if I'm doing anything other than walking. We slip and fall and our lips meet. And although it's been months of endless pain and agony because I'm lost with out this girl by me, I'm instantly full again. I can feel the shattered pieces coming together, my broken heart picking itself back up. I know she isn't totally sincere, but Marcus was right, there is something there. I feel it. She has to feel it. The way our lips work together it's just so… Perfect. It makes me full of life, happy, joyful, not broken.

The rest of the day is a lot of the same. There were cameras and big smiles and tearful goodbyes. But nothing really caught my attention except for Katniss who was by my side the whole entire day. If we weren't holding hands we were kissing, if we weren't kissing we were laughing together, it just seemed so natural and not at all forced.

My parents came to the train to say goodbye, something I was not at expecting. My mom had just hugged me and my dad had just patted me on the back, but it gave me something. The past few months I have been lost, and with out my family there to help me figure it out I've been even more lost. My mom wasn't there to tell me to be strong or my dad wasn't there to just look me in the eye and somehow tell me everything was going to be okay. It broke me even more. Having Marcus was nice, but it would've been even better if I could live with my whole family all the time. They offered for me to live at the bakery with them, but I wanted to be close to Katniss. If she was ever in danger I wanted to be there to help her. With that decision my family retreated, except for Marcus who has thankfully stayed by my side. But the small gesture of coming to say goodbye made my day even better. It reminded me that they still loved me.

"I can't believe we get to go to District Four during this time of year, it is so lovely there. Peeta, and you too Katniss, you guys will love it. It is absolutely gorgeous." Effie gushes later that night as we eat a huge meal comprised of many things.

"Yeah, I can't wait." I say with no real enthusiasm, but I don't think Effie listens to my tone of voice.

"Really? I've always wanted to visit the outer Districts. I thought Twelve was absolutely breathtaking today." Says Portia biting into a piece of bread, which reminds me that I was going to give her one of my own loafs. It's one of the few things we could talk about in letters. My baking skills.

"Oh no, you've never been to Four? Well One is beautiful too, but I've always found something amazing about the water." Says Effie, clearly not happy that anyone would find District Twelve a place of beauty.

"No this is the first time I'll be going to any of the Districts. I am very excited. Although, I was most excited for today. Peeta told me about the secret beauty." Effie acts like she didn't hear it and goes onto another subject. Effie has never seen it as any sort of beauty, but now that I've started painting I see it everywhere.

Sometimes when I don't want to paint my fears, and just want to paint something beautiful I look out my window and I instantly find it. In the sunset or in the way the tree's shadows fall across the ground, or on the eerie fall mornings. I could find it anywhere. District Twelve could be beautiful all you had to do was look for it.

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**I hope you liked it! Did you here they start shooting on tuesday for Catching Fire? Crazy, right? I wish I lived near the set so I could go meet the cast or something, but I don't so that's sad. Have any of you ever seen or met any of the cast before? Just wondering... Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks ~boywithbreadlover**


	6. Chapter 6

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire so any direct quotes will be in italics, except for the first two words of this chapter they are not taken from the book.**

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**Ch. 6**

_ Click, click. _A stern lady sits in front of me; she keeps on clicking her pin. She doesn't say anything, but I can feel in my stomach that isn't a good thing. Her eyebrow is slightly raised, her face completely un-phased. Suddenly my dream goes to something else.

"Peeta, I can't go, just leave." Katniss looks at me, she's drenched in sweat. She's down on her knees the forest of the Arena surrounds us. I don't see it until I look closer, but her leg is not only drenched in sweat, but blood as well.

"No, Katniss. I'm not leaving you. Not after what they've already done to us." I'm assuming I'm talking about the Capitol that usually is the enemy in my nightmares. I walk closer to her and kneel down beside her. I don't do anything except just sit. I don't try to help her or anything; I'm waiting, for something.

"They'll send them out any time now. Peeta you need to go." Katniss' words are calm, no fear laces them at all, but her face explains it all. Before I can say or do anything else I'm back in the room, I can here the steady clicking again.

"So you don't know what happened after Katniss told you to leave?" Her words are the same as her face, un-phased. I search for any memory of what comes after that, but none comes. I shake my head. "When you said 'Not after what they've done to us,' who was the they?" She continues to click the pin and it fills the room.

"Is Katniss okay?" I avoid the question; I know if I answer it truthfully they won't like it.

"No she died." Her words aren't at all soothing. They don't have any comfort in them. My mind instantly goes into overdrive and I try to remember just how I lost Katniss this time. It takes a while before the un-real memory comes.

"Peeta go!" A giant claw grabs me from the ground pulling me away from Katniss and into a hovercraft.

"Let me go!" I scream up towards it. The claw pauses ten feet above the ground and just like that the wolf mutts appear. The cannon sounds with in seconds. Katniss is gone.

I wake up fast not wanting the nightmare to go any farther into that. I can't take it. I need to paint. I know it's early in the morning, but there has to be a Capitol attendant still awake. I walk out to go find one; I need to paint. It doesn't take long to find a Capitol attendant, but she doesn't look very happy to be awake at this hour.

"Hi," I wake her from a daze, her eyes weren't closed, but I don't think she was totally there. Her eyes go wide when she sees it's me, a victor, needing her assistance in the middle of the night. "I brought some extra canvases and paint, do you know where they're holding my paintings?"

"Mr. Mellark, I think it's better that you go to bed now." Her words seem practiced and computerized, not at all human.

"That's the thing I can't sleep. I need to paint to do that." She looks confused for a second, but then goes to a phone for a second. Her words are hushed and fast and I can't understand them with her accent, but she finally finds out where they are held.

"Follow me." She begins to walk, but then suddenly stops and turns around, " We have sleeping pills if that's what you need." I had never used them, but I don't think I wanted them. I shake my head to decline and she turns around and keeps walking. "Right here. Do you need any further assistance?" She opens the door to the car holding all my paintings. I shake my head. She's gone with in seconds. It only takes a minute to find the empty canvases, the jars of paint, and well-crafted brushes. I'm out of the dark room filled with my nightmares as fast as I can. I know what I want to paint. The wolves looking up at me, Katniss' body beneath them. I will exclude Katniss' body, if any one else sees that they might get worried.

I find a simple rhythm back in my room. Dip, paint, dip, paint. My hand finds it's comfortable stroke. The details come alive, even the scary eyes of the forgotten tributes embedded in the mutts are not forgotten. Once I paint it, it seems to be out of my mind.

I'm done with it by early afternoon. I let it dry and try to find a place to hide it. The best I can come up with is under my bed. I doubt they check there that often, and if they do, maybe they won't tell anyone about it, maybe they'll keep it to themselves. Just as I was getting up from putting under my bed I hear the door open.

"Peeta, are you ready for lunch?" Effie comes in. I look at my clothes, the same clothes I had on yesterday. Probably not presentable.

"Do I have time for a shower?" Effie looks at her watch and frowns a little.

"Well, I suppose, Katniss is going to be a little late as well. Just… be quick." With that she's out of my room. I listen to her words and get ready quick, I'm out to the table with a record time of ten minutes. Katniss isn't there yet, but everyone else is. We begin on the food with out her and by the time she gets to the table she doesn't look all to well. We try to include her in our conversations, but she isn't very talkative.

Later into the meal we learn that our train has had a malfunction and that we will be delayed at least an hour. As soon as the server that tells us leaves Effie becomes very upset. "No! No, no, no, no, no!" She pulls out the schedule and begins to tell us how the whole rest of the trip will be horrible. How our lives will basically be ruined. No one in the room really wants to listen to it, but we do.

Until Katniss finally gets fed up with it, "_No one cares, Effie!" _She screams exactly what everyone was thinking, but no one had the nerve to say. We all stare at her in shock. I'm wondering why she's so upset. Or maybe I'm just calm because I got to paint. "_Well, no one does." _Katniss is up fast and out of the train even faster. We all hear the door slam and sit in silence for only a moment.

"What was she thinking?" Effie goes into another rant.

I think back to the night Katniss shot an arrow at the Gamemakers, how I so badly wanted to comfort her, but I knew I couldn't. Maybe now I can, maybe now she'll let me. I need to be her friend. This can be a start. So with out asking to be excused I leave and take the same path Katniss did out the door. It was time to mend both of our wounds.

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**I hope you liked it! This will probably be my last chapter for today, so as we go into the week, don't expect anymore than 3-4 updates, which I'm really sorry about :( I will also be gone next weekend, I feel bad I won't be able to update :( I hope you guys will still like me :) Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	7. Chapter 7

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own CF so any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 7**

"_I'm not in the mood for a lecture." _Katniss is sitting with her back facing the train. Her braid falls across her back and I can see the tenseness in her muscles. I don't think she expect it to be me.

"_I'll try to keep it brief." _I sit down next to her. I'm waiting for her to reject me, like she would back home, but she doesn't.

"_I thought you were Haymitch." _She shifts her weight slightly away from me, but she doesn't completely cut me out. We would have to talk sometime, I guess now is the time.

"_No, he's still working on that muffin," _Haymitch was hung-over today nibbling on little bits of a muffin. I finally get comfortable with my fake leg and turn towards her. No tears stain her cheeks, but I can tell she's only moments away. "_Bad day, huh?"_ I take into consideration how horrible my day would be with out painting. I can usually only go one day with out a paint brush in my hand, I tend to get depressed if I don't. Maybe hunting is what releases those fears from Katniss, maybe that's all she needs. But maybe I can be the next best thing. Maybe she can let all her fear flow out of her mouth and into my ears, and maybe then they'll be gone. It probably wouldn't be as just like hunting, but it might be just enough. I know it would have an amazing effect on me.

"_It's nothing,"_ She doesn't accept my invitation, I didn't really expect her too. Maybe she needs to know that I don't want to feel bad for myself anymore. I want her to be my friend and if that leads to somewhere else, well let's just say I wouldn't mind it. But right now, I can see it, she needs a friend.

"_Look, Katniss," _It needs to start with an apology, maybe I hurt her too much. I shouldn't have been mad at her. I should have seen it, "_I've been wanting to talk to you about the way I acted on the train. I mean, the last train. The one that brought us home. I knew you had something with Gale. I was jealous of him before I even officially met you. And it wasn't fair to hold you to anything that happened in the Games," _I let the next words fall out easily, I mean them, "_I'm sorry." _

I've thought about it endlessly. On one side, there had to be something there, but when we got home she went right back to Gale. I know she denies to be anything there, the Capitol says they're cousins, but I know there is. You can't be that close to some one of the opposite sex and not feel at least a little something. I'd get if they had a relationship like siblings, but they don't. Of the little interactions I saw of them before the Games, I could see he at least felt something. I knew she had to too. But then there's all those hours in the cave, the moments of complete vulnerability. You don't have all that and have nothing form. It confused me so much, to no end, but in the end it all came down to what Katniss was thinking. And to Katniss it was all for the Games.

We sit in silence for a minute, letting the wind whistle across the tracks. The air making my words seem farther and farther away. Then finally Katniss lets out words I'd never expect her to say, "_I'm sorry, too." _She doesn't explain the meaning behind them or even why they slipped out of her mouth. I'm not sure she knows the exact reason why she either.

_"There's nothing for you to be sorry about. You were just keeping us alive,"_ How was she supposed to know that I wasn't acting? "_But I don't want us to go on like this, ignoring each other in real life and falling into the snow every time there's a camera around," _It would be in every way too painful. I could not handle it, even if I did have a paint brush in my hand, "_So I thought if I stopped being so, you know, wounded, we could take a shot at just being friends,"_ I could handle that, I couldn't handle the ignoring.

"_Okay," _That one word doesn't totally convince me that, that this is what she wants, but it's enough. She must need it too. At least just a little bit. Now that we can be friends, maybe she'll be comfortable.

"_So, what's wrong?"_ She doesn't answer, she turns her head away and pulls out a weed. We aren't to that point yet. We need to start off with something else, something not so painful. Because if I was asked that question, the list would go on and on, I'm not sure it would ever stop. "_Let's start with something more basic."_ We don't know simple things about each other, only the base of each other's fears. "_Isn't it strange that I know you'd risk your life to save mine… but I don't know what your favorite color is?" _

"_Green," _The tension of having to tell me what's wrong is gone, "_What's yours?" _

I have been introduced to so many different colors since I've started painting, but it's easy what my favorite is, "_Orange."_

"_Orange? Like Effie's hair?" _I think of the bright orange color Effie now has atop her head. My favorite color was nowhere close to that shade.

"_A bit more muted," _I try to think of what the color inside my head compares to, "_More like… sunset." _Since I've gotten home I've appreciated the moments inbetween day and night, so perfect, yet so eerily strange.

"_You know everyone's been raving about your paintings. I feel bad I haven't seen them." _I think over all the paintings I didn't bring, how perfectly they would describe these past months. How perfectly Katniss would understand how broken I am. But at least I did bring some, they won't explain completely, but they will, just a little.

"_Well, I've got a whole train car full."_ I stand, offering out my hand, like any good friend would do, "_Come on." _Katniss' hand does more than she'll ever understand.

"_I've got to apologize to Effie first." _

_ "Don't be afraid to lay it on thick." _And so we go, two broken victors trying to hold each other together.

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**I hope you liked it! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	8. Chapter 8

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics. **

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**Ch. 8**

When I paint, I don't usually paint the scariest part of my dream, like I did last night, unless I have to. Usually painting anything from the dream will relieve my tension, but some days, when the nightmares seem so real and the deaths I witnessed I'm sure are true, I paint the scariest of my dream. The one last night was rare, the mutts only came every so often, coming only when I feel everything will be all right, and then they stop my mind from thinking that. It's always different situations with them, at the cornucopia, or in our cave, or even Thresh's land of the arena. But one things sure, when I do dream of them, I have to paint them. I did bring one, but the rest of those paintings are back home, somewhere in special closet I've started calling the nightmare. No one in the Capitol would like those paintings, they reveal my broken soul.

When I bring Katniss into the car packed full of my painting, each one signifying a certain nightmare, her face doesn't fill with awe like everyone else's does. No matter what I dream of it's always in the arena. The paintings all through the car don't seem to be full of nightmares, but to Katniss and I, lost and broken victors, they are deathly. They bring back endless memories, some of which I'd like to forget. There's one back in the corner of the car, it was one of my firsts, it is of my view of the tree that had the tracker jacker nest. The detail is painted perfectly, Katniss' boot hanging off one of the high off branches, the careers' fire making light patterns across the trunk. My mind would not let me forget anything, even in sleep. Katniss is detailed in almost every painting only because she's in each and every one of my nightmares; they never do end well for either of us.

I watch as Katniss face becomes more and more scrunched, her muscles tensing almost instantly. "_What do you think?" _I say after I let her take in all of the paintings, even the small unimportant ones, the ones where the sun breaks through our cave.

"_I hate them," _I should have expected this from her, but somehow I didn't. Everyone that sees them always gushes at how good I am, how the strokes are perfect. But Katniss doesn't and I know exactly why, they're her nightmares as well. _"All I do is go around trying to forget the arena and you've brought it back to life. How do you remember them exactly?"_ The brain is strange, it holds things in and then shows them to you, only to make you scared. It must be a natural response to something like the Hunger Games, but why can't it just hold them back?

"_I see them every night." _I'd like to be able to say that some nights I have good dreams again, the ones I used to escape to my sleep for, but they don't come. At all.

"_Me too. Does it help? To paint them out?" _She stands in front of me waiting for advice that I can't give. Painting helps temporarily, but not long enough, never long enough.

_ "I don't know,"_ some nights I get five hours of sleep before they set in, others only twenty minutes, but overall I've begun to sleep at least a little bit more, "_I think I'm a little less afraid of going to sleep at night, or I tell myself I am, but they haven't gone anywhere." _Maybe if I had you, I want to say, but we just became friends. I can't fight to be hers again, if I ever even was, but if I can have at least a friendship, maybe the nightmares will begin to dwindle.

"_Maybe they won't," _Katniss' words at first don't sound full of fear, but listening harder I can hear it. No one wants to have a fear of sleep for the rest of their lives. "_Haymitch's haven't." _What she says is true, the knife held in his hand all night long is to protect him from what ever goes on inside his head, not from the dangers outside, like he had told me.

"_No. But for me, it's better to wake up with a paintbrush than a knife in my hand," _What if I had chosen the Haymitch route? A bottle of liquor each night, probably more, and even in that state of drunkenness still fears meet him. If alcohol can't take it away, then what really can? I don't want my life to be lived out like that, full of nothing. At least with my painting something comes out of it, with Haymitch being drunk all the time all it does is cause him more harm. "_So you really hate them?" _It did hurt. Katniss' approval was really all I wanted, for her to understand, for her to get it. But what did she mean by hate?

"_Yes," _She must hate them like I do, with an understanding, "_But they're extraordinary. Really." _That's not what I wanted, for her to tell me that they were good. I've heard that a thousand times. I wanted her to look at them and understand all the pain I've felt in the past months. I wanted her to notice that it has been hard for the both of us. But she had to know that, you don't come out of the Hunger Games and not be broken. I think it's impossible. Even all those careers whom have won all those years, I'm sure they aren't one hundred percent fine. They never could be, not if they went through anything remotely close to what I went through.

"_Want to see my talent?" _I try to search my brain for anything Katniss could have been doing that was Capitol approved. Did she bring a bag of game? "_Cinna did a great job on it." _Now I remember, I had heard the camera crew taking about Katniss' fine hand at making clothes. I guess I hadn't really registered it being strange.

I let out a rare laugh that really only Katniss can bring out of me, "_Later," _The train lurches forward as we begin to move again. We must be getting close to our first stop on the Victory Tour. District Eleven.

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**I hope you liked it! Oh goodness, I feel really bad I can't update as often as I did on The Fate Games, as I begin to get into a routine it will probably get updated sooner, because I feel bad. Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	9. Chapter 9

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire so any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 9**

District Eleven is huge, spanning miles and miles across the land. District Twelve is nowhere near the size of it. At home everyone pretty much knows everyone, but here in this land that seems to stretch on forever, I doubt you know everyone. Then as we get closer to the heart of the District, watch towers pop up everywhere. Tall and intimidating, they seem so out of place in the innocent land. Fences guard the land, and the threat of electrification I'm sure is there, unlike back home.

We zoom by all the people working in the fields. I wonder how they feel, having to do all this hard labor just so the Capitol people can have crops. The people working don't look well fed, they look strong, but I doubt they have a full meal each night. I know why they have the fields so heavily guarded, people might steal. I wouldn't care if they stole, really the Capitol doesn't need every last piece, but in the Peacekeepers eyes, these people don't deserve a piece of fruit. They don't deserve the crops they have worked so hard on. Only the Capitol deserves it. Not these dirty filthy people.

When I see them, I see them as the most deserving people ever. They work hard all day and go home to nothing more than a small measly meal that in the end doesn't suffice at all. I wonder how many kids go hungry at night here. "_How many people do you think live here?" _I ask seeing the land keep on stretching before us, the crops going on forever and ever. Katniss just shakes her head not sure of the answer. There could be millions. I think of how really here, the chances must be low to be picked to go into the Games. But then there's the tesserea, I'm sure many kids are entered more than they are supposed to be here. I'm sure they live in fear of having to go in. I wonder what Rue thought as she took the tesserea out for her family? Did she even think twice about it?

Effie tells us what we are going to be doing today. We have to give speeches to every district on this tour. The Capitol has already written part it for us, just a robotic thank-you, no real emotion, which is what we should be giving them. Two of their own have died. The last thing they want is the kids that actually did live to come in and tell them thank-you. That won't mend their mourning hearts; make them feel better that their children died. That's why they let us add our own part, if we had alliances with either of the forgotten tributes. I know Katniss loved Rue, so I wrote my own part. If Katniss didn't have Rue for just that little bit, would she have come for me?

As it turns out, Katniss couldn't come up with anything, but from what I've written it seems to be enough. I know it's not though, I want to be able to help them in some way, and I see this poverty by just zooming by the fields, I know they need money. Which now, since I'm a victor I have a never-ending supply of. I can help them. I will help them. Nobody can stop me.

We stop and there is no chaos at the train station like there was when we came back home from the Games, instead there are eight peacekeepers who drag us into a car and take us to the place where our speech will take place. Katniss looks even more beautiful again by Cinna's hand. He really knows how to bring out the right parts. He has Katniss down to a tee.

Once we get to the old Justice Building of District Eleven we are rushed inside, we have no time to stop and look around. We are pushed towards the front as fast as they can get us to walk. People walk fast around us, clipping on microphones, mussing up my hair, and by the time we're to the doors to walk on to the stage, I'm out of breath for them. They push us forward and before we walk out hand in hand, Effie reminds us with a, "_Big Smiles!"_ We're out the door, into a round of non-enthusiastic applause. This can't be the whole population; there is no way. Only those who did not have to work to today, those who could stand to watch the "lucky" victors say their thanks. The mayor moves to the microphone and speaks a speech in our honor. While he's talking I look to the families of Rue and Thresh, I knew they would have sorrow, I just never knew it would be this much. I can see it in Rue's family; their hearts still ache. I can see they way they try to hold themselves together, all huddled close together, a tear ready to roll at the drop of a pin in each child's eyes. Then there's Thresh's family, small, only two people, but they're broken too. The Games don't only break the Victors, they break the families of the forgotten tributes as well.

We're given flowers and then it's our turn to speak. I go over the rehearsed lines from the Capitol letting them flow easily out of my mouth. Katniss concludes the rest, now it's time to give personal thanks. I speak, "I'd like to thank the family of Rue," I look directly at them, their eyes wide open, their hearts aching, "Rue was a strong girl, no matter how small she was." I see a couple smiles in the crowd, "She made it to the final eight. That alone is amazing. Rue is very special to me, even though I never actually met her. She kept Katniss going, she gave her a reason to fight. If Rue hadn't been there, maybe I wouldn't be here, that's why I will never be able to repay her and she truly means a lot to both Katniss and I." I turn looking to Thresh's small, broken family, "Thresh was strong, he was a very admirable person. He could have decided to end Katniss' life and then I would be nowhere. By saving Katniss, he saved me. I will never be able to repay him either." Now it's my time, to give them my thanks, even though it will never be enough, "_It can in no way replace your losses, but as token of our thanks we'd like for each of the tributes' families from District Eleven to receive one month of our winnings every year for the duration of our lives."_

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**I hope you liked it! This is my last update until maybe Sunday. Sorry! Anyways, Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	10. Chapter 10

**Here's the net chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire so any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 10**

Once the words leave my mouth, the crowd does what any would do. They don't applaud or anything like that, no, they're too astonished for any of that, instead they let out gasps, silent thanks leaves their mouths. Then since I'm done I step away from the podium. I know Katniss didn't have anything prepared, but I expected her to say something, anything, to these two broken families. Katniss loved Rue almost as much as Prim and Thresh saved her life, they deserved something. Katniss kisses me on the cheek and I expect her to go to say thanks, but she doesn't step to the microphone to say anything. Instead we both step back as the mayor steps forward again.

We're both handed huge plaques, Katniss sets done her bouquet of flowers just to hold it. It's almost over; soon we'll be back inside the Justice building getting ready for a banquet. I look at Katniss' face her eyes are going back and forth across the crowd, but then they stop. I see them settle on Rue's family just as the mayor says the final words. Her face registers something, anguish, loss, whatever it was it wasn't happy. She stumbles forward and yells, "_Wait!" _The mayor stops in the middle of a sentence, the whole square goes silent, this was unexpected. I can feel Effie screaming back in the building, but I don't think Katniss cares, she won't let this day pass with out saying a thanks to Rue. I don't care either, this is one of the many things I love about Katniss, how absolutely caring she is.

She loved Rue. Nothing can ever change that.

"_Wait, please." _The mayor doesn't argue he simply steps away from the microphone and waits for her to take her spot. "_I want to give my thanks to the tributes of District Eleven. I only ever spoke to Thresh once," _She looks to his small family of two, their faces not so full of sadness anymore, but of shock, as the girl that could have died so he could live gives her thanks. She praises Thresh and how strong he was, how didn't give into the careers pleading for him to fight with them. He could never do that. Not with what I've seen of this place, it would be betrayal.

Me saying it was silent before was an understatement. Now all there is, is Katniss' voice, her heart beating loudly. I'm not sure if anyone is actually breathing. It's strange looking out into the large group of people and not hearing a thing. Then it's time for Katniss to address Rue's family, they're faces still show sorrow, "_But I feel as if I did know Rue, and she'll always be with me. Everything beautiful brings her to mind. I see her in the yellow flowers that grow in the Meadow by my house. I see her in the mockingjays that sing in the trees. But most of all, I see her in my sister, Prim." _Katniss' eyes threaten tears, as her voice becomes the least bit shaky. "_Thank you for your children. And thank you all for the bread." _Katniss stands at the microphone, no words moving from her mouth now, she's just there. I can see her face suppress sadness her body comes in slightly towards her heart. In the next moments something beautiful happens. Some one whistles, a simple tune, but I remember it from right before the mutts. The mockingjays had loved it. It was Rue's whistle. I see the guy that did it, he's old and gray-haired but from one look in his eyes I can tell he's wise. No one would have guessed the events that were happening as people begin to do the three-finger salute from District Twelve.

The salute means many things. But mostly it's respect, mostly done at funerals, but never like this. Never given from a different district. But it's so perfect as every one raises their finger to their lips and extends their arms out. Everyone does it at the same time, something practiced, not spontaneous. Katniss opens her eyes and takes it all in, and I give this moment to her, not that I would ever take it away, but I feel like some one not really here, some one watching from afar. The moment is over too quick, now it's time to go, to move on from this unforgettable moment. We accept one final round of applause then we must leave the stage.

I put my arm around Katniss and lead her away from the crowd. I will never forget what happened, even if it wasn't for me, I still saw the eyes of the people, broken and lost with out their many forgotten tributes. The Hunger Games doesn't affect just the families, no, it affects the whole districts. It affects the whole country.

Katniss stops just inside the door, maybe trying to process what happened, but she stands there to long for it to be that, "_Are you all right?" _I say keeping my arm around her as if to steady her.

"_Just dizzy. The sun was so bright. I forgot my flowers." _She says in a confused state as she looks at the huge bouquet of them in my hands.

"_I'll get them," _I let go of her and turn around going to retrieve them, however she was feeling, she definitely didn't need to exert herself.

"_I can."_ She follows after me, even though I still go to retrieve them. I've walked two steps before I see it; the harsh Peacekeepers taking the man that whistled and forcing him to the ground. No one has left yet; they all wait to see his horrible fate that is sure to come. The worst part is that the Peacekeepers want them to watch. It's quick, the pull of the trigger, the sound of the bullet coming out. No unsettling cannon sounds, no, this isn't the Games, it real life. Except you didn't need a cannon to know that he had died. You didn't need a cannon to know that his heart had stopped beating and he had taken his last breath.

You just knew.

What ever happened before, it wasn't out of respect. As Peacekeepers push us back inside, I piece together why Katniss was acting like that. She wasn't dizzy, it was much more than that. We are in more danger that Katniss ever let on. And I need to know why.

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**I hope you liked it! Okay, so I'm a little weird(if you haven't figured that out yet) and I don't know why I think this, but I know there's people that read, and just don't review, if you're already an author on here you know that it shows you how many views, so any ways those people that don't review (Yes I do love you!) but I picture you guys as looking like Clove (Isabella Furhman) (Yes even if you're a guy :) Don't ask me why because truthfully I don't know, but from now on I'm calling you guys my Clovely's! Hey Clovely's! How are you? Anyways, I need a name for my reviewers (Hunger-Games related) so you guys should give me ideas! I love all the Clovely's and I love all the reviewers(name yet to be picked!) You guys are awesome! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	11. Chapter 11

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire so any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 11**

In the few seconds that we're pushed roughly back into the building, I realize something I should have noticed months ago, the Capitol does really hate us. I knew that, but I didn't full understand it. I hate the Capitol, all they've done to the twelve innocent districts; we supply everything for them, yet they give us nothing in return. They killed a man because he wanted to respect Katniss, a girl that helped their district in a hard time, when they lost people that they adored.

I hate the Peacekeepers that push us back inside that are way too rough with us for something we didn't even do, "_We're going!" _One Peacekeeper has a tight hold on Katniss and I can't stand it, I push him away, "_We get it, all right? Come on Katniss." _I lead her towards the door, I know this has made me mad beyond belief, but Katniss has something else in her eyes, something unrecognizable.

I see our team, all standing staring at the blank televisions, all lost. Their faces show shock, but I don't think they saw the murder of the all too innocent man. They would never have shown that on these shiny Capitol televisions. "_What happened?"_ Effie rushes over to us. I try to compose myself, Effie would never understand my anger, and she would never believe the truth. "_We lost the feed just after Katniss's beautiful speech, and then Haymitch said he thought he heard a gun fire, and I said it was ridiculous, but who knows? There are lunatics everywhere!"_ She doesn't even suspect the Peacekeepers; it would never be them in her eyes. She wouldn't believe it even if she had witnessed it. The Capitol has brainwashed her since the day she was born. I can't blame her, but I can't tell her the truth either.

"_Nothing happened, Effie." _I let my eyes find Haymitch and I can see in his eyes that he knows the truth, "_An old truck backfired." _It doesn't calm me down much when we hear two more gunshots, two more dead, two more no longer breathing. My nightmares have become somewhat of reality; only we're not in the arena where deaths are expected to happen, we're in the real world. There's a silence, maybe Effie realizes the truth, but I think I'm dreaming to big on that one.

"_Both of you. With me," _say Haymitch. I'm glad he leads us away from the rest of the group, we needed to talk; they were hiding something from me. I had a feeling it was something very important. Why don't they trust me with information?

We walk through the hallways of the old creaky Justice Building of District Eleven. Haymitch seems to know where to go, which turn to take, which stairs to climb, I wonder why he put this to memory. He couldn't have spent more than two days in District Eleven; it must've been where he went to release anger. It's a good thing; I can feel the anger rushing through my blood, infecting my whole body. This wasn't fair, it never was, but it didn't fully hit me until now. The man whistled and now he's dead, what about his wife, his grandchildren, I bet they never expected this.

I don't pay attention to the turns we take or the things we do, I just follow Haymitch, my eyes tinted red. I realize things as we walk at a fast pace down the halls, things I never thought about until now. I hated this country, and it hates me, we never really had a great relationship. But what of those people out there, the people that Katniss and I gave hope? They're part of this country, they're what keep it strong, but the leaders, especially Snow don't like them either.

Finally we make it to a room, small and dark and dusty, it's the only place that the Capitol hopefully won't be listening to. We're in five steps before Haymitch turns around, "_What happened?" _I explain all of it trying to calm myself done as the words come out faster and faster, I hope he understands.

Finally I'm done the things that happened only moments ago; laid out in the open, "_What's going on Haymitch?" _I nearly spit out. I need to know; this has to be so much more.

"_It will be better coming from you," _Haymitch turns to Katniss, who stands behind me, her eyes set on the grimy windows behind Haymitch. You can see her heart-rate pick up and the room become instantly tense.

"President Snow came to my house yesterday." Her words don't sound shaky or lost, they seem sure and careful and practiced. She must have wanted to tell me. She lays out a whole intricate story that I was oblivious to. There were district beginning to rise against the Capitol because of our stunt with the berries. People didn't believe it was out of young love. People were too smart to see behind Katniss' lying love. There was a kiss between Gale that she tells me about, that Snow had somehow found out about. I knew there was something there. The whole country might fall because of what we did. Because neither of us could live if the other had to die, "_I was supposed to fix things on this tour. Make everyone who had doubted believe I acted out of love. Calm things down. But obviously, all I've done today is get three people killed, and now everyone in the square will be punished." _President Snow had also threatened her family, which meant mine was in jeopardy as well.

By the end of things Katniss' voice has turned weak and her knees have begun to shake. She goes and sits down on a dusty old couch. I'm too mad to do that. If they had told me, maybe things would be better. "_Then I made things worse, too. By giving the money."_ Finally the anger bubbles out, I hit an old lamp sitting on a dusty table. The way it crashes on the ground helps a little, but it doesn't make the situation at hand any better. "_This has to stop. Right now." _I look at both of them, their eyes wide and shocked, "_This—this – game you two play, where you tell each other secrets but keep them from me like I'm too inconsequential or stupid or weak to handle them." _That's how this made me feel, like I was unimportant, like I didn't have an important part to play as well.

"_It's not like that, Peeta—" _Katniss looks so young, so harmless, with a golden headband a simple dress, she wasn't anything that Cinna portrayed her to be. Both of us held the fate of our country in our hands, we were important. That's not what her outfit put across, but it worked. She didn't look like the heartbreaker, secret-keeper, girl that she was.

"_It's exactly like that!" _I scream at both of them, I was getting tired of this, "_I have people I care about, too, Katniss! Family and friends back in District Twelve who will be just as dead as yours if we don't pull this thing off. So, after all we went through in the arena, don't I even rate the truth from you!" _If she didn't want to love me, I at least deserved truth, communication. It happened to us both and I'm tired of her acting like it only happened to her. Katniss doesn't say anything she looks away from me as I try to hold her gaze to see something in those bright grey eyes of hers.

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**I hope you liked it! I really like this part in the book, don't know why, but I do, so I liked writing it! So I only got two suggestions of names for my reviewers and I'm going with Mockingjay's! So reviewers, you are my Mockingjay's! And non-reviewers you're my Clovely's! I love all my Mockingjay's and all my Clovely's! Next chapter will be up tomorrow, maybe two? Depends on how many reviews I get :) And of course on how I'm feeling, don't want my writing to suck:( Haha anyways don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	12. Chapter 12

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire so any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 12**

My anger doesn't lessen any as Haymitch begins to speak, to try and rationalize what they've done. "_You're always so reliably good, Peeta. So smart about how you present yourself before the cameras. I didn't want to disrupt that." _Haymitch lets that stupid lie flow out of his mouth. He knows I can lie, he knows how easily words come from my mouth.

"_Well you overestimated me. Because I really screwed up today. What do you think is going to happen to Rue's and Thresh's families? Do you think they'll get their share of our winnings? Do you think I gave them a bright future? Because I think they'll be lucky if they survive the day!" _I remember the two other gunshots, who was that? Thresh's family of two, or Rue's parents? I'm so full of anger right now I can't stand it. I push something else over I didn't quite see what it was, but it was bigger than the lamp. Again it doesn't stop the anger, but that shattering sound helps, just a little.

"_He's right, Haymitch," _Says Katniss. She's somehow calm through all this, even as she sees me angrier than ever. She's just sitting there slightly turned away from me looking at Haymitch, "_We were wrong not to tell him. Even back in the Capitol." _With those five words I'm thrown back to my feelings just out of the Games. I was broken, there was no doubt in that, but I thought I had Katniss to help put me back together. I had hope that should not have been there. Hope that would've never happened if they had just told me.

"_Even in the arena, you two had some sort of system worked out, didn't you?" _There's no other way Katniss would have acted so in love, there had to be something, unless she really did love me. But I can't question that right now, not with three people dead, probably more now, and the fate of the country in my hands. I can't stand here and think about all the reasons why it should be real and all the reasons why it isn't. We just have to make sure the country believes it's real. I've somehow calmed down a little bit, the anger has finally begun to leach out, "_Something I wasn't a part of." _

"_No. Not officially. I just could tell what Haymitch wanted me to do by what he sent, or didn't send." _I think back to the games, after our first kiss a pot of broth came. After an emotionally charged conversation we got the lamb stew. Or how nothing came until she showed up. I just was the one that wasn't paying attention.

"_Well, I never had the opportunity. Because he never sent me anything until you showed up."_ I didn't expect anything from him. Haymitch knew I would want it all to go to Katniss, but some things would have been nice. Like some burn cream, or I don't know, just something to tell me that he was there and that if I needed him he would help me. But there was nothing, nothing at all. With the careers and sitting by the bank, I felt so alone, and there was nothing. I thought maybe Haymitch liked me, that we had a relationship, but I wasn't so sure before Katniss found me.

"_Look, boy—" _He must see it, the loneliness I felt in the Games.

"_Don't bother, Haymitch. I know you had to choose one of us. And I'd have wanted it to be her," _He knew that, he didn't have to explain. But when it came to this, where we're both alive and breathing, and our actions can cause many things to happen, I needed to know, "_But this is something different. People are dead out there. More will follow unless we're very good. We all know I'm better than Katniss in front of the cameras. No one needs to coach me on what to say. But I have to know what I'm walking into." _Maybe if I hadn't offered up the winnings there would be fewer deaths. Maybe if I had known…

"_From now on, you'll be fully informed."_ Says Haymitch and I hope I can trust him. I hope they won't keep secrets from me anymore. But I still can't fully believe it.

"_I better be," _With that I'm gone. I don't look at either of them as I leave. I'm not sure if I remember the ways through the halls, but I hope it's easy.

I walk down the halls and think of what could have been different if they told me. Not as many deaths? That would have been better. That would have been way better. I still feel the anger inside of me. Pulsing through my veins. It's so silent in these forgotten hallways that I loose myself in the sound of my echoing footsteps.

It's fast. My mood changes from anger to just downright sorrow within a matter of seconds. All I want to do now is curl up in a ball and let all the pain of these innocent people's deaths come out through my tears.

But I can't do that, there are cameras, if they saw this, the Capitol would be horrified. Victors do not cry, not unless it's out of victory. Which these tears would not be out of victory, they would be out of the pain of my soul breaking even more. The pain of having to watch another person die. It wasn't easy being a victor. And it definitely wasn't easy being a citizen of Panem.

"Peeta, there you are!" It's Portia coming down the hall, no cameras follow. Just her fast footsteps mixed with mine. "We have to get ready for dinner!" She comes up and grabs me. It's time to start this show. Katniss loves me. I love Katniss. We are in love.

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**I hope you liked it! Sorry it's so short! I might have the next chapter up today, depends on how I feel and if you Mockingjay's feel like talking to day :) But if I don't post it today, then the next update won't be until Saturday, because I've got a busy Thursday and Friday! Sorry! Hey Clovely's! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	13. Chapter 13

**Here's the next chapter! Sorry it took so long to update! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire so any direct quotes will be in italics. **

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**Ch. 13**

Sleep doesn't come anymore. Not after I know that I'm partially to blame for the deaths of innocent people. Painting barely calms me at night either, and the extra paint that I brought is becoming less and less with each stroke. I know that when I get to the Capitol there will be an endless supply, but in between the districts, I don't ask for it. By the night we're going to District Seven I'm out and I spend my night wandering through the train. The first night I did it, the attendant that helped me find the canvases and paint looked at me weird, but she got used to it after just one time.

Of course I didn't wander far. I could hear Katniss's broken screams; I could feel her pain. I just didn't know how she could even sleep. There was only one thing I could do. I knew what she was going through the pain that filled her head and heart and consumed her body each night; I felt it everyday. I knew that the only real way to fix it for me was to have her there, in my arms, our hearts beating as one. She may have wanted to deny that's what she wanted to, but she just didn't know it. Those nights in the cave, both locked in each other's arms it did something, it held us together when we should have been totally broken. When I climb into her bed and calm her as tears cascade down her cheeks, I know she feels it to. We need this.

The dinner in District Eleven had gone along well. Katniss and I were whole together, not broken victors lost from months apart. Needless to say our whole team wanted out of there by the end of the night. Everyone tried to be nice and celebrate us, but that day had no need for celebration. We left the station late at night, my heart was heavy and my eyelids were as well.

The next few Districts were blurs, just the Capitol written speech, and Katniss and I deeply in love. I felt bad; I didn't even now the names of the forgotten tributes' whose families had stood before us. I waited for the nights were we stopped the acting, and let all the lies we've told ourselves in the past months fade away and we could just be together. We weren't lying in each other's arms for the Capitol, but for us, so that maybe we could get some piece of mind. And each night Katniss would wake up a scream on her lips and I would be there to calm her down. Just having her there made it so I could sleep, the nightmares didn't seem so real anymore.

"Peeta! Peeta!" Katniss was shaking me awake, her screams must have not wakened me. I wake up fast as she calls my name and hold her, gently caressing her back.

"Katniss, it wasn't real. See we're on a train." I reassure her and hold her even closer, if that's even possible.

"But the mutts, and the…" Her voice trails off into blank fear, her face shows nothing, but fright.

"Katniss, it's okay, I've got you. You're here in my arms, see. None of that was real." She relaxes a little, but it was slight, and I'm not sure I've calmed her down just yet.

"But, Peeta it was real. You're paintings even show it." Another all to real dream about the arena, a reminder of what we've been through.

"No Katniss, that's over now. Gone, done with. We're safe now. Prim's at home sleeping safely. We're all safe." Then she relaxes fully and snuggles her face down into my neck. I can feel her wet tears against my skin.

"Peeta?" She whispers softly, the tears have begun to subside.

"Yes, I'm here." I tell her and rock her back and forth, just a little bit.

"Thank you." The words come out full of so much meaning, that they don't sound like simple words used in everyday life. I don't say anything back instead I keep on rocking her, waiting for her eyes to close, and for her to fall back asleep.

In District Five, I see Foxface's family. Just two parents; both with red hair, her mom full of the fox-like features. They both have that same look of awareness that she did. They are intelligent. They never meet my eyes, but I want them to, since I can't say anything of my own words to them. I want them to look into my eyes and know how sincerely sorry I was that their daughter had to die. I hoped I could do it at the dinner, but they did not show. Their table sat empty, two cards with names of people who would never come to dinner to celebrate children who could have been dead with their child alive. After I thought about it, I wouldn't want them to come. Katniss' and my love would feel like rubbing it in their face. I would never want to hurt them even more than I already have.

District Four was hard too. I had a special connection with Kelly. She was too nice to be a career, yet too much of a killer to not be. We would have been friends, I could tell, if she had lived in District Twelve. In District Four, they have the victors of pass years sit in the front row during our thanks. There has to be more than twenty. They don't look comfortable, instead tense; they all remember what this was like. I see Finnick, the one who Kelly had deeply admired. He sits next to a girl; she looks so innocent, yet so broken. A victor even more shattered than the rest of us. Her gaze is just ahead; staring at one fixed point, but her eyes looks so lost. Finnick holds onto her hand, not too tightly, just there to reassure her. Maybe Finnick Odair wasn't that bad after all.

The next Districts aren't as hard. Their parents don't show much sorrow, and they are actually only a few of the parents that did show at the banquet. They smiled at us, and even though their kid is dead they don't even look like they cared. But it was a good transition into the Capitol. Those Districts are like their little pets. At least at night I got to hold Katniss in my arms, and all the anger was leached away.

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**I hope you liked it! Hopefully there will be another chapter today, since I was only able to update twice this week, I know it's horrible! Sorry! Hey Clovely's! Hey Mockingjay's! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	14. Chapter 14

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 14**

I wasn't expecting this, these words to come out of her mouth. They seem so rushed and not at all thought about. Just a last resort. "I think you should propose to me." We had just been eating dinner and talking about really nothing and she just said this. I know we must do this, if it convinces the districts that we are indeed in love, but I don't want it to be an act or anything like that. I've always wanted it to be real. On good days when my nightmares weren't that threatening I would think about what I would say to her. I always wanted it to be just us two, in the comfort of a home, all alone, not in front of the whole country. But of course that's if the love was real, if she didn't care, then I guess this is what we had to do.

"Yeah, that sounds like a good plan." I stand and listen to the conversation between Haymitch and Katniss for a few minutes, but I feel the tears begin to fall, and I don't think that would be to good in front of everyone. "I'm going to my room." I leave the room.

We are back to the Capitol. Back in the training center were all of this began. Where Haymitch and I planned to keep Katniss alive. My room is familiar, and even though it was the beginning of my nightmares, it's almost like a home, but only almost.

I let the tears begin to fall and the pain that all this acting has done to me come out. It wasn't easy, well it was easy being in love with her, but it wasn't easy knowing that she wasn't. It's almost like staying with a cheating wife, even though she keeps on cheating on you. And what if we really have to get married for the sake of our loved-ones lives? Will she just turn around and go off to Gale? A lie. My whole life will be a lie.

Then when were older and were expected to start having kids. What will we tell them? Sorry, but Katniss and I aren't able to have kids. We were saddened by this news and we hope that we will someday be able to adopt. I can already see the interview with Caesar Flickerman. Maybe if we're lucky we'll just fade away. Only to come back to the Capitol as mentors. Maybe we'll only have to act in love during that part of the year, maybe that would be bearable.

Would District Twelve understand? Would they question Katniss and I not living together even as a so-called married couple? Maybe we will live together. From these past few nights with her in my arms, I can tell that it's bringing me back in. I'm no longer a million tiny pieces scattered across the floor. I'm becoming Peeta Mellark again. Katniss has seemed to get at least a little better as well.

I hear Haymitch's steady knock a gallon of tears later. I'm pretty sure I'm drained for a while. "Come in." I let my tired voice out. If I'm going to be ready for the interview tonight, I should probably rest, but I don't think I can.

"Just coming in to check on you." He walks in and shuts the door behind him. He sits on my bed and looks at me, his eyes slightly glazed over.

"I'm fine. I get to propose to the girl of my dreams don't I?" I try to smile, but it's just too hard, it's almost impossible.

"Yeah, but…" He doesn't finish the sentence, but we both know what it implies. Katniss doesn't really love me. Then there's Marcus back home who believes that she genuinely does love me. I'd be lying if I said I didn't partially believe him. Those nights in the arena had something real to them. I know they did.

"Haymitch I'll be fine. If this is my fate, I have to go along with it. If I am going to be stuck with anyone, I'd want it to be Katniss. You know that." He begins to get up.

"Well, I just want you to be happy." He's almost to the door.

"Don't worry, I will. Most days." He doesn't say anything instead just walks out the door and thankfully leaves me alone again. I'm not sure I'll be completely happy, but as long as Katniss will talk to me, as long as she doesn't leave me again, I'll be okay.

I wasn't excited that my prep team would be coming in, in a matter of minutes to get me ready for the interview with Caesar tonight. They were way too happy. So I was glad and thankful when Portia came in by herself.

"Where is the team?" I ask as she begins to brush out my just showered hair.

"I thought I'd give them the night off. They're getting ready for the banquet. Besides you don't really need a lot of work. Your almost perfect just the way you are." She smiles at me in the mirror, and I thank whoever assigned her to District Twelve, her and Cinna were probably the best designers out there.

"Almost? I thought I already was?" Portia always knew how to put a smile on my face. She had really enjoyed herself getting to tour all the Districts, and despite Effie's efforts had decided that District Twelve was indeed her favorite.

"Oops. Sorry. You are! It must've just slipped my mind." Portia and I go back in forth in easy conversation like this until I'm ready to take the stage. I hadn't seen Katniss since she suggested the proposal. She looked gorgeous and innocent once again. Any man would be lucky to propose to her. And I was the one that got to do it.

Caesar's questions, were easy and light-hearted, and the answers where full of lies.

"How has it been back home?" He had asked mid-interview.

"Oh, it's been a great couple months. Katniss and I have gotten even closer, and our new homes are amazing." The lie comes out of my mouth so easily, but it was better than the truth. The new house is too big for me and Katniss had been ignoring me constantly, but since I found painting, it has gotten slightly better. No, the Capitol would hate that answer.

Soon it was near the end, and it was time for the proposal. "Any words on your futures?" Caesar asked, looking at Katniss and I snuggled in close. I look out across the thousands of audience members. All waiting for something exciting. I try to imagine this different, there are no cameras recording, no people watching, instead just her and me and a candle lit table.

"Yes Caesar, there are some words I'd like to say." I turn to Katniss and get down on one knee, looking her straight in the eye; I hope she knows all the words I'm about to say are true. "That first day I saw you in kindergarten was really the beginning of my life. I had instantly fallen in love with that little girl, braids swinging against her back. I had no idea that girl would take me on such a crazy adventure like this. I had no idea I would love that girl with one hundred percent of my heart. But I do. Katniss you have held me together for a long time, and I would never take back any moment shared with you. No matter how hard some of those moments were. Katniss I love you with all of me and I would be honored to be your one and only. Katniss will you marry me?"

She doesn't even hesitate as she lets out the answer, "Yes!" I jump up quickly and swing her around, getting lost in the moment. I don't hear the screaming people in the background or Caesar shouting congratulations. All I hear is both of our hearts beating in sync. We kiss each other and I forget all the heartache she has caused me. This moment feels so real I almost forget it's fake. But then I'm brought back into reality as President Snow comes onto the stage. We can't fail him. We can't fail him. It all seems good as he shakes my hand and pats me on the back. It all seems good.

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**I hope you liked it! Did you like the proposal? Hate it? Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	15. Chapter 15

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own CF so any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 15**

"_What do you think about throwing them a wedding right here in the Capitol?"_ Says President Snow, after the crowd silences. My initial thought was no, absolutely not. Something as scared as a wedding should not take place in such a ruined and corrupted community. It should be back home in the beauty of District Twelve. Then I'm brought back to reality once again. This isn't for Katniss and I; it's to protect our families, to keep the country from falling. We can't get a nice wedding back home; we get a gigantic one in the Capitol. The source of my nightmares.

I try to act happy along with Katniss, who is right now too happy for her own good. She's jumping up and down, hugging me, and practically screaming with the crowd. I can't tell what has gotten into her.

The party after words is almost too much. The ceiling of the room seems to be lifted away showing the stars of a night sky. I know there is a ceiling; the Capitol people have probably never been able to look at the real stars. Lights are left on all night through out the city; the people are blind to what is beyond the earth. It's probably why they're so into themselves. They don't see the bigger picture.

Looking out across the room is a sight in itself, table after table after table, all filled with food. There are piles of everything imaginable that is edible, of course, on trays carried by avoxes. I don't know how I'll decide what to eat when Katniss leans over, "_I want to taste everything in the room." _I look at her like a she's a crazy person. Something's gotten into her; she hasn't been this happy or energetic, well since ever. I try to find what's going on inside that head of hers when I realize the cameras watching carefully; this isn't time to question. Later, when were back at the training center, maybe then I can ask her.

I lean back over to her, "_Well then you better pace yourself." _I look back over what seems to be hundreds of tables, I don't think I could eat a fourth of what they have here.

"_Okay, no more than one bite of each dish." _I have to say, it's nice not having to be completely broken in front of each other, like we are each night. Just like this, this is nice. Her hand is clamped in mine and our words go back in forth in easy, comfortable conversation. No relaying of nightmares, or conversations about the last months, which are short and don't last long, just this, as an "engaged" couple trying to eat everything in this gigantic room.

The first table we come across is filled with every type of soup, hot, cold, dinner dessert, everything. Katniss takes one bite of the first soup, I can see a huge dilemma cross her face, one bite obviously wasn't enough. "One bite." I remind her, and gesture to all the other tables. She moves to the next soup and has the same dilemma all over again. I'm following close behind her and trying each one as well, every one is absolutely heavenly and I'm not sure how I urge myself to move on.

Katniss finally finds her weakness an orange pumpkin brew. She looks mischievously at me as she plunges her spoon back in another time and takes another bite. She begins to shovel it into her mouth and it makes me laugh, "_I could just eat this all night!"_ I grab her hand and point to one of the tables stacked with breads.

"But look Katniss, doesn't that look amazing!" She drops the spoons and lets her head swivel around the room. She moves onto the next soup almost instantly. She does the same thing with two other soups, but I miraculously get her to move on.

It's when we're moving to the next table that the first Capitol person comes up to us. "Oh, well if it isn't the engaged couple!" She had bright green hair, and scary purple eyes. She acted like we've known her for ages as she brought us both into a hug. She smelled of heavy perfume and cats, it wasn't at all something that I wanted to smell tonight, or ever. "Your proposal was absolutely beautiful. I must say; it brought me to tears. I can't believe how far you guys have come!"

"Yes, well thank-you." There are other words exchanged, and Katniss who I expect to be standoffish isn't, at all. All we want to do is eat and people who know us too well for their own good interrupt the eating.

Too soon, it's too soon that our stomachs fill up. Katniss has begun to hand me the food that she is unable to eat. My stomach is becoming dangerously full. I almost settle on giving up, but then there's another dish that I just have to try. We've decided to take a break when Katniss' prep team comes up to us, their walk isn't steady, not one bit.

"_Why aren't you eating?"_ asks the plump one, who has a light green skin.

"_I have been, but I can't hold another bite," _Katniss holds her stomach as if at any moment that pumpkin soup will reappear.

Her whole prep team breaks out in huge laughter, what annoys me the most is that they treat us like we're dumb, "_No one lets that stop them,"_ says the male in Katniss' prep team, he has bright orange hair and purple lipstick, "_Drink this!" _He points to a table were wineglasses sit, each filled with an unknown liquid. I pick it up to try it and they begin to freak out.

"_Not here!"_

_ "You have to do it in there or you'll get it all over the floor." _She points to the bathrooms. It all comes together. This drink is used to throw up.

"_You mean this will make me puke?"_ It's sick, disgusting, there is children starving back home, dieing because, they never have had a full meal. And here in the Capitol, that only survives because of the Districts, they eat so much they make themselves throw-up so they can eat even more. It is absolutely revolting.

Her prep team is so ignorant as they talk about it like it's nothing. I set the glass back down, wanting nothing to do with it. I grab Katniss' hand and say, "_Come on, Katniss, let's dance." _With that we're away from that table, away from those people, I just wish I could leave this place right now.

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**I hope you liked it! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	16. Chapter 16

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 16**

I was blind sighted by bright colors and innocent faces, by people who were never innocent. There's all these people here tonight stuffing their faces, throwing up on purpose, and eating even more. The garbage cans are filled with perfectly fine food, the people walk around unaware of the dying children in the Districts. Heck, they watch them die for entertainment.

Katniss and I walk to the dance floor. I want nothing more now than to curl into each other's arms and dare the nightmares to come, but we can't, this huge party of uncaring people is for us. I pull Katniss in and she sets her head onto my shoulder. We sway, back and forth, around and around; both sickened by the people surrounding us.

I try not to blame this kind of thing on the people, but on the society that raised them. Then things like this happen, they could act differently, they could choose to eat a normal amount, and they could. Society told them to act this way, I try to reason, society made them unaware to the world, but I can't rationalize it anymore. They are all people; they should know what is right and what is wrong. Maybe their moral compass is a little off, but I don't know, "_You go along thinking you can deal with it, thinking maybe they're not so bad, and then you—" _I try to let Katniss into my thoughts, but I can't seem to let them out.

We sway more and let the sweet melody over take the moment, maybe Katniss will speak, maybe she won't, but either way it won't change what they did. She lifts here head up as one song fades into another, "_Peeta, they bring us here to fight to the death for their entertainment. Really this is nothing by comparison." _She says, and it's not like I forgot that, but somehow it dons on me. Katniss and I are fighting for the Capitol to stay intact; the Capitol that ruined our lives, the Capitol that runs these peoples lives. Why would we ever want to do that?

"_I know, I know that. It's just sometimes I can't stand it anymore. To the point where… I'm not sure what I'll do." _Risk my family's lives? "_Maybe we were wrong, Katniss."_ My voice is down low and couldn't be heard unless somebody was standing right by us.

"_About what?"_ She asks totally oblivious.

"_About trying to subdue things in the districts," _My voice is now even softer; the words come out not sure. I know what Katniss sees behind those words, hope, but also fear, fear of loss. Katniss doesn't need any more loss. I see that hope for less than a second then the fear comes fast and stays there. Her head swivels back and forth, making sure no one heard my rebellious words. "_Sorry."_ I say. What has she seen in her head when I said those words? A world with out the Hunger Games, or a world with out Prim? I know which one she would never want. She would die for Prim, even if it meant going into the Hunger Games. No there is no talk of rebellion, not until we're sure Snow will be gone.

"_Save it for home." _Her words are firm and fearful, but somewhere deep in that voice of hers I did hear hope.

Before I can say any other words, Portia comes over, a large man on her arm. "Peeta, Katniss, this is Plutarch Heavensbee, he is the new Head Gamemaker." I shake the man's hand. Just another ignorant Capitol citizen.

"Peeta, may I steal your Fiancé for a dance?" asks Plutarch. I look to Katniss, her face looks weary, but it could just be because of the conversation we just had.

"Don't keep her too long." I joke and hold her arm out to him; Portia grabs me away from the dance floor.

"Is it real?" Asks Portia once we've gotten a good distance away from them.

"What?" I ask as she pulls me towards one of the many dessert tables.

"The proposal."

"Well, yeah, I mean we're getting married." I hope Portia gets what I mean. I hope she knows that I would never really propose in front of the whole country. It wasn't me. It wasn't what I stood for.

"Well, it was lovely." She hugs me and lets me know she understands. She's whisked away by other Capitol people within a matter of seconds.

If the country were really to revolt against the Capitol, would President Snow even try to harm our families? That's a stupid question, of course he would. I'm getting my hopes up for no reason. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place; here we have a time to revolt, to fight against this evil government, but what of Prim or Marcus, would they make it out alive? I no longer want any connection to these people, no ties to say that I actually talked to them. They disgust me.

They look so innocent all across this gigantic room, laughter floats through out the whole building, people chatting with everyone, and children playing freely, I wonder what it would feel like to be like one of them. To not care, to not know what is beyond those mountains that separate them from the districts. I wonder what it would be like to be so ignorant that you find entertainment in death. A shudder goes down my spine as I realize how crucial it is that we get away from this. Maybe this will takes it's own course, maybe we'll be free before we know it.

"Peeta?" I turn around to an unfamiliar voice, "You frost cakes, right?" It's one of the Capitol bakers pushing out a tray of cakes towards me.

Innocent. So innocent.

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**I hope you liked it! Sorry it was so short! Wow, I updated four days in a row! It's a miracle! Haha, but my Mockingjay's haven't been very chatty lately :) Okay so once you're done reading this and reviewing (of course) you should go to Youtube and watch the video Bad Lip Reading: The Hunger Games. It is seriously one of the best videos ever! Go Watch it! Or you will regret it! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	17. Chapter 17

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, so any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 17**

"Peeta! I just made this, do you think it looks good?" Yet another baker holds out a cake to me, carefully frosted, but not perfectly executed. They all stand there holding out their own cakes. Suddenly it becomes very clear how tired I am. I cannot wait for the moment that Effie will come and whisk us away to the train.

Katniss comes up quick and grabs my hand, she gives me a small smile, but there is something there behind it. I can't quite put my finger on it. "How about you all give me a sample to take home. That way I can admire them in the quiet. I'll get back to you." They all leave to the kitchen to get their samples for me. I'm not sure that I'll have the final say in if they get promoted or not, but they seem to value my opinion, a lot.

"_Effie said we have to be on the train at one. I wonder what time it is." _I say as all the too eager bakers leave.

"_Almost midnight." _Says Katniss and I swear her eyes rolled. She pulls a chocolate flower from one of the nearby cakes and takes tiny bites of it, savoring each and every one. I don't think she cares that a multitude of people could have seen that, or a sneaky camera could have caught, just like me she's tired and over it.

Effie sneaks up behind us and whirls us around forcing us to look at the huge room filled with tons of ignorant people. I had almost forgot about them. "_Time to say thank you and farewell!" _She takes us throughout the room to say goodbye to important people, pick up our team, and get one last final bite of that perfect food. I'm excited to say goodbye to Snow, I want to look him in the eye and just intimidate him like he does to so many. I want to show him that the districts aren't as powerless has they seem. I want to show him how much of a coward he really is. If his country might fall apart because of two emotional sixteen year-olds he probably isn't a very good leader either.

"Well it's time to go, we got to get back to District Twelve on time!" There was no farewell to Snow; no time to show him how scared he should be.

_"Shouldn't we thank President Snow? It's his house." _I want to see him so badly.

"_Oh, he's not a big one for parties. Too busy. I've already arranged for the necessary notes and gifts to be sent to him tomorrow. There you are!" _Effie rushes over to a very drunk Haymitch being supported by two Capitol Attendants. Effie's words only meant one thing to me; even President Snow didn't like his own people. Shouldn't he know, he helped create them.

In the car on the way to the train station Katniss sets her head on my shoulder, her eyes flutter open and closed, open and closed as we get closer to our awaiting train. Out the window I see all types of Capitol citizen, every one of them looks happy, or if not happy at least they have a smile on their face. They have no idea what else lies in this country, what their leaders do to the people that support them. I wonder if when they're children if they question the Hunger Games, if they know in their heart of hearts that it's wrong. But then they grow up and lies are fed to them, morals are pushed away, and ignorance blossoms.

The car is slow getting to the station, but somehow we are there right on time. The train pulls away almost as soon as we are aboard. Cinna orders tea and we all sit around the table, except for Haymitch who is probably back in his room passed out.

"Well, we're not over yet. We still have a lot to do." Effie begins to rattle off the schedule of what will happen in District Twelve. I look forward to the days that the cameras leave again and all that's left behind from the Victory Tour is Katniss's and my relationship. "_There's the Harvest Festival in District Twelve to think about. So I suggest we drink our tea and head straight to bed." _Only minutes ago I was tired, but now in the train I don't feel so tired anymore. When everyone has gone to their rooms I find that same Capitol attendant in the place she always is.

"I requested more paint once we got to the Capitol. Did they get it?" I ask already picturing the painting I wanted to put onto the canvas.

"Congratulations Mr. Mellark." It seems so long ago that I got down on one knee and purposed to Katniss, but it couldn't be more than a few hours ago that it happened. I nod my head at her and accept her congratulations. "Umm, yes we did get the paint. It should be in the same car where your paintings are. Do you need a reminder where that is?" She seems much more alert than she was the first night. I wonder if she was invited to the party. Probably not, not with this job.

"No, but thank you. Have a good night." I turn around and go to the car that holds all my nightmares. Tonight I will not paint nightmares, but dreams, yes my most beautiful dream ever.

I get started on it. First the sky, a light blue with the yellow sun leaving the sky to welcome darkness. A few bright stars shine in the horizon. I then move to the landscape once my gentle strokes have created the perfect sky. I paint a meadow filled with flowers and tall wild grasses. Then I begin on the people. First a couple, their backs to the painting, their faces not shone. The girl, a braid falling across her back is rested against the boy, his arm protecting her. His blonde hair is cut short and in the way he stands you cannot tell he only has one leg. Now I moves onto the dream, children, three of them. Each with the girl's dark brown hair and bright grey eyes, each playing freely in the meadow. There is no fear or loss in this painting that I let my simple strokes create, only freedom.

Once finished the only thing I want to do is show Katniss. Show her that maybe someday everything will be okay. I heard no screams coming from her room as I painted; no nightmares have come to her tonight. I know that if I show her, things might not be well anymore, so I set it underneath my bed and tell the attendant to move it off the train when we get home. I want to keep this painting forever. I move into Katniss's room, and for once while she's sleeping I see peace in her face. Now I feel the weight of the day come over me again. Now all I have to do is wait for that painting to become true. I make myself comfortable in Katniss bed, and as I wrap my arms around her, I know that no matter what happens, I will always need her.

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**I hope you liked it! Did you like the painting? I really hope you did! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	18. Chapter 18

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own CF so any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 18**

I actually slept through the night. Well considering that I didn't go to bed until at least three. But I actually slept through the night and no nightmares came to haunt me, only Katniss in my arms sleeping peacefully as well. I'm almost taken aback when I wake up in the afternoon light and see the train zooming past the landscape. We'll be home soon. I've been missing Marcus and the beauty of District Twelve and the people that are well aware of how horrible the Capitol is.

Katniss wakes up and turns into my chest, she looks up at me her eyes smiling. "_No nightmares," _I say, it's a feat for both of us. I haven't not had a nightmare since the train back from the Hunger Games, and that's only because my mind was too heartbroken to even create dream. Maybe it's the fact that back home we won't have to worry about being good enough for President Snow, or maybe it's the fact for me that I finally let my dream out onto canvas. I finally let it flow from my brain down my hand and onto that off-white canvas that turned into something beautiful.

"_What?"_ She hadn't realized it yet either, it was just so surreal. I didn't like the fact that I had somehow gotten used to the routine of nightmares, but I had, and I can tell Katniss did as well.

"_You didn't have any nightmares last night." _I say looking at her, willing a smile to come across my face, this was something to celebrate.

"_I had a dream though. I was following a mockingjay through the woods. For a long time. It was Rue, really. I mean, when it sang, it had her voice." _Her face doesn't show fear anymore, like it had for almost the whole victory tour. Home is close, there were no nightmares, and she was visited by Rue.

"_Where did she take you?"_ I take a stray hair and brush it away from her forehead. I wish I would've been able to have a dream, a real one, the ones that would make me want to fall asleep, and not fear it. I want that back, just another thing the Capitol has taken away from me.

"_I don't know. We never arrived, but I felt happy." _Happiness, it's an emotion Katniss and I haven't even come close to for ages. Sure, with Katniss in my arms, I feel content, but there's still this thing in my head that keeps me from being completely happy. It's comprised of many things, Cato's last dying sounds, the girl that I put out of her misery, Foxface's unfair death, the courageous heart of Thresh as he let Katniss go, and much, much more. With those things constantly coming up in my head, I can't really be happy, no, but through Rue, Katniss has almost reached it.

"_Well, you slept like you were happy." _Katniss's face last night, not only etched peacefulness, but there was happiness there as well. Katniss pauses in our conversation, she just looks at me for a second then looks away, out the window as the trees become thicker.

"_Peeta, how come I never know when you're having nightmares?" _She whispers, returning her eyes to mine.

"_I don't know. I don't think I cry out or thrash around or anything. I just come to, paralyzed with terror."_ Sometimes I scream, just not with Katniss in my arms, not when I can feel her heart beating with mine. Instead, I just come out of my dream, scared half to death, but then I feel her steady breath against my neck and I almost forget the terror that had just played through out my mind.

"_You should wake me." _That wouldn't get us anywhere. Katniss would get hardly any sleep, and besides I don't need her awake anyways.

"_It's not necessary. My nightmares are usually about losing you. I'm okay once I realize your here." _ Katniss sighs and looks away, back out the window. The silence stretches out before us and with both our well-rested minds we don't fall asleep.

My mind wanders to what is to come. We've both reached the perfect place, no nightmares and yet tonight will be spent in our own beds away from each other. Katniss's mom would never stand for Katniss to come spend the night or for me to sleep in her daughter's bed, even if we are "engaged". Katniss moves slightly away from me, it's a small move, but I feel it. Something has come across her mind, maybe the same thing that crossed mine.

"_Be worse when we're home and I'm sleeping alone again." _I move out of the bed and to the window, I can feel the District Twelve air, we are close.

"Yeah," Katniss murmurs as she stays still in bed.

"Good morning!" Effie comes into the room with out a knock, the door flings wide open. "Oh sorry, Peeta, I didn't know you were in here." Effie knew I was in here; Katniss and I have been sleeping in the same bed for quite a while on the tour. She doesn't need to act obliviously. "Oh, well anyways, we're almost to District Twelve. I suggest you go get dressed." She gestures for me to leave the room, "Be in the dining car in fifteen minutes, I'll be going over today's schedule."

Once we get back, there is no time to go to our houses; we must go to the Mayor's house to get ready. We get to see our family members to night at dinner. I can't wait to see Marcus and tell him all that has happened. I sit quietly through the prepping and wait for the moment that I will see him comes.

Katniss and I come into the dining room together, hand in hand still in love. Katniss seems a little tense, but I just put it off as anxiousness for seeing Prim. Once we're seated and the dinner has taken place I begin to get up. "I'm going to go see Marcus." I whisper in Katniss's ear, "You should go talk to your family." I walk over to the table that my family is sitting at. To my surprise they all smile as I come near. I give them all hugs and my mom tells me how handsome I was on the tour. They also give me congratulations on the engagement. Once all the catching up has finished Marcus leans over.

"Is the engagement real?" He whispers in my ear.

"Kind of," I whisper back, "I have a lot to tell you."

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**I hope you liked it! I will probably update again tonight! Yay! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	19. Chapter 19

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own CF so any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 19**

Over the next few days only one thing became clear, the Capitol had to be taken down. Each time I went into town, I saw the suffering, the hidden pain in everybody's eyes. I wonder what it was like all those years ago, before the Hunger Games, before the first rebellion, when the country of Panem was brand new. It obviously didn't work that well, there had to be a reason that the Districts rebelled, but when it was brand new, when something had grown out of the broken world, was there peace? For just a second was there peace? Did people not fear anything, but death that would only come at old age? I want that, a world like that, a world where I'm not afraid to have children. I can feel it in the district; they want it as well.

Marcus had followed me home after the dinner; questions came pouring out of his mouth once I had shut the door. Later into the night the questions had become harder, more thought out, and I began to not know how to answer them. I can't flat out tell Marcus the whole truth; he is one of the people that are content. He lives above his father's bakery, works there, lives a good life, he would not care if the country stayed the way it was.

"So, you and Katniss, succeeded right?" I had laid it all out, the events in District Eleven, why Katniss and I must stay together, what will happen if we don't. I don't tell him of my true feelings, of how some part of me wanted to fail, how some small part of me wanted to rebel. Over the past days that small part has grown to almost all of me. I was ready to lead an army.

"I don't know." I answered back flat. He looked ahead at the roaring fire, the coals which were now being created. His face showed confliction. This could mean his life. I hadn't left that part out. "I won't let them harm you Marcus, you know that, right?" His face dropped for a second and no words came for minutes.

"You don't really decide that do you? I mean I could just be gone one day and you wouldn't be able to do anything about it." His words stung. There is absolutely no way that I can control what the Capitol does to my family. I hate it.

"You'll be safe." I say and throw another log into the dying fire.

"I hope so." His eyes dropped to the floor and he avoided my gaze for the rest of the night. There weren't many more words spoken, only short tellings of what had happened here at home in the past weeks. The conversation that held so many things had ended. No talk of rebellion with Marcus; that would be too hard.

Mentioning it to Katniss at the Capitol party had already told me enough of her response, it was too risky. But I had to tell someone, so I settled on Haymitch. He would be able to handle it with a drink in hand.

"Haymitch!" I call out into his huge, hollow house.

"I'm in the living room." I walk into the living room; he's laying on the couch, taking up the whole entire thing. I shove his legs over and take my spot on the couch. His place, like always, is a mess.

"Do you know," I pause searching for the right words, "If Katniss and I, uhh, succeeded?" I ask looking at him as his eyes look away from me.

"I guess only time will tell." He picks himself up and sits up right; at least he had some courteousy. "Why?"

"Would it be bad if I said, part of me wanted to fail?" I look him straight in the eye and hope he gets what I'm trying to get across. I can't really come out and say it; there is no doubt the houses in Victors Village are bugged.

"That's not what our country need right now." He answers back. For just a second he seems to be just another ignorant Capitol person, but then I realize he's Haymitch, he must have a reason, "We need to become one together, not like this all separate. Maybe it will happen someday, but now is not the time." His words make since to me, but I can't stand this country for another second. I need another plan maybe Katniss can come up with it, since she is way against a rebellion.

"I'm having dinner with my family tonight. I better go. Thanks Haymitch. You really keep my head straight." Haymitch begins to lie back down before I've even stood up. The victory tour must've really warn him out.

Just as I'm leaving Victor's Village I see Katniss. She walks, her face showing signs of discouragement. "_Been hunting?" _I call out, her cheeks are red, which I'm sure is from the cold temperatures.

"_Not really. Going to town?" _ She asks.

"_Yes. I'm supposed to eat dinner with my family." _They seem to be making an effort to see me more. I'm sure Marcus had mentioned that we needed to spend more time.

"_Well, I can at least walk you in." _I liked this, Katniss actually talking to me. It's been nice the last couple of days, when I deliver the bread she answers. I've gotten to see her everyday. I just wish she could be in my arms each night. We walk in silence only listening to the sounds of our footsteps as we come closer and closer to town. "_Peeta, if I asked you to run away from the district with me, would you?" _The words rush out of her mouth and I'm taken aback, it seems she has already come up with another plan before I've even mentioned it.

I stop and grab her arm, "_Depends on why you're asking."_

_ "President Snow wasn't convinced by me," _Why then was she so happy at the party? "_There's an uprising in eight. We have to get out." _Instead of facing a rebellion head on, Katniss wants to run away. And from the small conversation with Haymitch, it doesn't seem like a bad option, but how would we survive in the wild?

"_By 'we' do you mean just you and me? No." _Katniss would never leave Gale, let alone Prim, "_Who else would be going?"_

_ "My family. Yours, if they want to come," _My family would never make it out in the wild, "_Haymitch, maybe." _I'm surprised Gale isn't mentioned.

"_What about Gale?" _I ask.

"_I don't know. He might have other plans." _Yeah for it just be Katniss and him. He would never allow the whole gang to come along.

"_I bet he does." _Since this is only plan I have, "_Sure, Katniss I'll go." _

Her face picks up just a little as she says, "_You will?" _I doubt this plan will ever go through. You don't just up and leave the comfort of home like that and Katniss would never be able to leave Gale forever. They were too close.

"_Yeah. But I don't think for a minute you will," _Plus, maybe down in her heart of hearts a rebellion is a little tempting. It would be to anyone.

She jerks her arm away from my hold, "_Then you don't know me. Be ready. It could be anytime." _She turns away and continues the walk into town, her pace is quick and it's hard to keep up with her. I call after her and finally she slows down to kick a piece of snow, doing so I catch up to her. "_I will go, if you want me to. I just think we better talk it through wit Haymitch. Make sure we won't be making things worse for everyone." _I can already see the newscast: Attention the Star-crossed lovers of District Twelve have gone missing, we are working with all our effort to find them.

Off in the distance I hear something, the loud sound of something hitting something, it doesn't sound pretty. "_What's that?" _No, nothing good can come from that sound.

"_Come on," _I urge Katniss to follow me; we're close to the square now. There is a huge crowd gathered and no one looks like they are enjoying themselves. I step up on a crate to get a good look at what every one is so upset about it. It takes me a couple seconds before I see it. The rise of the whip and the fast fall as it comes across skin. I don't place the face at first, but then I recognize it quick. Katniss is halfway up to look around, she can't see it; she will only get herself more hurt. "_Get down. Get out of here!" _

She's stubborn as always and she tries to step up onto the crate, "_What?"_

_ "Go home, Katniss! I'll be there in a minute, I swear!" _She yanks herself from my grab and begins to go through the crowd. She cannot see this, no. She cannot see Gale being harmed.

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**I hope you liked it! It's the longest chapter I've written for Rekindled Fire, so I hope it was good! Tell me what you think, don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boyithbreadlover**


	20. Chapter 20

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own CF so any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 20**

It is like Katniss knows its Gale before she's even seen his face. Her movements are urgent and fast and I can't keep up with her as she pushes through the crowd. I thought maybe I could grab her before she reached the center to find Gale being whipped. The people start to make the path harder to get through and I hear as they try to get Katniss to turn around. They know this is not a good situation for her to see.

You can see the moment Katniss realizes who it is. Even from behind, you see her step falter and her head go slightly back, but it's quick because before you even know it she's running to Gale. She's running to protect him.

Time slows. Time slows as the whip begins to fall and come across Katniss's face. The worst part is I can't even do anything about it. The scary part is the man doing it didn't even show remorse in his eyes. He's new, I don't know many Peacekeepers, but I've never seen this man before. He doesn't look like the normal Peacekeepers that I see around here. Public whippings aren't a normal occurrence, I'm not sure they've even had one since I was born. His face has harsh features, and I feel he almost finds pleasure in not only hurting Gale, but Katniss as well.

I'm frozen, and I don't do anything as the next whip hits Katniss. I can't move my legs, my arms, my mouth nothing. People are urging me to move forward now; they're pushing me towards Katniss. I'm the only one that can do anything. Then I see Haymitch across the way, coming out through the crowd. It's less than a second that he takes in the whole situation. "_Hold it!" _He screams almost instantly. When Haymitch was needed, Haymitch stepped up. You could always trust this broken victor.

He makes his way up to the place of the whipping, almost pushing the new peacekeeper off of it. _"Oh, excellent." _He has a hold of Katniss, but he's making sure not to hurt her even more than she is already. I try to go up there still but I can't.

I look at Gale, he's out dead and his back is covered in blood. I never thought I'd feel sorry for the boy that I envied most, but I do. He is in all words broken. He lies there

vulnerable and aching and part of me knows he's dying right there. We need to get him out of here. Back to Katniss's where her mom can help him.

The man tries to argue with Haymitch and I know I must help. I finally get my legs to move, "_He was poaching. What business is it of hers anyway?" _He says. I've made it up there now and I have a hold of Katniss's other arm, but it's only there for support, to tell her I'm there.

_"He's her cousin." _I say harshly, I automatically hate this guy. "_And she's my fiancée. So if you want to get to him expect to go through both of us."_ Gale couldn't take another lash that much was clear_. _This Peacekeeper couldn't do much to us. He would probably be fired. Even if we are a national threat, well, to Snow anyways.

Another Peacekeeper steps forward, her face is recognizable, some one who has been around since I was young, "_I believe, for a first offense the required number of lashes has been dispensed, sir. Unless your sentence is death, which we would carry out by firing squad." _I feel Katniss's muscles tense even more at the last sentence because maybe this guy is evil enough to just go ahead and kill him.

"_Is that standard protocol here?" _He asks. It's now clear in his eyes he doesn't want to kill anyone. He probably only did this to show us who's boss now, he wears the uniform of a Head Peacekeeper. I wonder where old Cray went.

"_Yes, sir." _Says the lady.

"_Very well. Get your cousin out of here, then, girl. And if he comes to, remind him next time he poaches off the Capitol's land, I'll assemble a firing squad personally." _I'm not sure whether to take his threat seriously as he walks away. Doesn't he know, Gale lives off what he gets in the "Capitol's land", if he doesn't get shot for doing it, he'll starve for not. Of course, Katniss wouldn't let that happen, but I doubt the hunting will stop; they'll just have to be sneakier.

Once this new Head Peacekeeper is gone, Katniss falls to her knees immediately besides Gale. Her fingers are useless trying to undo the knots that hold him there. Someone pulls out a knife and I cut him out of it. Katniss's face is desperate and her eyes are full of fear as she looks at him.

"_Better get him to your mother." _Says Haymitch and I bet if he hadn't Katniss would have just sat there all night. But we all feel it, the fight for life that is going on inside Gale, death couldn't be far off. Let's just hope Katniss's mom can work her magic, that everything will be okay, cause no matter how much I envied him, I knew Katniss could never loose another person. Especially not Gale.

I see she feels this too as she goes to get a board to carry him home on. Katniss had already lost too much, she didn't need to be mourning something else, especially when that list included her freedom to choose who she wanted to marry. If she had to be stuck with me, I could at least tell she wanted Gale to be there too. Gale couldn't die. No. That's why were urgent as we carry him into Victors Village. That's why we know we must get him there fast. That's why Katniss is so lost on the walk back home that I feel she might collapse. I'm not only doing this for Gale, but a big part of me is doing it for Katniss as well.

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**I hope you liked it! Sorry I didn't update yesterday, I was being lazy and decided to take a day off. Tell me what you think, don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	21. Chapter 21

**Here's the next chapter! I really like this one, so enjoy! I do not own CF so any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 21**

The only words of explanation that Mrs. Everdeen needs before she gets to work on Gale are, "_New head." _and once we've set him down on the table she works on, she's all over the place. Working with Gale's back, going to the cabinet to get some kind of medicine, and nicely, like equals, telling Prim where to go. I can't handle this; I've seen too much pain in my life as it is. Then there's Katniss, watching hopelessly as her mother and sister work to keep her best friend alive. Best friend doesn't even describe their relationship from what I'm seeing now. No, there's more, Katniss looks like she feels the pain too, that she's dying right along with him. I wonder if this had happened to me if she would be so worried?

Haymitch sees me in the corner looking straight at Katniss, her face swollen from the lash across her face and the tears spilling slowly out. I can only imagine what my face looks like, heartbroken? Because that's exactly how I feel. "Peeta." Haymitch softly nudges me. "I think it's best you go be with your family right now. You don't need to see this."

Only now does it don on me that when Katniss told me Gale had other plans he had wanted to stay and face the rebellion head on. Maybe we were more alike than I thought. I don't know why it had hit me all of a sudden, maybe it was the way the room felt, or the lashes across his back; it just did. Gale couldn't stand this country any more than I could. "He wants the rebellion too, doesn't he?" I ask Haymitch, doubting he'd even know.

Haymitch just shakes his head and looks at the door, "Your family might be worried, and the snow is going to pick up. I'd leave right now." The snow had started falling, thick and heavy just as we reached the home. I don't know why Haymitch would want me to take that long hike. "And, if it gets to much, just stay with your family for the night." I motion my head towards Katniss with question in my eyes. "No, she doesn't need you right now." He turns and walks away; over to Hazel who holds her son's hand tight and the tears flow freely.

No one acknowledges me as I walk out of the house into the cold winter night; it's like no one even cared. It is hard walking through the snow, out of Victor's Village and back into town. The sun had gone away a while ago and the moon that could've helped was hidden by the bright white clouds. I'm glad I wear a heavy coat, and the boots I have on are a parting gift from Portia, they don't let any dampness into my socks. Even so, I'm freezing by the time I reach my home, or the home my family lives in. The lights are on and the firestone-oven is still working away. The fragrance reaches me even outside the house. The only time my dad baked this late was when he was worried. Surely this news should have reached them.

"Peeta." Marcus pulls me into a hug as soon as I set a foot into the bakery.

"Listen, Gale—" I try to explain, but Marcus cuts me off.

"We heard. Nothing's really kept quiet in this town for long. Especially when there's a new head." Says Marcus and he goes back to whatever bread or pastry he was working on.

"He shouldn't even have been hunting. He knows better. It's about time he got caught." Says Rhys, instantly coming into our conversation as he comes from upstairs.

"Cray didn't do anything, he thought it would be fine. The hunting he does keeps him alive. Rhys, some people aren't as lucky as we are. You have to know that." I shoot back at him. Like my dad I've always felt sympathy for the people from the Seam, sometimes I envied how closely knit they really were.

"I do. But you don't see all the people from the Seam risking their lives hunting. They find food other ways."

"Rhys you know that's not true. People are starving out there!" My voice has begun to rise.

"Well, maybe they should try harder!" He retorts.

"Boys!" My mom enters the room and the argument is over within seconds, "Peeta why are you late? We had to eat dinner with out you. It would have gotten cold." My mom doesn't move to hug me instead she sits down in an old wooden chair.

"I was helping with Gale." My mom frowns and looks away. I move around the counter and begin to join my brothers in making bread. We're all tense and you can feel it in the room. Still we work silently, working with the only thing we've known since we were tiny.

Pretty soon it's just me working, mixing dough, kneading it, throwing it into the oven, making even more. I could never fall asleep like this. Not with the fear of a new Head Peacekeeper, the ever becoming real rebellion, and the fact that it seemed Katniss had forgotten all about me when Gale needed her attention. I got it, I did, but it didn't make me feel any better that I did. I wasn't always there, Gale was. He helped pick up the pieces when her father had died; he helped keep her and her family alive. No one, not even me could ever break that connection.

Early in the morning when the snow had stopped for just a second and I'd filled up pretty much the whole display case, I had left. A couple loaves of bread in hand and with out a goodbye to my family.

Before going into Katniss's I had decided to go home for a change of clothes, but even before that I had stopped out side her window. It was like I was watching strangers. Two people I had never even met before. The girl, looked tired and lost and with out hope. The boy was in pain, his face showed trails of tears going down his cheeks. The girl whispered to him and he whispered back no matter how much energy it took for both of them to talk, you could tell there was love between those two. A yearning, a lost want. The boy's head falls back on his pillow, and the girl with a tear rolling down her face on to the ruffled sheet leans in and touches her lips against the boy's. There was no doubt; this girl was completely committed to this boy and the boy completely committed to this girl. There was no room for another broken boy, a broken boy who needed this girl even more. Maybe even more than the boy that she had just kissed needed her.

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**I hope you liked it! Okay so a couple words, please read this: Hi, I feel as if I was spoiled with reviewers with the Fate Games, I had a lot of normal reviewers (people who reviewed on almost every chapter) and now all those people have left and all I have is like three of those people now, and they weren't really normal reviewers on The Fate Games. So what I'm saying is that if you've come from reading The Fate Games, I'm wondering, have I gotten worse? Because I feel in the dark. No one has really reviewed, I don't know if I'm doing good, if I'm doing bad, if I need to change something, I don't know anything! So please I know I have more than 3 people reading this! You don't have to do it on every chapter and it will only take like one minute, you can even do it if you don't have a fanfiction account. So if you would like to take the time I'd like to know some stuff: Do you like it so far? Do you like the approach I'm taking? Do I need to change anything? ECT. Please, I feel like I'm writing for three people, But I know you're there! You don't even have to review you can PM me! Thanks for reading this long thing! Shout-out to Keb85, xxellabearxx, and last but definitely not least KatnissMellarkD12 she wrote a fanfic about foxface definitely a good read and I loaf her! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	22. Chapter 22

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own CF so any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 22**

Discouraged, broken, lost, hurt, all these emotions describe me as I stand outside Katniss's house and realize the ugly truth. There never was even the thought of wanting to be with me from Katniss. Not even a wondering of what life would be together, only the dreams of being with Gale for the rest of her life.

She gently lays her head down on the table, and part of me accepts that it was never meant to be me. I will always be the person that she was forced to be with and I don't think she can forget that. Ever. Gale is the person she chose to be with. I'm not sure how long ago her decision was made evident, even to her, but now looking inside her window it's clear, so clear, she not only wants him; she needs him. I turn away before I let it get the best of me. If we have to get it across that we're in love whenever the cameras come back, I can't be to involved with her relationship between Gale. Already knowing that she doesn't love me is hard enough, but knowing that her heart goes out to someone else is almost like killing myself.

The snow begins to fall again, fat drops of frozen water onto the nearly frozen ground. I get into my house fast, but it doesn't make it any better. It makes it worse. Not only is it cold, but empty. No one I love is right here beside me to hold my hand or tell me, reassuringly, that everything will be okay. Turning on the lights doesn't even make it better, I still know there's only one room occupied, that my clothes are the only ones that fill the drawers.

I set the fresh bread in the oven so it will stay warm, then I make the short trip to my room. It's neat and organized and in no way reflects the way I feel. Each thing is right where it's supposed to be, each drawer pushed in, and the bed made tight. Unlike the mess that is going on inside of me. Thoughts are coming left and right, my heart is aching, and I can feel my leg begin to feel pressure against my prosthetic, it happens at the worst times.

Not only do I feel like crying, I feel like fighting, and a little part of me, in the back of my head, is telling me to go insane.

Before I sit down, or shower, or anything, I walk to my closet where the painting of my dream sits. The man in the picture could as easily been Gale as it is me. All I would have to do is paint his hair to the dark color that Gale's is. It could be a wedding present, or even better yet a picture to put in their nursery. I can't believe I was bringing myself to these thoughts. Katniss wouldn't have kids; Katniss couldn't have kids, if the Hunger Games still kept going. This painting was no longer a thing to dream about, but a thing to envy. This could never happen. I take to the closet where my nightmares sit, all waiting to haunt me if I stare at them for too long. I set this one, way in the back, so even if I just glanced in here, it would be invisible. It's as if it had disappeared.

I dress quickly; I need to relieve Katniss and her mom of having to watch Gale. They probably needed rest. When I walk in the door all I hear is an eerie silence. If you listen hard enough you can hear Gale's labored breath, and Katniss's fluttery heart, but that's only if you're listening for it. Katniss sleeps, her head lying down on the table, her hand holding Gale's. She doesn't look very comfortable, but her face looks content.

I walk around them into the kitchen and set two warm loaves of bread down onto the counter. Katniss doesn't wake even with my loud walk or the smell of the bread. I contemplate waking her, she just looks so peaceful, but I doubt sleeping like that for long would be any good. I gently touch her shoulder first and when she doesn't wake, I shake it. She begins to become conscious her eyes search my face, but no words come. She looks almost guilty.

"_Go on up to bed, Katniss. I'll look after him now," _I say and she looks just a little bit innocent as her eyes continue to search my sad face.

"_Peeta. About what I said yesterday, about running—" _I knew she would never do it. Especially now as the rebellion becomes enticing to her, the government hurt Gale, to her it is one of the worst things.

"_I know. There's nothing to explain." _We're both tired and vulnerable and I know right now probably isn't the best time to talk.

"_Peeta—" _Now her face is guilty. Maybe now she realizes what she's done to me, how much she's hurt me. Does she see how broken I am right now?

"_Just go to bed, okay?" _I couldn't handle this right now. Not after I threw my dream away. This wasn't time to talk, maybe that could come later, when we've both slept and I've let my emotions settle down. I let Katniss pass as she goes into her room. Her eyes dart away as my gaze follows her up the stairs. I'm left alone in a room with the guy, who hasn't completely ruined my whole life, but almost. And I can't feel anything, but remorse for him. He looks almost like I do on the inside.

Broken; not whole.

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**I hope you liked it! I so knew you guys were there! You just didn't want to review! Thank you so much for all the wonderful reviews, truthfully before all of you reviewed I wasn't excited to write, but now that you have I am excited to write! I like to know how people respond to it and I can't know if no one tells me! So keep me updated and I'll keep updating chapters! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	23. Chapter 23

**Here's the next chapter! Made my first mistake, it took me awhile but I did! None of you noticed, somebody usually does! Apologies at the bottom! Enjoy! I do not own CF so any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 23**

Late into the morning I'm shaken awake, I guess I my body would let me fall asleep. "Peeta." My eyes open to Mrs. Everdeen's tired and warn down face. She must've been beautiful, years ago, but all the stress of life had made those features almost disappear. You could notice it sometimes, but only if you were really trying to find beauty in her. "You didn't have to stay. You could have came and got me when Katniss fell asleep. Giving us the bread is already too much." She stands up straight and I begin to stretch out my muscles.

It's amazing how my house can have the same exact lay out, but feel so different. Even with a heavily injured man in the room, there's still something there. Love? I'm not sure, but what ever it is, it's evident. "Peeta do you want some bread?" Asks Prim as she slices herself a piece of the bread I baked early this morning.

"No, thank you. I should probably go. You know, talk to my family and all. I'll be back, later. Tell Katniss…" I'm not sure what I wanted to tell Katniss, I just knew I wanted to say something. "Tell her that she should rest." It was a stupid thing to say. It was so obvious. Everyone in this room needed rest.

"We will Peeta. Send our love to your family. We all need to stay together as a District when we get a Head like this. We've done it before, we can do it again." Mrs. Everdeen places her hand on her forehead and lets out a long sigh.

I look out the window and see the snow begin to pick up, I don't think now is a good time to go see my family. It would be best if I just went to my house. "I guess I'll just have to call my family, but I will tell them you said that."

"It sounds like Katniss is getting up. Do you want to stay and talk to her?" Asks Prim holding out a mug of something hot towards me.

"No, I better get home, before I can't even walk there." I say goodbye and I'm out with in seconds. Katniss and I didn't need to talk with an audience; it'd be best to wait a few days.

I move to Haymitch's house first. I needed to check on him and make sure he hadn't killed himself by drinking too much last night. He is alive, but he's not conscious, his face down on the couch, he must've drank a lot last night. There would have been too many nightmares to handle. I start a fire because his house is freezing, leave him a loaf of bread, and I'm gone.

My house is only steps away, but the way the snow is falling, I'm doubting I can even get there. Just feet from my house I see a light and it falls across my face. "Peeta? Peeta, is that you?" It's none other than Delly Cartwright she really knows when to show up at the weirdest times.

"Delly, what are you doing out in this weather?" I find my way to her and guide her up the steps to my house.

"I heard about Gale, and I just wanted to know if you were okay. And I hadn't seen you since the victory tour, I just wanted to see you. Then the snow started to really pick up partway here and I just decided to keep going." We're inside the house now. I move towards the fireplace and begin to throw logs into it.

"Well you're not going anywhere for awhile. Good thing I have some extra rooms. I have some of my mom's clothes here you can borrow those." Delly jumps up and down.

"Peeta this could be fun! Can I use your phone real fast, I need to get a hold of my parents." I nod and she somehow finds her way to the phone. I hear her reassure one of her parents that she's fine and that she'll stay at my house until the storm blows over. She comes up back behind me just as the fire begins.

"Peeta, could you show me where your mom's clothes are. I'm kind of soaked." She gestures down her whole body that is soaking wet. I can see her shivering even as the fire's dry heat fills the home.

"Yeah, come on follow me." Just as we're up the stairs the phone begins to ring. I just point Delly in the general direction and go downstairs to get it. I don't get phone calls that often, I'm not really sure who'd it be.

"_Hey." _It's Katniss and she talks fast, I'd barely even said hello when she began, "_I just wanted to make sure you got home okay." _Obviously she didn't know what to say either. We just wanted to let the other know that we're still there? Was that it? I'm not sure.

"_Katniss, I live three houses away from you," _I say back, trying to get her to admit that in some ways she needed me, needed to know I was there.

"_I know, but the weather and all,"_ I don't even think she'll admit it to herself.

"_Well, I'm fine. Thank you for checking. How's Gale?" _I ask this after a second of deciding whether or not to. It would be rude if I didn't, even if I was just there seconds ago.

"_All right. My mother and Prim are giving him snow coat now." _She answers, it's like we didn't even really know each other, just acquaintances meeting in town.

"_And your face?" _Early this morning when I had urged her to go to bed her face didn't look too good. It was very swollen.

"_I've got some, too. Have you seen Haymitch today?"_ We both knew we had to protect our broken mentor and fellow victor.

"_I checked in on him. Dead drunk. But I built up his fire and left him bread." _Katniss pauses our conversation for just a second and takes a deep breath.

"_I wanted to talk to you—to both of you." _I know what she wants to talk about and we both know it can't be said over these phones. There is probably people in the Capitol listening in on our conversation right now.

"_Probably have to wait until the weather calms down. Nothing much will happen before that, anyway."_

_ "No nothing much." _She answers. We both say goodbye and promise that once the snow stops we'll talk to each other.

I hang up the phone slowly as if not to hurt Katniss any more than she already was, as if she was inside the phone. I walk out in the living room to see Delly, still in her wet clothes, holding none other than the painting I just hid hours ago.

"Peeta this is beautiful." She says.

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**I hope you liked it! So can you think of what my mistake is? If you guessed that I cut out the part with Madge and the morphling, you're right! Argh! I can't believe I missed it! Once again like I said on the Fate Games, I'm only human. But I don't want to be like Lionsgate and cut out Madge completely, so she will be mentioned later, do not worry! Forgive me? Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	24. Chapter 24

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own CF, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 24**

"Delly, how did you find that?" She twirls the painting around so that she can look at it. She looks so innocent; I'm not sure if I should be mad, or happy that she found it.

"Well, there was just so many doors and I just kind of guessed. So I opened a closet and it was filled with all of your painting, they were good, but so dark. Then I saw the corner of this one way towards the back and it was bright and happy, so I looked at it. And I don't know… I just kind of wanted to ask you about it." It's almost comical, Delly holding my unrealistic dream, her hair soaking and her shoulders trembling, but still she looks happy and in some ways content.

"Delly, you need to go get changed first. I'll tell you about it once you've changed." With in a couple seconds I realized something. I needed someone to talk to, someone to lay all of my burdens on. And sure I know Delly runs from conflict, but I feel right now, tonight, she's the only one that would really listen. Marcus was too involved in what was going on, it could mean his life, Delly is safe from what ever President Snow might do, really she's the only one that could listen and understand what I was saying and not really form her own opinion.

This time going up the stairs I take her to the room, show her where the clothes are; give her a towel, and leave. I bet she can't wait to get into the shower.

I decide to call my family, Mrs. Everdeen wanted me to talk to them, and she's right we need to stay together.

"Peeta?" It's my dad; his voice seems tired and rushed.

"Dad, hey, I just wanted to check in. It seems like the storm might go for awhile." I hear his breath quicken as if this troubles him.

"Yeah, it's not the best time for a storm. Business hasn't been real great, and with this we might not have any business for three days." I can just picture his nervous glances and anxious shuffle that he does when something worries him.

"Dad, you know we have enough money. You don't need to worry. Besides you're the only bakery District twelve has you can't go out of business."

"I know." There's an awkward silence in our conversation, but neither of us move to hang up the phone. "The Cartwright girl is over?" He asks minutes later.

"Yeah she was coming to visit me, and the blizzard began. She 's probably going to be here until it settles down."

"Well don't let her leave if it's still going strong." My dad says.

"I know. Mrs. Everdeen wanted me to send her love to you guys. She says we all need to stay strong as a District in times like these." I only remember my dad was in love with Katniss's seconds after I'd finished.

"How is she?" He asks, all too curious.

"Tired. Like the rest of us. Tell the family I said hi. See you when the storm blows over. I'll try to call every so often." I say.

"Bye Peeta. Stay safe. I love you." My dad only uttered those three words on special occasions. It wasn't totally rare, but it was a nice surprise when he did. I hang up the phone and walk to the living room, where Delly sat, her blonde hair wet and drying and wearing my mom's clothes.

"You're sure your mom won't mind me borrowing these?" She asks as I sit next to her on the couch and stare off into the fire.

"Yeah, she doesn't wear those that often." We sit in silence for what seems like hours. You can hear the fire crackling, but other than that it's just the eerie silence that snow always brings and the loud gushes of wind that come every so often.

"You're talented. Like really talented." Delly doesn't have the same enthusiasm that she usually has. She sounds tired and calm, even though it was only a couple hours into the afternoon.

"So I've been told." I answer back. I was tired of being praised for my art; I didn't want to be praised for it. I wanted people to notice all the things that went into it; all the fears and broken feelings, and in the case of the painting sitting up against the couch, my dreams.

"That painting, is it you and Katniss?" she asks and she turns her body, putting her full attention to me.

"Yeah, it's just a dream. It will never actually happen." Delly's face looks perplexed for a second.

"But, Peeta, you're engaged." For a second I had forgotten all about the victory tour, and the moments in it. I had forgotten the proposal and the nights in each other's arms. It was if it had disappeared from my mind. But with one sentence it all came whooshing back into my head. Heartache and all.

"You believe that?" I say and turn to her; I thought the whole District knew it was a fake. Before the victory tour Katniss and I never went into town together.

"Well, you are aren't you? You're going to have a huge wedding in the Capitol." Now is the time to tell some one everything. From the time Katniss told me it was all for the games to the just yesterday when I saw Katniss kiss Gale through the window.

"Delly, can I trust you?" I ask.

"Of course Peeta. I'm all ears." She perks up at her last sentence, as if to show me she'd be the most trustworthy person ever.

"President Snow isn't happy, but to explain that I'll have to start with the train home from the Hunger Games…" I tell her everything and she listens. She doesn't look disinterested or bored for one second, she listens intently, cries at points, and even leans in and gives me a hug at others. The girl that always seemed to shy away from conflict was now listening to my demons with open ears.

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**I hope you liked it! So, you guys think Delly should be for or against the rebellion. Think I've already decided, but tell me what you think and why! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	25. Chapter 25

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire.**

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**Ch. 25**

Delly had sat through it all with out saying many words. It had been nice to just have some one listen. I hadn't talked of the rebellion yet, but I knew I had to say something. We had now moved over to the kitchen our stomachs had begun to rumble. Good thing my parents had just butchered one of our pigs and given me some of the meat or else I'm not sure what we'd be eating.

"Peeta?" Delly says as I begin to cut up the meat and put it into a big soup bowl. I had decided to make my mom's pork stew it always filled me up and it was fast and easy to make.

"Yeah." Delly's cutting some vegetables and we're both putting them into the same pot. Our knives seem to be cutting at the same speed, the sound is synchronized. We both slow as we begin to talk.

"Katniss loves you." Delly seems so sure. Like she knows our relationship inside and out, like she's seen everything that's happened between the two of us. I hadn't completely finished my story. I still had to tell her of the kiss I saw just early this morning.

"Delly. I told you. I mean yeah she may love me in the since of family, but not that way. She's made that clear." I pause and we both listen to the sounds of our knives hitting the hard surface and bouncing up again. "I saw her kiss Gale this morning. They didn't know I was watching, but I saw it. And anybody watching would know that it was love." She stops and looks up from the carrots she was cutting.

"Peeta, she has to be confused. I put myself in her situation and I would be so confused. But I know she loves you. On the night of the Party at President Snow's house they were showing us on the news the highlights of it, and they showed this part. It was you and Katniss dancing and you were standing so close together and her face was vulnerable yet protected and she looked in love. Head over heals, in love. I just can't make myself believe that that was acting." She finishes and goes back the rhythmic chopping of the carrots.

I think about it, I remember that moment. I was mad, and the rebellion was the best idea at that point in time, and all Katniss wanted me to do was stay quiet. No that wasn't acting, not at all, but I'm pretty sure it was just a mistake that it was taken as love.

"Delly, she didn't choose me. I was forced upon her by the Capitol." It's the thing that hurts the most, to know that if she had a choice, I probably wouldn't be it.

"But, Peeta she did. She was ready to die for you. The moment she put the nightlock to her lips, she chose you." I always thought Delly was just the surface, not a person who dug deep, but here she was saying something so obvious that I hadn't really even thought about.

"She knew." What she says can't be true. If Katniss were truly ready to die for me, she wouldn't say she didn't feel anything for me. I don't believe it.

"She knew what?" I finish slicing the pork and begin to add the liquids to the pot.

"She knew the Gamemakers wouldn't kill us both." I say and light the stove. Delly drops the rest of the vegetables in.

"But there was still that chance Peeta. Katniss would only die for few things. You're one of them. She loves you." It's sounds so simple the way she says it. Like it's just an equation in math; it's just the way it's supposed to be.

Delly leaves to go wash up for dinner. My house doesn't seem as empty anymore, with all my emotions shared with another person and with more than one person occupying it, it seems almost like a home. But I know once the storm is over, Delly will be gone and the house will be almost empty again.

Later once the soup is ready and we're sitting at the table, I bring up the rebellion. Delly listens quietly again and only once I'm finished does she state her opinion. "I hate Snow. After what he's done to you and the whole country, he needs to be gone, but it's obviously not just him, it's the way our country is run. A rebellion is probably just what we need." What ever I was expecting, I wasn't expecting this. Delly's life was barely affected by the Capitol. I hear her Grandpa's brother was in the games way back when, but that never affected her. She isn't poverty-stricken or starving, she's fine, perfectly healthy. So when she utters these words I'm kind of shocked.

"Really?" I answer back, I've forgotten my soup and I'm sure it's probably cold by now.

"Of course Peeta. Something's wrong and we need to fix it. I'm not ignorant because I have a few extra bucks. I see all the people from the Seam. It breaks my heart. Peeta, I know I can't do much, but what ever I can do, I'm in. All in. It's time to change some things." I quickly move over to her and envelope her in a hug. She hugs back. "Peeta I can't stand it any more," She says once I've released her, "And now after all you've told me, I can't stand it even more. Things need to change." She smiles to me and it's so innocent once again. She doesn't look like a rebel, at all. But here she was telling me that she would do anything to take this government down. I'm not sure how the rest of the District will respond, but at least this is a start.

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**I hope you liked it! I really liked this one, adding more substance to Delly :) So, you guys aren't really reviewing anymore and I hate to sound annoying, but I'd like it if I could hear from you more often. I don't mean every chapter, but if you told me what you liked or didn't like about a chapter that would be nice. SO with that said do you like what I've done with Delly? Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	26. Chapter 26

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire. **

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**Ch. 26**

It's late into the night that I finally go to sleep. Delly finally tells me about her feelings of the games, before now I wasn't even sure she knew what they were. She had told me that she fell for it just like the Capitol people and still can't bring herself to believe it was fake. She says she sees how genuine I am, but she can see it in Katniss too. I try to tell her, like I have to tell myself sometimes, that it is indeed fake. She kept on denying right unto the moment that I had fallen asleep on the couch. She helped me up to my room and the long conversation of the day had ended.

"Peeta! Peeta!" Delly's shaking me awake. I look at my clock; it's only three in the morning.

"Delly, what are you still doing up?"

"I can never sleep well during storms. It's fine though, your television is quite nice." Only few people could watch what the Capitol had to offer. This late into the night was usually just re-runs. In desperate moments before the Victory Tour I had tried the television, but it only chilled me worse. Sometimes those reruns were past Hunger Games.

"Do you need something?" I ask wondering why she would wake me so early in the morning.

"Well, it's an old rerun of the news. The news from the night of the party. I just I wanted you to see Katniss's face. Come on, it going to be on soon." I knew this was just some false judgment. Katniss wasn't feeling any love for me at that moment. All there was, was anger towards the Capitol people. I really don't want to get out of bed and go all the way downstairs, I am dead tired.

"Delly, do I really have to go?" I ask and stay right were I am in bed.

"Yes. Peeta you need to see what I'm talking about." She grabs my hand and practically yanks me out of bed. "You have your prosthetic on right?" I nod and she brings me to my feet. "Come on it will only be a minute, then you can go back to bed. I promise. You just, you have to see this."

I walk reluctantly down the stairs and to the television. The camera is going over all the food and all the drinks. "The party in honor of our two latest tributes was lavishing. Just after their engagement, Peeta and Katniss look very much in love." The reporter says as the TV shows different shots of the party. Then once our names our mentioned they begin to show us. Eating, greeting people, and then the part Delly was talking about, dancing.

This shot is long and doesn't flash by in a matter of seconds. The sound has changed to the music that was playing in that very moment. It shows my face, I was controlling my anger very well because I look almost content in the room full of ignorant people. Then they show Katniss, and Delly was right, there was something there. It must have been before I started talking about my anger. Because here in this moment that is shown across the screen Katniss looks comfortable with her head resting against my shoulder. I still can't will myself to believe that love is shown across her face; that would hurt way more. It would mean she's been denying her feelings, it would mean that while in her heart she wants me her head is telling her not to want me. I don't want there to be a reason she can't love me, if that's what's really across her face right then I would want her to tell me.

Delly notices the tears before I do, "Peeta! I didn't mean to make you cry. I just I wanted you to see. I'm sorry."

"No Delly, it's not your fault. I needed to see this. I'm going to go back to my room. Maybe you should get some sleep. You're safe here." I leave the room and I don't hear what she says next. I'm a zombie walking up the stairs back to my bedroom.

It could be fake, that face she had, it could be something Delly and I just want to see so we do. I'd like to think that if it were real, that maybe she would choose me. Not Gale. Maybe that's too much to wish for.

"Peeta, I'm heading out. Thank you for letting me stay here. It's been nice and talk to her about it. Maybe she'll answer you." Katniss would never in a million years talk about it, but at least Delly has some wishful thinking.

"Yeah, maybe." Delly and I had spent the last two days, still talking, but not at so much depth. It had really worn me out the first night. I had hidden the painting again and Delly knows to never go back into that closet.

Finally the storm had stopped and the path out of Victor's Village was clear, Delly seemed really happy to get back to her family. I doubt she's been away from them for this long ever.

Immediately once Delly's left the phone begins to ring. I know it's Katniss, we had to talk about the rebellion and how we would deal with it. Of course our somewhat level-headed mentor would be there too.

"Hey, it's me." Katniss sounds better than what she did when she had called me three nights ago. Her voice seems more full and not so empty.

I want to do it. To ask if she's felt love for me, but I know if I do she'll act as if I didn't say anything. Of course I don't, but I do come close to it.

"Weathered the storm well?" I ask instead.

"Yeah, but we're almost out of food. Which is why I called." She says.

"Sorry, I don't have any food either." I know what she's trying to get at, but I'm just trying to be difficult.

"That's why you should go into town with me?" The statement comes out as a question.

"Katniss I'd love to. Should we go get Haymitch too? I'm sure he'll need some liquor." I say. If people really were listening in on our conversations, they wouldn't suspect a thing.

"Yeah. Meet you outside in five?"

"See you then." I hang up and go to get dressed. I'd been getting anxious for this conversation. I couldn't wait to hear what Katniss had to say about it.

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**I hope you liked it! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	27. Chapter 27

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own CF any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 27**

"Katniss," She looks better and the wound from the lash across her face is almost, not quite, but it's almost gone. She looks well rested and somewhere deep in her grey eyes I see a hint of happiness, but the fear and questioning and the lost look in her eyes makes it disappear almost all the way.

"Peeta. You look good." She says and she takes me into a hug. I feel hear heart beating against mine for just a second and then she lets go. "You must have been lonely in there. I would have came over, but you know…" I decided against telling Katniss about Delly. I'm not really sure why I don't want to, but mostly I'm sure she has her secrets from me, I at least want to have one from her.

"No Katniss I was fine. I got a lot of baking done." The clouds that were once omniscient are nowhere in sight and the sun shines brightly behind Katniss's head.

"I'm sure you did. We should go get Haymitch." She turns around and starts to walk towards his house.

I grab her hand and turn her around, "Wait, Katniss I wanted to talk to you before we went to Haymitch." I'm not sure what my eyes show, pain, brokenness? I'm don't know, but what ever it is I see Katniss go into herself and hide from whatever I wanted to tell her.

"Peeta now isn't the time. Not after what just happened to Gale." She pauses and I let go of her hand, her face shows the same guilt that was there the morning I came to relieve her of watching Gale. "I… I need some time." She finishes and turns back towards Haymitch's. I want to scream after to say something along the lines of, "Haven't you had enough time?" But I don't. I don't say anything I just follow after her. I hear what Delly said the first night in my head, "She has to be confused." I have to take that into account.

We wake up Haymitch and somehow with some luck get him out of his house. We all walk silently towards town. What are we supposed to say? The rebellion's coming we have to do something? It's so blunt, so scary, and most of all the worst of our fears, it could mean death.

It's Haymitch who talks first, "_So we're all heading off into the great unknown, are we?"_ He hasn't got the message. The message I got loud and clear when I saw Katniss kiss Gale, we're staying, and if we have to we are fighting.

"_No."_ Katniss answers and it's firm, believable, "_Not anymore." _We keep on walking step after step, breath after breath.

"_Worked through the flaw in that plan, did you, sweetheart?" _Haymitch calls Katniss by her endearing nickname. I can't see her face, but there's no doubt that she's rolling her eyes. "_Any new ideas?" _

There is no hesitation before Katniss says, "_I want to start an uprising." _It's a dramatic change from what she wanted less than a week ago, but it's not like I wouldn't expect it from Katniss. The rebellion had to be enticing to her since the beginning. It was to me.

Haymitch laughs and it's almost mean-hearted. It is as if Katniss could never pull that off, even with the help of Gale and I. "_Well, I want a drink. You let me know how that works out for you though." _

"_Then what's your plan?"_ I'm behind both of them and once again I feel like I have no say, but on the other hand I don't want to really speak up either.

"_My plan is to make sure everything is just perfect for your wedding. I called and rescheduled the photo shoot with out giving too many details."_ Katniss turns her head and I see the red mark, although better than a few days ago, it was still there and the Capitol people would not like it.

"_You don't even have a phone." _She says. I zone out of the conversation it has turned into arguing and I'm sure it's not the response Katniss had wanted. I had already talked to Haymitch about the rebellion, I knew he had reasons, all Katniss had to do was hear him out. But I get her too, I don't like the way our country is. I hate the people who run it, they need to be taken down at whatever cost that is.

Their conversation is silenced when two workers walk past us and once their far enough away the town square is all to close. The town square resembles nothing of what it had shown only four days ago. There's Peacekeepers everywhere, a new banner hangs across the Justice Building and the ground usually covered with coal dust is perfectly clean. Then there's what I can only describe as torchor, there's machine guns across the rooftops and gallows and whipping posts and many different things and the one place I usually feel safe in is now a place to fear. District Twelve is no longer laid back; we are now a target of the Capitol.

Katniss's face is filled with pain when a blaze is seen a ways away. All three of us know what it is, the hob, Haymitch and Katniss seem to be devastated. Katniss went there now to support the people that had helped her in her time of need and Haymitch went there to get liquor. Those people made a living there and were friends of Katniss and Haymitch.

"_Haymitch you don't think everyone was still in—"_ Katniss's voice is cut off by her own fear.

"_Nah, they're smarter than that. You'd be, too, if you'd been around longer."_ I feel that District Twelve has felt this before, in the way everyone talks about it. We must have suffered much before Katniss and I were born. "_Well, I better go see how much rubbing alcohol the apothecary can spare." _Haymitch leaves and I'm left alone with Katniss and the terror that now fills this square.

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**I hope you liked it! Sorry I didn't post yesterday, I was crazy busy! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	28. Chapter 28

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own CF any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 28**

As I walk to the bakery the next day I realize one thing. This doesn't feel like home anymore. Sure I see the same people walking around and the shops are all the same, but there is that little difference that makes it feels weird. Sure I'll probably get used to it someday, but right now I feel as far away from District Twelve as I did while in the Hunger Games.

"Peeta!" I turn around as see two of my old friends from school. I haven't talk to them in really forever and I'm not sure why they chose now to finally say hello. There's Marybell, her hair pulled back and her body wrapped in huge coats, she looks much more mature since I've seen her, and there's Matt who holds her hand and smiles as they walk up to me. They had a thing in school, but I didn't know that had officially gotten together.

Marybell pulls me into a tight hug; "We saw the thing with Gale. That was so brave of you to stand up like that." She steps back and Matt grabs me. They were part of my tight circle of friends.

"It's the only thing I could do. He was hurting Katniss. Not only physically, but mentally as well, this whole thing with Gale has really taken its toll on her." They shift their weight uncomfortably. It was a big question to those in District Twelve who didn't really know the truth, if Gale and Katniss were cousins or not. I see the question in their eyes, they want the truth. I could go either way.

"They're cousins. Right?" Asks Matt and he grabs hold of Marybell's hand again.

"Yeah." I nod my head. It's not the most difficult lie I've ever told, "They're really close. It hurts Katniss a lot when he gets hurt."

"Well we were deeply saddened by it. Look Peeta, we'd love to catch up. But you see we're planning a wedding." She holds up her hand, which shows a slim modest ring, "And I have to go look for a dress." I say my congratulations and goodbyes.

I look over the horizon into the distance before entering the bakery. Only trace amounts of smoke show from the Hob now, but somehow you can feel the sorrow from all the people that worked there. Yesterday I had gone with Katniss to see Hazel, and on the way back we stopped to look at the damage.

The fire was huge and even though we stood feet away from it you could feel the heat. A black liquid ran throughout the ground, "_It's all the coal dust, from the old days."_ She said. She was holding onto my hand tightly when all of a sudden she had let go and I could feel the blood rush back quickly. She took a step towards the fire then looked around, "_I want to go check on Greasy Sae." _

I doubt they wanted to see the people that are partially at blame for this, not that they'd know it, but still their whole lives are basically ruined, "_Not today, Katniss. I don't think we'd be helping anyone by dropping in on them." _I had held out my hand and she had grabbed it. I almost saw a tear roll out of her eye, but she didn't let it fall.

"Peeta!" I've walked into the shop to see Delly standing at the display case. "I didn't expect you to be here! Well I guess I should have, but you know!" She pulls me into a hug.

"Delly, I should be the one that didn't expect you to be here. I thought you'd be sleeping for three days!" The whole time I swear Delly didn't sleep a wink. She was telling the truth when she said she didn't sleep well during storms.

"Oh, I was just going to take a nap after this. My mom wanted me to pick up some bread. I gladly came over!" My dad hands her a loaf and she puts in a bag that must hold the other items she just picked up.

"Well I shouldn't hold you too long. See you around!" Delly's out the door in a matter of seconds and I'm left alone with my dad. He doesn't say a word to me once she's gone he just moves to the counter and begins in on the bread.

"Dad?" I say, wondering if he's okay. He's not one to talk, but he usually says hello.

"Yes, Peeta?" He looks up from the pastry he's looking at.

"Are you okay?" I ask. I move behind the counter and begin to help him.

"Yeah. It's just been a little low on business, but I'm sure it will pick up." He says. He moves to the oven and puts the pastries in.

"Has it been like this before?" I ask and look out side the window to the new District Twelve.

His only answer is, "Yes." But then we walks out of the room and I'm left alone in the shop. It amazes me how much this District has been through and yet Haymitch doesn't want a rebellion. It amazes me how weak some of these people really are. I see them and some of them look happy. Like Marybell and Matt they looked perfectly content. They didn't seem at all affected by what the square now looked like. Would they actually fight if we were sprung into action? Would anybody actually fight?

It's how the Capitol holds us down. Fear. And they're doing really good with it right now. No one will want to fight unless all this goes away. The Capitol has an advantage, but I want to do anything to stop them.

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**I hope you liked it! And I hope you didn't find this chapter unnessacary, just starting the fire in Peeta's belly like it was in Katniss's :) DOn't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	29. Chapter 29

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 29**

"Peeta, a rebellion? No." Marcus looks at me, his face tired from the hard work from today. I had convinced my parents, mostly my mother, to take the prices down for just one day. The mines have been closed and most of the Seam has been suffering. It's the only thing I could think of. We were busy all day and we barely ever got to stop. I had decided to tell Marcus about the rebellion tonight, he said he would stay over and now he's seen all the suffering that is happening in our district.

"Marcus it's the only thing we can do. You saw those people there today. They're dying!" Marcus stays calm as my voice begins to escalate.

"Yes I did see those people, they are in no shape to fight, they are the majority of District Twelve." He answers, taking a sip of the cold water that sits in a sweating glass.

"You know this needs to change." I answer back quietly.

"It's the only thing we know. What if there isn't anything better?" It's such a deep question. What if there really isn't anything better? What if this is the best it gets? But it can't be. I won't believe it. There has to be something better than this.

Just then the phone rings and I move to pick it.

"Peeta?" It's Mrs. Everdeen, her voice is rushed and quiet and scared.

"Mrs. Everdeen, is everything okay?" I can hear her shallow breathing over the line.

"There's Peacekeepers here. They're asking for Katniss. Peeta, she's been gone all day." That could mean only one thing; she's been out hunting. If they find out, it might be death, or close to it anyway.

"I'll be over right away. Don't worry. I'll just go get Haymitch first. We'll act like we were supposed to be over for dinner. It will be fine." I reassure her.

"Thank you Peeta." I hear the phone click.

"Marcus I have to go, you don't have to stay here tonight. Go home. I'll see you later." I walk out of the house and don't even listen to his response.

Reluctance isn't what I wanted from my brother. The government has affected him. His brother, me, almost died because of them, doesn't he want it to change? He saw the suffering today, the barely there children, the starving parents, it can't go on like this forever. I need him on my side, I had his support on everything except this, the thing I wanted him to support the most. I could feel our relationship slowly floating away and I didn't like it, but maybe it was better this way.

"Peeta, Haymitch! So good to see you. Katniss is still getting a couple things, but she should be home soon. Dinner is almost ready." Said Mrs. Everdeen. This wasn't strange for us to come over. In fact the last couple days we'd been over almost every night. It's just this time we had to be extra careful with the Peacekeepers here. "Oh, and the Peacekeepers are here to see Katniss." She turns and walks back into the kitchen.

"Hey Peeta, I heard what you did at the bakery. That was really nice of your parents." Says Prim as she hands me a cup of hot cider. The two Peacekeepers, look stiff, there's man and a woman. The woman holds a cup of cider to, but she looks almost embarrassed when she takes a drink of it.

"Prim it's the least I could do. If my mom would have let me, I would have given it for free." I look at the Peacekeepers and they seem to be talking to themselves, fighting over something.

Finally they stop and the man steps towards me, "Mr. Mellark. Have you seen Miss Everdeen at all today?" Even his words are stiff.

"Well, I've been at the bakery all day, but I mean, I think I saw her walk by this morning. She said she'd be doing some stuff in town today." The man nods and walks back to where the woman stands, it wasn't the answer they were looking for, I can tell, but they don't call me a liar or anything.

We sit for two hours, sometimes talking, sometimes not, finally Haymitch asks if I want to play chess and I agree, even though I'm not that good. I'm happy when we hear Katniss coming up the stairs outside and opening the door. Shock registers on her face for just one second and then it's gone almost absolutely.

"_Hello." _She says, unbiased. The Peacekeepers don't say anything instead they looked shocked. I don't think they were expecting to see her for whatever reason.

"_Here she is, just in time for dinner." _Says Mrs. Everdeen. What ever she was making, it was over hours ago, but she acted like it wasn't done until only a couple minutes ago. She really doesn't want her daughter to get into trouble.

"_Can I help you with something?"_ Katniss asks the Peacekeepers, almost in a rude manner.

"_Head Peacekeeper Thread sent us with a message for you," _says the woman, her voice is stiff too, but there is the least bit of shock leaking into it.

"_They've been waiting for hours," _Katniss's mom lets out a little laugh. I have a feeling she's about to go into hysterics. The whole time she could not sit still, she would walk around the kitchen, fold blankets, sweep, anything but sit still.

"_Must be an important message." _I can hear Katniss rolling her eyes in the way she says that, but she doesn't actually, she's to smart for that.

"_May we ask where you've been, Miss Everdeen?" _They act as if they'll get the answer right out of her, like she'll just blurt out, "I've been hunting. You caught me!" But if being a Victor makes you one thing, it's a liar. I'm pretty sure they should know that.

"_Easier to ask where I haven't been," _Katniss begins an elaborate lie and I get ready to add to it. This could be fun.

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**I hope you liked it! Okay this may be a little too soon, but let's talk Mockingjay, no I'm not doing the same thing where so many people tell me they want me to do it, because people were getting mad. I will be making the decision by myself, but you can encourage me, but it will mostly depend on if I think I can do it. I'm not sure how to write his episodes and I don't want to disappoint you when I do, so, it will all come down to if I think I can. Anyways if I do, do it, I'm thinking I'm going to call it Jabberjay, because Katniss is a Mockingjay, partially the Capitol's creation, but turned into something else that they didn't want. And it makes sense for Peeta to be a Jabberjay, because he becomes a Capitol creation. SO yes I'm already thinking about Mockingjay, even if I'm not halfway done with this one. On another note, I'm excited for the next chapter, because I like that part in the book. SO it might be up tonight! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	30. Chapter 30

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 30**

We have the lie rolling and most of it is true. Like when Prim says she said to go west that's true, I heard her say it last night, but we all know Katniss didn't look for the goatman at all today. Then they ask her the dreaded question, "_What's in the bag?"_ The woman says in a mocking matter as if to say I got you now! But Katniss doesn't even flinch; she must've given it all away.

Katniss simply turns the bag upside down and dumps all the contents on the table, no game, no plants, just stuff she got in town. "_See for yourself." _

_ "Oh good. We're running low on bandages." _Says Katniss's mother.

I see a bag of something that could only be candy so I pick it up to get some kind of delicious treat, "_Ooh, peppermints," _Katniss reaches her hand out for the bag. This is how we normally acted the Peacekeepers were just getting a look into what we do most nights.

"_They're mine," _I toss the bag to Haymitch and he takes a giant fistful of the things and shoves them into his mouth. "_None of you deserves candy!" _The only thing is these Peacekeepers do think we're together, I guess that would be a little different than what we normally do.

"_What because we're right?"_ I say referring to the goatman thing. I wrap my arms around her. It's the slightest sound, but I hear it because I'm so close to her, it's full of pain. Katniss is injured; she shouldn't be standing like this. I want her to sit down, to let her mom do whatever she needs to do. I couldn't stand Katniss being in any more pain than she needed to be. The Peacekeepers needed to leave soon.

"_Okay, Prim said west. I distinctly heard west. And we're all idiots. How's that?" _I say to her.

"_Better," _she answers and accepts my small light kiss. "_You have a message for me?" _She says, as if we have forgotten them.

"_From Head Peacekeeper Thread. He wanted you to know that the fence surrounding District Twelve will now have electricity twenty-four hours a day." _Says the woman with a smirk on her face.

"_Didn't it already?" _says Katniss with an all too innocent voice.

"_He thought you might be interested in passing this to your cousin."_ Says the woman, the man barely even spoke, and it was as if he wasn't even there.

"_Thank you. I'll tell him. I'm sure we'll all sleep a little more soundly now that security has addressed that lapse."_ Katniss was so bad; she was playing the innocent card a little too much. The Peacekeepers leave with out another word and instantly once we can't hear their footsteps anymore I feel Katniss put all of her weight on me. She did not feel good.

"_What is it?"_ I ask. Katniss's mom moves instantly towards Katniss.

"_Oh, I banged up my left foot. The heel. And my tailbone had a bad day, too." _I assist Katniss over to one of the rockers. She lowers herself slowly down onto the couch and her face is full of pain, I wonder how she held it off for so long.

"_What happened?"_ asks Mrs. Everdeen. Katniss tells us that she slipped and fell, but we all know that wasn't the case or else she would have been hurt in front of the Peacekeepers. I'm guessing it had something to do with getting over the fence.

Later that night when we're all tired Mrs. Everdeen gives Katniss some sleep syrup.

"I should have given that to her up stairs. There's no way she'll make it up there now." She says.

"I can take her." I volunteer. At first Katniss tries to walk by herself with the support of my shoulder, but by the time we get to the stairs she can't do it anymore. I pick her up and carry her up the stairs to her room.

I put her into her bed making sure to tuck her in and kiss her on the forehead, "Good night Katniss." She somehow gets a hold of my hand and holds it tightly. I didn't expect such strength from her grasp, but it's there. I would expect her to be all the way asleep now, but she isn't.

"_Don't go yet. Not until I fall asleep." _She whispers pleading with her tired voice. I sit down on the side of the bed and keep hold of her hand. Katniss may be confused, but she was confusing me to. She couldn't have both Gale and I, but that's the way she treated it. It could break me someday.

A couple minutes later, when she hadn't yet fallen asleep, I speak up, "_Almost thought you changed your mind today. When you were late for dinner." _I say, letting what was sitting in the back of my head come out. I knew it couldn't be true, she would never leave with out Prim, but I just had this strange feeling.

"_No, I'd have told you." _She says and her voice keeps on getting quieter and quieter. She takes my hand gently and lays it up against her face. "_Stay with me." _She lets out the last three words before she finally lets the syrup take her.

I let out the only true answer, the only thing that I could really say because who ever Katniss does choose I will be there. Where ever she goes I will have to follow. The Games may have ruined us, but it also branded us together forever. The months after were a stupid mistake for the both of us; Katniss even knew that. So when she says that, I can only say one thing, "_Always."_

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**I hope you liked it! Sorry, it's so short, I'm thinking that I'm going to start writing longer chapters :) Anyways, I'm going somewhere tonight and tomorrow, so there might be one tomorrow, but don't plan on it. Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**_  
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	31. Chapter 31

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire.**

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**Ch. 31**

I don't stay much longer after Katniss falls asleep. I expect her mother to come in and tell me to go home, but when she comes up stairs I hear her walk right past the door. I could have stayed. I wanted to stay. But it just didn't feel right. I know Katniss told me to stay, but she was under the spell of sleep syrup. It can make you say things you never wanted to say. That picture of her kissing Gale still haunts me. If she really truly wanted me to be the one, then why did that even happen? She looked so content in a time of pain and agony. That scene may never leave me.

Once I was sure she was asleep I let go of her hand, stood up, and walked out the door. It would have been nice to have her back in my arms again, but like I said before it wouldn't feel right. Maybe, if one night when she's totally aware and she asks me, being one hundred percent her to stay, maybe then I'd stay. But tonight isn't that night. I just have to be patient.

Later the next morning as I work on bread, cheese-buns today, I get a call.

"My mom's gone and Prim's in school, and I can't really move, so would you like to come over?" It's Katniss and she seems deprived of company, even though her mom probably only left one minute ago.

"Sure Katniss, I'd love to. I'll be over in five." I say and I can practically hear her smile over the line.

"Thanks Peeta." We both hang up at the same time. Why talk on the phone when we could be in each other's company? I pull a jacket on and I'm over there with in minutes, like I said I would be.

I come into the house with out a knock, because with Katniss's foot, I doubt she'll move to get the door. I come in to see her on the couch a giant book sitting across her chest and a slight smile across her face.

"Took you long enough." She says with a laugh. She moves to sit up and I go to set the cheese-buns in the kitchen. "What are those?" She asks all too curious.

"Oh, just some cheese-buns." I call back out; they're fresh, just out of the oven

"Oo, bring me some! They are my favorite you know." I grab one of the hot buns out of the bag that carries them. They're aroma perfectly matches the smell that came up to my room every Monday morning when I was a kid, that's when they were on special and my dad would make plenty extras.

I hand Katniss it and she instantly takes a giant bite. "I didn't know that actually." She nods and eats the rest of it, and as she does so we sit in silence. Her hair is in her normal braid, except right now it falls across her back instead of her shoulder, and her eyes looks somehow brighter today. Maybe the sleep syrup had something to do with it, maybe not, but whatever it was they brightened up the room even more than usual.

She had set the giant book down onto the coffee table and I opened it. The big thing had to be years old and it smelt of dust and hidden cabinets. The first page showed a carefully drawn picture of a plant. Below is a name, and a description of what its uses are. I don't know why it feels old, but it does, by just looking at this you know it was written ages ago. Maybe even back into the dark ages.

I begin to flip through the heavy parchment and the pictures become less faded, newer, some had long descriptions, some only: helps with a cold, but every one thought was put into it. "It's crazy isn't it? How many herbs and plants can be put to use." Says Katniss once I'd flipped about halfway through the book. She leans over and begins to look at it with me.

"Yeah. What's it for exactly?" I stopped flipping and Katniss had continued, pausing on each page and briefly reading each description.

"Some one on my mother's side started it ages ago. He was an herbalist. It's really quite interesting. It's been passed down and passed down and my father," She falters over that word, but it's barely noticeable, "He had so much knowledge about stuff like this, from hunting." She comes to the pages towards the back and her fingers carefully trace the outline of whatever plant it was. She turns the page and the berries that ironically kept us alive are drawn carefully on the page. The description: Extremely poisonous. Never eat these. You will die within minutes.

"It's as if he knew. I remember him telling me about them. We'd come across a bush and he'd picked it up. He said, 'These are nightlock. You must never eat them. You'll be dead within minutes.' What if we'd never found that bush that day?" She says and for just a second she looks up from the book and into my eyes, but hers quickly dart away.

"Things might be a lot simpler." I answer back. I would have eaten them first, I would have died, Katniss would have won, and there would be no threat of our family's lives.

"But at the same time not." She answers. There's truth to that. If we wouldn't have both lived, there would be no rebellion in sight, Panem would go on, with the Capitol ruling, and maybe someday, way in the future, the districts would rebel, but it would've been too late.

We both stay silent for a while and browse through the rest of the pages. Then once we've seen the last page and all that's left are empty yellow parchment, Katniss closes the book. "Like my father, I have a lot more knowledge and there's a lot of stuff that isn't in here. I guess what I'm trying to say is, I can't draw these things and you can. I was wondering if you would like to help me?" She asks and her eyes plead for my help.

"Of course Katniss, I'd love to." She reached in and hugged me. I carried her up to her room and then we began.

We had a routine by the second day. I'd come in the morning with cheese-buns and I'd go up stairs and we would work on the book. Some she had samples of, some I already knew what they looked like, and some she'd have to use her words to show me, nonetheless I enjoyed it. There were no emotions or painful moments doing this. It was just Katniss and I doing something anybody would do.

One day I stop my work and look at her, she looks surprised when I stop my pencil and lift my eyes to her. "_You know,"_ I say, "_I think this is the first time we've ever done anything normal together."_

"_Yeah. Nice for a change." _Katniss and I had been through so many things together; so many things that could have broken us all the way, that could have left us insane, but we had each other. And sometimes it was nice to do things that wouldn't break us, something normal.

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**I hope you liked it! I really like this one, especially the part where they talk about nightlock. What was your favorite part in this chapter? Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	32. Chapter 32

**Here's the next chapter! I really like this one, guys! Enjoy! I do not own CF any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 32**

"Haymitch! She has to make it out alive! She has to!" I scream at him, his face unphased, his mouth around a bottle of liquor. It's has if he didn't fully understand, as if he hadn't been watching.

My mind goes back to only an hour before. Katniss looked so beautiful, had such a glow. I'm glad I watched it alone, I'm glad no one was there to see me throw that lamp. Every wedding dress was perfect on her, every last one, I never suspected tonight would be the announcement. I never expected that to be the outcome. It seemed too perfectly planned out. Those couldn't have been the words that were written on a piece of paper and put in that wooden box seventy-five years ago. It's too perfect a situation for the Capitol. Too perfect.

I was never alive during a Quarter Quell, but I heard in school that a few months before they tell everyone what it would be. The first one, each district had to pick it's own tributes, the second one twice as many kids went in, that's when Haymitch won. I listened to President Snow as he talked of the dark ages and the treaty of treasons and The Hunger Games. I listened carefully, wondering how I must mentor this year. What extra burden would they be adding to my already hated job?

Finally, it was the announcement, I sat my face practically touching the television, my heart beating a million beats per minute. I'm not sure I've ever been this anxious, not at the interviews, not coming up the tube, not even as I was about to eat those berries. Something was wrong, my body was telling me. "_And now we honor our third Quarter Quell."_ Says the cowardly President. A small boy, so innocent, yet so Capitol, steps forward. He wears an all white suit and carries a carefully crafted wooden box. "_On the seventy-fifth anniversary, as a reminder to the rebels that even the strongest among them cannot overcome the power of the Capitol, the male and female tributes will be reaped from their existing pool of victors."_

It took me one second. One second to realize that Katniss was going back in. That was certain. I had to go back with her, I had to. To keep her alive.

The phone rang and I'm not sure how long I let it go on before I stood up, threw a lamp across the room and walked to pick it up. I was surprised it was still ringing.

It was just breathing, deep and heavy and imperfect, it could only be Marcus.

"Don't come over. I need time." I said, before he had even got the strength to say something.

"Peeta. I took you for advantage. I need to see you. I need to see you now. If I wait you'll be gone too soon, and then I'll never get to see you again." He hadn't started crying yet, but in the way his voice shakes I hear it coming soon.

"Come later. Not now. Now isn't good." I hung up. It was really heartless of me, but I only had one thing in mind then, keeping Katniss alive. I know it will be hard we will all be victors, but they will be older, Katniss and I will be the youngest, we'll have an advantage. Haymitch and I needed to get started on a strategy now. At least if Katniss lives, she'll have something to live for.

I had left my house with in seconds. If Katniss was going to live we needed to be ready. So here I am at Haymitch's waiting him to say something, anything because as of now it's only been me yelling at him, trying to coax at least one single word out of him.

"Haymitch please," Now I've sat down, now my words have quieted, this was a serious matter, it needed to be handled. "She can't die. She doesn't deserve this."

"Do you think any of the other victors deserve this? Peeta we are all in the same boat. We all thought we were safe. How do think I'm taking this?" Haymitch has friends, friends who are victors, and he himself who is a victor as well. I didn't think of that. But still even with this, even though I know how everyone else must feel, Katniss still needs to live. We sit in silence for what seems likes hours, but is probably only minutes, seconds even. "Let me go in," Haymitch's words are quiet and calculated. It's something I would never expect from Haymitch Abernathy. Not at all.

"No, you've already done enough. You need to live the rest of your life. We need you as our mentor." It's the way things worked, Katniss and I fought for our lives and Haymitch helped us, any other situation is unthinkable.

"Peeta, she needs you. You may not think that, but—" He stops and takes a drink of his beer. "Fine, go in there with her. I don't think she'll stand for it." What must be going on in her head right now? Katniss was ready to die with me. Katniss was ready to die for me. Katniss might want to die for me again. No. That's not the Katniss I know. She will fight to get home to Prim. I know it.

"Haymitch if she dies, what can I live for?" The silence comes again, this time even longer, drawn out. Once the room becomes darker and Haymitch has moved onto another bottle I speak. "Will you help me again?"

"Sure kid. We promised we keep her alive a while ago, didn't we?" He pats my shoulder. "Go home. We'll talk later." He leaves me sitting at his table alone. Once he's gone and I can't even hear his footsteps any longer I get up and leave.

I see Marcus before he sees me. He sits on my porch, his head in his lap.

"I told you not to come." I say as I walk up the steps to unlock my door.

"I lost you once. I'm not going to lose you again. I refuse it. You're not going. Haymitch can go." He says behind me and I can practically hear the tear from his eyes dropping onto the floor.

"You never lost me the first time. I just went on a trip." I say, I never was lost.

"That may be true, but you changed, a lot. And I just got used to this new Peeta. This Peeta that isn't always cheerful, but still has love in his heart. I just got used to him and I liked him and I don't want to lose him too. I won't be able to take it." I never thought about it that way. About my family actually caring because there never was really any sign of it. But still with out Katniss, they still aren't enough.

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**I hope you liked it! Not gonna lie I almost cried when Marcus first called him, maybe I'm just a little emotional tonight, crying at my own writing and all. Anyways, just wanted to say I love all you Mockingjays! Even with your short sweet reviews, I love you guys. I haven't forgotten my Clovely's either, but you know my Mockingjays are a little more chatty ;). I really liked this chapter, I hope you did too! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	33. Chapter 33

**Here's the next chapter! WARNING: You might cry. Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire.**

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**Ch. 33**

"You're going to sacrifice yourself for her aren't you?" Marcus asks, his eyes look hollowed out: empty, he doesn't seem completely there.

"I have to." My house feels even emptier in these moments. I fear I'll lose Marcus before I'm even sent off to the Capitol again.

"Why Peeta? You could be happy without her. You know that, right?" He seems desperate; even he knows that's a lie.

"You've seen me without her being there, I was barely surviving. At least with me gone she'll be able to live. She has Gale and Prim, her mom. Me…" I pause and look at him searching for something that I would possibly want to live for with out Katniss, "I have nothing." I finish. His muscles clench, that must of hurt, somewhere, maybe in his heart or in his head, where ever it was, I see the pain in his eyes.

"What about your family Peeta?" He says. His eyes cling to my face like in one second I'll just disappear.

"What family? The family that wasn't there when I practically went insane? The family that didn't seem to care? Marcus, I didn't even know Rhys had a girl friend until last week. They've been dating for how long?" Marcus knows this; once I left I was practically disconnected from the family. I'm not even sure my mom remembers who I am.

"Don't say that Peeta. I was here. I stayed with you. For goodness sakes I had to hold you at two o'clock in the morning to calm you down!" His voice is now raised; we've all felt pain from the Capitol.

"Yeah, but what of the rest of the family? I'm not even sure they would attend my funeral." My words are harsh, almost cold-hearted, but I'm facing death in a few months, I have a reason.

"Peeta. Don't." Marcus turns his head away from me and looks out the window.

"Don't what? Speak the truth? Marcus I didn't feel wanted by you guys. I didn't feel like you were even proud to call me a Mellark. It's not my fault I was reaped. It's not my fault I'm damaged." I'd wanted to say something like that to my family for a long time, to tell them how abandoned I felt.

"You're not damaged." His voice is calm now, even somewhat level. His face comes back to me. Tears run down his cheeks. "I should have volunteered." These words are whispered and filled with what ifs.

"No, you don't say that. Marcus it's already happened. It was my fate to go into the Games, what done is done. We can't go back, not now, not ever." An argument between two brothers now has turned into a place of emotions and honest truth. He shakes his head, moving it softly into his hands.

"Peeta, you could've had a normal life. You deserve it. We all know you're the one with the best heart in our family. You would do anything for us and you would do even more for Katniss. If any of us deserve to live it's you." I deserve it. Sure, but life doesn't listen to who deserves it or who's the nicest or who lived the hardest life. It just happened. And maybe if Marcus would have volunteered—No I can't live like that. I can't live life with a bunch of what ifs.

"Marcus no one deserves this. No deserves to be put into the Hunger Games. No one. Not even the careers. That's why, please, once I'm gone—"

"Don't say that." He cuts me off his words slicing through mine. "I can't think about it yet."

"What'd you do when I went the first time?" I never thought I'd be saying that, the first time, I never thought there would be a second time to talk about.

"There was a possibility that you would come back. I hung onto that." That's why he came here today, a possibility. A possibility that maybe I could live. A reassurance that I could make it out alive.

"Marcus," I try to speak through my tears to let him know there is no possibility, none, Katniss is coming out alive, and I am going to do everything mortally possible to make that happen. Which meant I was dead. Gone. No possibility of life.

"Peeta. No," He shakes his head and tears fall down his face in uneven patterns, "don't say it. Please I'm not ready."

"Marcus, its months away." I say the thing that neither of us really wanted to mention. It was coming up. It wasn't far away. I'll be gone within months. Another forgotten tribute. Just what I always thought I'd be.

"I know." He says, although he doesn't seem like he knows and we sit in silence for a long time, each listening for our tears to stop and our hearts to keep beating. The house gets darker and I don't move to turn the lights on, it just doesn't seem right. A light in such a dark place would only cause more pain, more loss.

I was still coming to terms with my death. It's so imminent and scary and real. But once it hits me, that it will be coming, that I'll be dead, I feel almost peaceful. It's weird, I've come to terms with my death and I have no idea how, but I have. I feel relieved that I won't have to live in this horrible world anymore and free from all the dangers that President Snow has put on us. I don't feel so broken any more.

Finally my tears stop, I'm not sure why. Maybe it was the peace that came over me, or that quiet creeks in my house, but once the last tear dropped it was over.

"There is no possibility this time." I whisper, I'm not sure he heard it or if he was even listening for it, because he stays the same way he was before I said it. This time, louder, I say, "I'm going to die."

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**I hope you liked it! Sorry didn't meant to make you sad, but I mean it had to happen, you can't deny it. I hope you are crying! :,) Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	34. Chapter 34

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own CF any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 35**

"Peeta, stop don't do this for me. I don't deserve it." Katniss whispers, her hair is in a braid that swings, back and forth, back and forth. We stand on a ledge overlooking a drop miles long; a valley below is barely visible.

"Maybe you don't, but I want to Katniss. I can't live with out you." I whisper back. The ledge becomes smaller and smaller, or so it seems, and the bright sun shining up above our heads seems to become hotter as the seconds go on. If I squint my eyes hard enough I can see water, way down in that valley. It looks nice, peaceful.

"Peeta, don't. You have to live with out me. I'm such a horrible person." Now I'm sure the ledge is moving, my feet are beginning to hang over the edge. The sun is getting hotter as well, I feel like I'm being baked in an oven. Still, neither of us jump to our deaths, and I don't know why I don't just do it, until I see Katniss's hand holding me against the high mountain, my arm in turn is around her. We're back to the same exact predicament. Both of us die or one of us lives with out the other. Neither are ideal, but what in life really is?

"Katniss, I have lived my whole life, wanting you, needing you and I can't not…" I rethink my words, "I can't imagine a life with out you there." Katniss's face drops. Her eyes peruse the valley floor.

"But, I was so horrible to you. So, so horrible. I don't deserve this." She says it again and her words now echo.

"Do think either of us deserve this?" I swerve my head around.

Katniss shakes her head, tears have begun to fall from her eyes, "I'm sorry Peeta. I just, I can't." Then Katniss does the unthinkable, she shakes my arm off of her and falls, I close my eyes as if not to see her body hit the ground, but I do hear the impact, loud and lethal.

"Peeta, shhh, it's okay. It wasn't real." I thought I'd wake up to my brother's voice, the only other person in the house when I fell asleep, but instead it's a girls voice. Bright and cheerful, even in this hard broken moment, it could only be Delly.

"It could be real." I open my eyes and she stands above me. I had fallen asleep in the kitchen where I had been talking to Marcus, but I now lay on the couch, my head underneath a soft pillow.

"Do you want to tell me about it?" Delly moves and goes to sit down on one of the big chairs, she plops down gracefully.

"No, but thank you." I was used to nightmares, I could now come out of them in record time. Just a little reassurance that it wasn't real was all I needed. "Where's Marcus?"

"Oh, well, I came over early this morning to see you since, well," pause, "and Marcus was here and we talked for a little bit, but then your dad called. He left and he told me to tell you that he'd be back. So I waited until you woke up and you just started screaming and so I tried to calm you down and now we're here." She explains to me and lets out a big breath once she's finished.

I sit up and fold the blanket that I'm assuming Marcus put over me. Delly sits in the chair like it's too big for her and she looks very awkward. Finally she leans back and looks comfortable. "You're not coming back this time, are you?" I never thought Delly would accept my death before even Marcus did.

"Not with what I'm planning." I say serious. I'm going to do everything possible to let what happened in my dream not happen.

"I'll miss you." It's like we're saying goodbye, not for something final, but something small, insignificant. "This whole District will miss you." I smile at her words. I swear Delly could turn anyone's mood from good to bad. "Katniss is coming back though, right?" She looks up from her thumbs and into my eyes.

"Yes, Katniss will come back." It's not a maybe, it will happen. Katniss will come back. Katniss has to come back.

"I'd like to become her friend. Maybe we could be friends." This conversation seems strange, we're talking about something so serious, yet acting as if it's nothing, as if we'd been expecting it. "Do you want me to give her that painting?" She says, this time looking into my soul.

I never planned on Katniss seeing that painting, or even hearing of it, but maybe that would be nice. Maybe if she knew that I did see us together, that I did dream of a better tomorrow, maybe then she would get why I had to die for her. Because my only tomorrow involved Katniss, while like I realized only weeks ago, the man in the painting could as easily be Gale. Maybe Katniss could see, by just one look of the painting, that by me dying I was giving her a good luck wish, a wish for a better tomorrow.

I let out a low laugh, "Delly, I would love for you to do that. I just have to make a quick change. It will only take a second. There's bread in the cupboard, if you want any." I leave her alone and move to the closet that holds the painting; a closet of nightmares with one single dream that will never come true.

I find it way in the back behind a painting of a snarling wolf mutt, it's eyes brown and it's coat the same color, the mutt version of Thresh, and then just behind it lays my dream. Bright and colorful and full of new beginnings. I take it out of the dark closet and find my brown paint. It will only take two strokes, maybe one, that is all.

I move the brush over the boy's head. There, the choice is clear, one half of the boy's head is blonde, the other brown. Two totally different futures for Katniss and only one really possible, but still I did not want to completely give up on my dream. And though I know Katniss would never forget me, I want her to look at this painting way in the future and see the blonde part and think of me, of the times we've had together, hard and real and traumatizing, but ours. Of the times that I fell in love with her and the moments in our cave or on the train.

I hope she'll remember me and see what we could have been.

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**I hope you liked it! Sorry guys I did not mean to kill you with that last sentence, but I mean it had to be said. It kills me and I'm the one who wrote! Ahhh! Sorry, again. And sorry for not posting yesterday, it would have been a really bad chapter if I did post yesterday, I could not think straight for my life. So sorry, yet again. I'm just gonna let you guys wallow in your emotions now. Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	35. Chapter 35

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 35**

Once Delly's left with my giant painting in hand, I realize a few things. Katniss and I aren't in the shape we should be if we're working against other victors and Haymitch isn't the best mentor with a drink in hand. Besides it was about time he quit. Maybe it was a bit far-fetched to do this, but the supply that I had all went down the drain, and I needed to talk to Ripper, she can't sell to him anymore. Not now, not ever.

I hear the phone ring and walk away from the empty bottles to get it. "Peeta. It's me Mrs. Everdeen. I was just wondering how you were? Katniss didn't take the news too well." I can hear her sigh over the line. I can just see the lines of stress over her forehead get deeper.

"It definitely wasn't what I was expecting. Believe it or not I've taken it pretty well. What did Katniss do?" I ask.

"She went over to Haymitch's, got as drunk as he does. It was horrible, she never drinks." That's the last thing I want. For Katniss to turn into another Haymitch, for them to live their lives in complete sadness and torture only softened by a drink because of what happened to them. "I just don't want her to become a completely different in these last months." These last months.

"She'll be coming back. Don't worry." I say, and I'm sure in my words.

"Peeta." She doesn't say anything else, but maybe she gains some hope right there, "Well, I'll let you go." I hang up and make one more phone call. We needed to know our competition. Good thing everyone was already in past games. I call Effie and tell her to send over the tapes of all the living victors. We needed to be prepared.

Once I'm done talking to Effie, I leave to go find Ripper. She's actually easy to convince once I say that I'll turn her into the Peacekeepers if she does sell to Haymitch or Katniss and once I pay her off she's even easier. Haymitch now has no way of getting his liquor. All I had to do was go to his house and get rid of his remaining liquor. Katniss and him probably drank most of it last night anyways.

"Haymitch," I say with a nod as I walk past him and into his kitchen. He doesn't say a word as I root around through every drawer and cupboard. I doubt he knows what I'm doing. I'm sure if he did he would be blocking from where most of it sits. Which would make it easier to find, but it's got to be somewhere. I finally find it and four bottles of the stuff just sits there waiting to be drunk, but I let all the liquids into the sink. I watch as the clear stuff finds it's way down the drain.

Then I move upstairs because he has to have some up there, although I doubt he sleeps in his room much. But alas, I do find some, and down the drain all of that liquor goes as well. I hear some one come in as I look through the other rooms. Probably Katniss, which is perfect because I needed to talk to both of them.

Once I've gone through every room and every closet and I'm sure that I've found every bottle he has stored, I walk downstairs with a box of the empty bottles. It had a sense of finality to it. "_There it's done."_ I slam the box down onto the table in between Katniss and Haymitch.

"_What's done?"_ says Katniss. Haymitch seems to be out of sorts, he just stares at the box of empty bottles, not even comprehending what happened.

"_I've poured all the_ _liquor down the drain."_ I say back. This brings Haymitch out of what ever was going on.

"_You what?" _He says pawing through all the empty bottles.

"_I tossed the lot."_ I say.

"_He'll just buy more." _Answers Katniss, pushing aside my act as silliness.

"_No he won't. I tracked down Ripper this morning and told her I'd turn her in the second she sold to either of you. I paid her off, too, just for good measure, but don't think she's eager to be back in the Peacekeepers' custody." _Haymitch filled with anger comes at me with his knife, but it's in a drunken stupor and easy to deflect.

"_What business is it yours what he does?" _Katniss says. It's like they're in a team against me, when all I'm trying to do is make our team stronger.

"_It's completely my business. However it falls out, two of us are going to be in the arena again with the other as mentor. We can't afford any drunkards on this team. Especially not you Katniss." _My last sentence hurts her as she moves back away from me. I was not supposed to know that.

"_What? Last night's the only time I've ever even been drunk." _She spits out at me, but her words aren't convincing, the alcohol still has a hold on her.

"_Yeah, and look at the shape your in." _It's almost mean-hearted how I said it, but it needed to be said. I needed Katniss to come out alive and for her to do that, she needed a reality check. She needed to be the best she could be when we went into the Games.

Katniss turns to Haymitch clearly upset with me, "_Don't worry, I'll get you more liquor." _It's almost like a slap in the face to me, but it doesn't hurt too bad, I'm not sure where exactly she's going to get that said liquor.

"_Then I'll turn you both in. Let you sober up in the stocks,"_ I say just for extra measure.

"_What's the point to this?" _Says Haymitch, just wanting another bottle of his precious liquor.

"_The point is that two of us are coming home from the Capitol. One mentor and one victor. Effie's sending me recordings of all the living victors. We're going to watch their Games and learn everything we can about how they fight. We're going to put weight on and get strong. We're going to start acting like Careers. And one of us is going to be victor again whether you two like it or not!" _I leave the house quickly with a loud bang of the door.

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**I hope you liked it! I have been horrible this week, I didn't post on two different days. Sorry! I just haven't been motivated to write, so give me some motivation? Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	36. Chapter 36

**Here's the next chapter!**** Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire.**

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**Ch. 36**

All three of us Victors get into routine; running, training, throwing knives, learning snares, and finally learning about our competition. Katniss and I become stronger and faster and thicker filled with muscles. Everyone helps us. Katniss's mom has us on a strict diet to put meat on, Prim helps us with our sore muscles, and even Gale joins in to help us with snares. This is working out well; even Haymitch's beer belly has begun to flatten out.

My favorite part of the whole thing is watching the old Games. It's not that I enjoy watching the Games, it's nice to know our competition before we even go in though. There's Annie Cresta, the girl I saw sitting next to Finnick on the victory tour. She looks aware and full of life when the Games first start. Then things go wrong, her district partner killed right in front of her. You see her almost go crazy right there. But she had one thing none of the others had; the will to survive. And of course knowing how to swim, but it was there in her eyes, even after they had gone insane, you could see it, you could believe it; she was going to win.

Then there's Mags in one of the earlier Games, she had to be at least eighty now, but here watching her games, she's strong and independent and beautiful. Her thick brown hair hangs in a ponytail as she fights against the different tributes. Her fighting is clean and proficient. It was obvious from the start that she would win, I wonder if she knew that.

"There's no way, she'll be in it. I mean can she even walk anymore?" Asks Katniss, once Haymitch told us the year of these games. I know for one she definitely won't be fighting the same way.

"Crazier and crueler things have happened," is all Haymitch answers back with. He was right, it was all the remaining Victors, whether they are barely living or had children, whoever was reaped was going in. That was certain. I found Haymitch closing his eyes a lot as we watched fellow victors fight in their Games. They are his friends. This is a horrible thing that is happening.

Late at night, once we're done watching past Games, Haymitch and I talk; talk about saving Katniss. He's told me her plan, to keep me alive, he says he's been just playing along. I just hope I'm not the one that's being played by both of them.

"What's your reasoning for keeping her alive again?" asks Haymitch late into the night, probably early into the next morning. The reaping was coming up and we were in the best condition we've ever been in. Now was the time to begin really planning things out.

"I won't have anything to live for with out her. She does." Saying it so many times, I realize it's partially selfish of me. But really in all honesty it's not. Prim needs Katniss. Katniss's mom needs Katniss. People need her. People do not need me.

"Then you have to convince her to live. You're the only one that can really do it." Haymitch says and we set together on a plan. The next day I go get a picture of Mrs. Everdeen and Prim, and because I had to, a picture of Gale from Hazelle Hawthorne. These pictures were my District token. They were going to show Katniss that there is life beyond me. That she will live.

The rest of the spare time that I do have, I spend with my family. Who I realized it wasn't only their fault that I had drifted away from them, it was mine as well. I had been so caught up in my own sorrow, that I didn't realize Rhys was in love, or that Marcus wanted to further his education, or that my mom, yes my mom, had begun to be nicer. I shouldn't have ever put all the blame on them.

Rhys was planning to propose to his girlfriend, Sky, who in all accounts was simple, but perfect for Rhys. Her build was small and her intelligence the same, but she would have a wonderful life with my brother. They'd probably take over the bakery when my dad gets too old and have children. I'll regret never meeting their family, but hopefully they'll know who I was and what I did for love.

Marcus, who was so nice to only listen to my problems, that he never told me of his dreams. He wanted to teach. Children. Which was wonderful for Marcus he was always so amazing with children when they came into the bakery. I'll regret never being able to send my children off to their Uncle Marcus's class, but I know I'll stay in his heart.

My mom and dad, always so quiet and standoffish were beginning to come out of their shells. My dad had started to joke with the costumers, and my mom had even begun to talk to the costumers. I wasn't the only one that had changed over the past year, my whole family had as well.

The reaping comes; it's time to leave. And even though I know I will get to say goodbye to my family later, I go by the bakery in the morning anyways. I wish Rhys and Sky the best of luck in their marriage. And I say a tearful goodbye to Marcus. And I could see it, a small tear in my mom's eye. They all knew there was no possibility of me coming back this time. I was gone for good.

At the reaping the two large reaping bowls sit the same size they are every year. The girls' sits with one slip, I could barely even see it in there. Then the boys' with two slips. If Haymitch's name were to be called by Effie's high shrill voice, I would volunteer. Effie waves her hand around in the large bowl containing Katniss's name, finally she finds the slip. Katniss walks up to the stage. Then Haymitch is called, but like planned I volunteer. I feel my pocket for the picture before I step up onto the stage. There are no goodbyes; we are taken straight to the train.

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**I hope you liked it! I know I'm a horrible person, I'm making his families futures look bright and then, well, you guys know what happens. Sorry! Don't forget to REVIEW On the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	37. Chapter 37

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics. (italics are also used for emphasis in this chapter.)**

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**Ch. 37**

Katniss and I stand at the window watching as our home disappears. For me this is the last time I will ever see it. I'm not even sure if Katniss realizes I stand not two feet away from her. Her hand sits right where her heart must be beating and her eyes contain the tears that are threatening to fall. The train moves too fast away from my home, away from the people that have surrounded me all my life.

It's not until now that I remember the thoughts of rebellion that I had weeks ago before the announcement of the Quarter Quell. Now what am I doing? Once again conforming to what the Capitol wants. They want me dead. They've wanted me dead since the moment Claudius Templesmith announced with his loud booming voice that Katniss and I were the victors. I was fighting to get Katniss home to _this_, the place that flashes before my eyes in a matter of seconds. A place of suffering for most. A place of loss for a lot. And now with the new Head Peacekeeper, a place of fear for all. I don't want Katniss living in this for the rest of her life. If she was going to have a life with Gale I wanted it to be a full one. Not a life where she fears to have children. Of course, it was now all too late. I could not work on a plan for a rebellion while being sent off to slaughter.

Which leads me to another thought. Victors are what keeps this country out of utter chaos. It was the one reason Marcus gave him self when I left; the possibility. If there was no possibility that one of the tributes could come home there would be no one fighting in the Games. Victors put a little tiny bit of hope in all of us. By the Capitol killing off Victors they will probably be adding more flames to the fire that Katniss and I started. Did they understand that? Did they understand that this was the worst Quarter Quell that could happen right now?

I leave Katniss to stand at the window once I no longer see the houses. Home is gone, I can't really think about it any longer. I know why Katniss stands there. Her goodbyes were saved for within the Justice Building. I was sad about that as well. They couldn't at least give us that? I had wanted to talk to Delly and Marcus without the ears of the rest of my family. I can only think of what Katniss would want to say to Prim, Gale, or her friend Madge, the mayors daughter. Forever left in her mind because of some unnecessary order President Snow probably gave.

I watch Katniss from behind. She stands still, her hand still up on her heart and her shoulders slumped slightly. I knew her plan, in her head she wasn't coming back, if only she knew. If only she knew the life I have dreamed for her to have. If only she knew what went on inside my head when she looked at me and I saw somewhere deep down inside her bright grey eyes the joy of that little kindergartner who sang the Valley song on the first day of school. If only she knew how deep my feelings went for her. If only she knew how many times my heart had stopped because of the way she looked at me or the way her words came steady out of her mouth or in the many time she kissed me. If only she knew how horribly I felt that I could not have a life with her. If only she knew.

After awhile I finally stand up and walk back over to her, she has now finally dropped her hand from her heart. "_We'll write letters, Katniss. It will be better, anyway. Give them a piece of us to hold on to. Haymitch will deliver them for us…if they need to be delivered." _Katniss looks up from the scenery outside. Her eyes catch on my face for just a second, but then she looks away and gives me a slight nod. She walks around me to her room.

I listen to my own advice and leave to write letters. I write one to each of my family members, Delly, Prim, and even surprisingly Gale. His is short, but real:

Dear Gale,

I know you would never think you would see a letter from me, but I know you love her. Part of me knows she would have chose you and the other part won't let myself believe it. But obviously, fate has decided something else for me. Love her. Love her as much as I would. Give her what ever she wants, let her be her stubborn self, take care of her, but what ever you do, love her. I know you will.

With loss,

Peeta.

I sign the letter with a shaky hand. I knew I was signing off my dreams, my hopes, but I knew it had to be done. I will always be apart of Katniss. Gale needs to know that, but I don't want it to stop them from having life. It seemed wrong. Finally once I've finished with every one I can think of I start with Katniss's, at first no words come, but then once they do they begin to flow.

Dear Katniss,

I know you wanted me to live, but you have something to live for. You have people to live for; you have people who _need_ you. Prim, the one you started this whole thing for, she _needs _you. You can deny it or push it out of your mind, but it's true. You know it is. Gale_ needs_ you. You are his best friend. I saw you two when he was healing, he loves you and Katniss you love him. You cannot deny it. Your mom _needs _you. I never really knew what happened after your dad died, but I've heard things, she'll do it again. Dying for me is selfish Katniss, it is better this way.

I'm sorry I wasn't there those first couple months after the Games. I should have been there. I never realized that in the midst of needing you, you probably needed me as well. We can't deny the everlasting connection we had. You don't come close to death with some one and then forget about them. If you never forgive for not being there, that's okay.

I wanted a life with you. I did. I'll regret never getting to have one with you. The worst part is. I've imagined it. Our kids, our holidays, our wedding, us with gray hairs, I've thought about all of it. Our life in my dreams was pretty good, but I know if you try hard enough you can have the same thing with Gale. Like I said before you love him. You two will have a wonderful life.

One request, please never forget me. I will always love you.

With everlasting love,

Peeta.

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**I hope you liked it! More emotional stuff, I know sorry, if it makes you feel better I was almost crying when I wrote it... Okay, umm Mockingjays? Do you not like being Mockingjays? Because people aren't reviewing anymore, and I don't know what's going on. Please it doesn't have to be every chapter, but just a check-in every once in awhile would be appreciative. Thank-you! Also I re-wrote the first chapter of The Fate Games because well lets just say it wasn't my best work, believe it or not this has really made me a better writer. Thank you guys for that! So if you want to check that out, that would be awesome! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~Boywithbreadlover**


	38. Chapter 38

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire any direct quotes will be italicized.**

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**Ch. 38**

At dinner we all sit quietly. This isn't the way it's supposed to be. Whether we realized it or not Katniss, Haymitch, Effie, and I have become a very closely knit team. And although, I don't like many Capitol, Effie, I did like. She was the least bit annoying in the beginning and she always said the worst things at the worst times, but she was Effie and I know deep down way in that hard Capitol heart of hers she loved us.

We all say nothing as the train moves along and more dishes of food are brought out to us. It wasn't supposed to be like this. Katniss and I were not supposed to be tributes again. This scene was all too familiar. I try to talk, and Effie does to, but it always dies out. Effie wears a new wig and finally, I get at least somewhere with a conversation starter, "_I love your new hair, Effie." _It's gold no longer the bright obnoxious orange it was on the Victory tour.

"_Thank you. I had it especially done to match Katniss's pin. I was thinking we might get you a golden ankle band and maybe find Haymitch a gold bracelet or something so we could all look like a team." _I did need a token to hold the picture of Katniss's mom and Prim and the picture of Gale. Obviously an anklet wouldn't be ideal, but maybe a golden locket would work.

"_I think that's a great idea. How about it, Haymitch?"_ I was trying to get him to realize that this was just what we needed. He doesn't listen much though; something is distracting him. He's probably never been on a train sober before.

"_Yeah, what ever." _He murmurs, it's barely audible.

"_Maybe you could get a wig, too," _Katniss tries to make a joke, but Haymitch doesn't even look like he heard it really. We sit in silence for the rest of the meal, but we're eating dessert so it's not much longer.

"_Shall we watch the recap of the reapings?" _asks Effie once the servers have cleared the table and the only evidence that we just ate was in our stomachs. I leave to get a notebook that I had kept of all the living victors, now we will know our real competitors and how they fight.

I watch as the reapings play out, they are almost the exact same as they are each year, only more sorrowful. These people being reaped and walking out onto the stage are devoid of the innocence of the usual tributes. They're innocence was lost the second they're plate locked up into place and they stared at the cornucopia. These people stepping up onto the stages have lives, some have even got married, had children, their lives were supposed to be protected. I feel the sorrow that they must feel, this same exact thing has happened to me.

Haymitch looks sick as his fellow mentors, his only friends step onto the stage. This would be hard for everyone, but especially those who were not reaped. The Victors all knew each other; some even had special relationships with each other.

The reaping at District Four is one of the hardest to watch. The girl first called is none other than the girl that grabbed my attention while watching her games, Annie Cresta. She looks sicker and more lost than what I saw on the Victory Tour. This girl was even more broken than the rest of us. I could barely hear the calls of some one volunteering. She no longer looks like the strong girl that was destined to win in her games, she's brittle and old and walks with her back in a curl, it's Mags. Old and haggard, but brave and strong and kind enough to volunteer for the Victor more harmed than the rest of us. Finnick is the male tribute reaped, and the thing that kills me the most is that as the camera moves away from the crowd of District Four, I can barely see Annie in the crowd, but her face shows what mine must've shown when Katniss volunteered last year. The face of lost hope.

I look down into my notebook before Katniss or Effie look at my face, I put a star next to Finnick and then next to Mags. I look at the description next to Mags's name: To old to know anymore. That is all I put. I quickly right next to that small description; selfless.

I watch as the rest of the reapings play out, Victor after Victor called as Effie lets out small gasps of sadness about each person. Victors were near and dear to the hearts of the Capitol people. Like I said, it's going to be a hard year for everyone.

Another thing kills me, it's in Eight; the name called out, Cecelia. I remember watching her games, she wasn't the favored person in fact nobody would think that she'd be the one to win until the last battle when she stabbed the sword into her opponent. She was strong and she was definitely fighting to get home to something. But now that something has multiplied, children grasp their mother as she fights her way up to the stage. She fights tears, but they still come. This was horrible. Sickening. Devastating. These children will live with out their mother for something so stupid. For something so useless. For somebody so power-hungry he does this for his own entertainment. Snow needed to be taken down. I'm just not sure how it will happen.

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**I hope you liked it! Thank you all for the wonderful reviews! Now if you could just do that with out me having to remind you. And just so you know, you do not need an account to review! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	39. Chapter 39

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I don't own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics. (Peeta does have a daydream in this chapter and I did use italics, those are not Suzanne's perfect words, but mine. But there are direct quotes that are in italics like always. Don't get too confused :)**

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**Ch. 39**

Haymitch leaves right after the reapings conclude. Effie stay for only a couple minutes and whispers her comments on the victors going in once again as tributes. I don't think she's actually talking to Katniss and I, just practicing what she will say when we get to the Capitol. If she was talking to us, I wasn't listening; instead I tear out the pages of the Victors lucky enough to not be reaped again.

Once Effie's gone I expect Katniss to get up, but she doesn't. I feel her eyes boring into me, but I don't dare look up. There is something special in the moments that Katniss and I have in complete silence. It takes all of my being to not talk to her; if I only have so long on this earth left with her I want every moment to be spent with her. Right now isn't the time to talk it seems and since she doesn't speak, I don't either. I would really like to lay out the words written in my letter, it'd be best if she actually heard the words from me before reading them.

As I tear out page after page, I lose myself in a daydream.

"_I know your plan," I would say, my hands would stop working and my eyes would meet up with hers. Her face would show shock, disbelief, maybe even fear. _

_ "My plan," She'd whisper, she'd hide her face away from mine, her hair now down would only conceal her lost look. _

_ "You want me to live." She'd look back up and anger would show on her face. Anger that Haymitch had told her. Anger that I knew. _

_ "Peeta don't—" I'd cut her off as she tried to explain her crazy plan to me. _

_ "Katniss, I can't live with out you. You have people to live for people who need you. Don't you think dying for me would be selfish? Please just let me do this one small thing for you." _

_ "Small? Peeta this isn't small. It's your life." She'd pause and look away again her eyes looking as if they'd never seen my face before. I wouldn't say anything. I'd know she'd want to say something else. I'd wait for those words to come. "Maybe I can't live without you." They'd be slow and thought out and dangerous words to Katniss. Maybe she wouldn't even venture out to say them. _

_ "You can. You did it before." I would say thinking of the darkness after the games. I'd think about it again, I'd stop her before she said sorry. I was the one that needed to say it, "No I take that back. That was my fault. I should have put my heart behind me and been your friend. I never thought that in the midst of needing you, you'd need me as well. I'm sorry." Katniss probably wouldn't say much else, she'd probably leave minutes after. At least she'd know what I thought. _

I'm not sure why I don't say something. It's what I want, but then another part doesn't, another part screams at me that she would only want to keep me alive more. She can't know of my plan or how real it really was. Instead when I've ripped out all of the pages and she still stares at me, I look up and say, "_Why don't you get to sleep?" _I'm not sure I can make it much longer in the silence with her.

"_What are you going to do?"_ She asks, just wanting to do the same exact thing I want to do; to stay with each other. We can't do that. I can't have this small piece of our lives that we could have together and die knowing it would have been a good life, definitely not perfect, but there would be happy days and there would be broken days, but we would have each other and the steady beating of our hearts. I can't have that.

"_Just review my notes awhile. Get a clear picture of what we're up against. But I'll go over it with you in the morning." _Her eyes show none other than the fear of sleep. I know that my nightmares have come back with full force and seeing her now they must've came back to her as well. "_Go to bed, Katniss." _I would love to welcome her into my arms, to feel her heart beating with mine, to know that there is a bleak future, but right now, right here, there is nothing more that matters than being with each other. No. I can't have that; I can't have those feelings. I want them, so bad, but I can't.

Katniss's eyes plead with mine for about a second before she turns and leaves. I could call out to her, she could turn around and come back, we could spend these last couple weeks together, actually together, it might be nice, it might be perfect, it might be just what I need. I can't think straight for what must be minutes as I think of how nice it would be to just be with Katniss. To forget my death and the horrible Capitol and President Snow's threats, and just be there, together. It might be even close to normal if we just lived in the moment.

Once I come out of my small time of weakness I know it's too late to go get her, she might have even already fallen asleep. I go find the tapes of the past Hunger Games, it was time to re-watch the games, we needed to know exactly what we were up against. I start with Finnick. I remember when he won, he was young, but he was destined to win and with his good looks he had plenty of sponsors. There was always some sort of special on him each year when the games rolled around. I never thought he had any real substance, always "falling" in love with multiple Capitol women each year, but by the way Annie looked at him, there had to be something in him, something more than the charmer of the man the Capitol made him out to be.

I almost fall asleep when I hear some one come into the room. I get up from the couch and see Katniss. She looks frightened, still somewhat in a nightmare. I still see the innocent face of the girl before the Games found her and I. I can't turn her away right now, not with the way she looks. Only hours ago I wanted to spend every moment I had with her, and now I don't want to in fear it will be too hard for me? I have to die either way, and it'd be better to spend the rest of my life with Katniss anyways. It's what both of us needed. "_Couldn't sleep?"_ I say.

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**I hope you liked it! How did you feel about this chapter? Did it confuse you? Was it good writing? Tell me what you think and don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	40. Chapter 40

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own CF any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 40**

For a second I forget all about where we are and why we're standing here. I just see Katniss standing there, scared and broken and exactly the person the games left her, dependent. I don't see the point in not having her be mine anymore. I don't see the point in not being there for each other in the hardest moments of our lives. So I open my arms, I welcome Katniss into them.

I don't think it would matter if we were in the middle of a burning building, being in each others arms was exactly where we were meant to be. It was like I was recharging, instead of sleep giving me energy, Katniss's heart does. I bury my face in her deep dark hair and find her neck; I gently set my lips against it, quietly letting her know that I am here. I'm not sure I'll ever be able to let go of her because if I do, the world outside once again becomes a reality.

This is not acting; this is just us, with each other, behind the scenes of Peeta Mellark and Katniss Everdeen. These few moments aren't filled with forced laughter or senseless kissing, but something so real and tangible I could almost touch it. These moments are none other than perfect. Sure there's the past in our heads, the nights spent with out each other, the warm nights on the train, the threats of President Snow, but all of that is almost forgotten as we stand with each other.

I think we might have stood like this until the train stopped and we were forced to get off, but we don't get that long when a Capitol attendant comes in with warm milk. His eyes searches our faces with pity as he sets the milk down, "_I brought an extra cup." _

Katniss looks better and I'm sure I do to as we stand separately away from each other now. I really want to close the small empty space between us, but the attendant still stands there. "_Thanks." _Katniss says.

"_And I added a touch of honey to the milk. For sweetness. And just a pinch of spice," _He stands there awkwardly for a second as he contemplates saying something, but then he just shakes his head and leaves the room. The only thing that I could read across his face was pity. Is this Quarter Quell what it took for the Capitol people to realize it was wrong?

"_What's with him?"_ Katniss asks her face filled with confusion.

"_I think he feels bad for us,"_ I say remembering his face from only seconds ago.

"_Right." _Katniss begins to pour the milk.

"_I mean it I don't think the people in the Capitol are going to be all that happy about our going back in or the other victors. They get attached to their champions."_ I say because Katniss's voice was laced with felt wrong to believe that Capitol people had any feelings other than happiness, but way deep down under that dyed skin and make-up there was a heart beating. They liked the victors, everyone knew their names and when they got married and every few years there would be a special on each victor. Victors were near and dear to the Capitol's heart.

_ "I'm guessing they'll get over it once the blood starts flowing," _Katniss's voice has no emotion in it, if the Capitol people didn't feel anything about it Katniss was going to match it. We couldn't feel bad for the Capitol people because they were sad we were dying. If Cato had won Katniss and I would be forgotten, we would not have any pity felt for us. "_So you're watching all the tapes again?"_ Katniss asks, moving along to a different topic.

"_Not really. Just sort of skipping around to see people's different fighting techniques." _I say.

"_Who's next?"_ Katniss asks. I pick up the box of tapes and hold it out to her.

"_You pick." _Katniss digs around and she doesn't stop until she finds one on the very bottom. I have a feeling I know what one she'll pull out. I put it at the bottom for a reason. Of course she pulls it out, the name written across the side; Haymitch Abernathy.

"_We never watched this one." _She says her voice full of curiosity. I almost watched it a few weeks back, when I was home alone and I was just so curious. What made Haymitch the way he is today? I decided against watching it.

I shake my head at Katniss, it would feel wrong to watch it, "_No. I knew Haymitch didn't want to. The same way we didn't want to relive our own Games. And since we're all on the same team, I didn't think it mattered much." _

_ "Is the person who won the twenty-fifth in here?"_ She asks. I know what she's getting at. We need to watch a Quarter Quell.

"_I don't think so. Whoever it was must be dead by now, and Effie only sent me victors we might have to face." _I have Haymitch's tape in my hand. It tempts me. Katniss has a good point; we've never seen a Quarter Quell. We need to see how they work. "_Why? You think we ought to watch it?"_

_ "It's the only Quell we have. We might pick up something valuable about how they work." _This felt wrong, like we were children rationalizing on why we stole the candy. The only reason we want to watch it is too see what nightmares meet Haymitch each night, that still come to him twenty-five drunken years later. The Quell this year will be much different than this one, but we still need a reason to watch it. If Haymitch finds out… "_We don't have to tell Haymitch we saw it." _This reminds me of the time Marcus and I were alone in the bakery, we ate a dozen cookies. That was Marcus's exact word except instead of Haymitch it was mom and instead of saw it was ate. This felt so childish, but I was curious. I needed to know.

"_Okay,"_ I agree.

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**I hope you liked it! Sorry I didn't post for two days! You guys were so review-y this week too, I just needed a tiny break, so thanks for giving it to me! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	41. Chapter 41

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own CF any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 41**

The second Quarter Quell was brutal. Katniss and I don't skip through the reapings to go straight to the games, or fall asleep as the many kid's names are being called out; we watch our eyes glued to the screen. My heart aches as I watch double the kids walk up to the stage, as I see double the families mourning. What the worst part is, is knowing the outcome. I know all these children are gone, all these children forever frozen at the age they died at. It's horrible.

Once we reach The District Twelve reapings, my heart aches, I never knew these children, but I feel connected to them. I know what they felt, what they saw as they left their districts and went to the world of the Capitol, and the small hope that coursed through their veins. It pains me to know that they never got a chance to live, that they never fell in love or wanted children, that they never experienced this hard yet worth it thing called life.

The first name called out, "_Maysilee Donner!"_ Katniss reacts almost instantly. "_Oh! She's was my mother's friend." _My eyes go straight to three girls. One of them so recognizable, but so much younger, Katniss's mom, beautiful and full of life, except now her face shows the same stress that usually shows nowadays.

"_I think that's your mother hugging her,"_ I see how my father fell so easily. Katniss got her beauty from her mother, there was no doubt there.

"_Madge," _Katniss gasps. The face of the other girl clinging to Maysilee looks so much like Katniss's friend Madge, there's no doubt it's her mother.

"_That's her mother. She and Maysilee were twins or something. My dad mentioned it once," _In all honesty, he had mentioned it more than once. He talked of Katniss's mom a lot before I went into the Games, and of course never when my mom was there, but she was mentioned on long nights in the bakery or early Saturday mornings often. Of course he told me of her best friends and how he longed for the days he could be with her. Whenever I asked him why it didn't happen, he would turn away, look out the window and whisper three simple words, "She got away," then later, after minutes in silence he would always with out a doubt say, "But I love your mother." I know he said it more to reassure himself than to me. I knew my parents loved each other; it was just in a different way.

Katniss doesn't say anything else as we hear the next girl's name called out. She's unrecognizable; I wonder where her family is now? Haymitch is called; he's young and strong and does not yet have the haunted look in his eyes. He doesn't have years of pain and loss and alcohol underneath his skin. Right here he's just a kid from the seam, unknown and unbroken.

"_Oh Peeta, you don't think he killed Maysilee, do you?"_ Katniss lets out, it's rushed and full of fear.

"_With forty-eight players? I'd say the odds are against it." _ I answer.

We watch silently as the rest of his games play out. I don't know why I don't get tired, I should be tired, but I'm not. I watch, my eyes wide open practically glued to the screen. The games begin, the landscape absolutely breathtaking. All of the kids stare at the landscape in awe of its perfect beauty, no one knows what terrors the land holds. All the animals seem to have a vengeance for the tributes, with crazy squirrels and scary birds, this place of beauty is a hidden nightmare. Haymitch ends up allying with Maysilee, they walk to the edge of the arena, that's where they break up. Haymitch throws something off the edge of the arena and to his surprise it bounces back up. That's when you hear the screams of Maysilee. I bet these screams meet Haymitch often at night, I'm sure the birds that killed her are why he holds a knife. Haymitch doesn't cry or loose him self as the last drops of life leave Maysilee's body, but his face shows it all, agony, pain, regret of not staying with her. Then something else shows across his face as the cannon fires, relief, relief of not being the one to kill her, relief that maybe he could make it home.

It comes down between Haymitch and girl from District One, their fight is brutal and hard to watch and I'm surprised that even the Capitol doctors could keep Haymitch alive. His intestines threaten to come out, and I'm sure the Capitol people thought she would win, but Haymitch staggers towards the edge of the arena, the girl flings a giant ax at him, but instead of killing him, it flies over the edge. The girl doesn't look like she cares much that she's weaponless, if it came down to who could survive longer, it would be her, but instead of her ax just falling to the ground, it comes back up. She's dead in seconds, and Haymitch close to the end of his life is pronounced Victor of the 50th annual Hunger Games.

I get up in silence and turn the tape off; the room is dark and filled with wordless thoughts. I don't say anything. Katniss doesn't say anything. We sit in silence and realize how much Haymitch goes through each day. We knew he was a Victor, we just didn't know to what extent. There was a thin line between knowing Haymitch was a Victor, and actually _knowing_ Haymitch was a Victor. Seeing the nightmares that must haunt him each night and the countless regrets he must have.

Was this why the Capitol harmed him? Because he used their force field, for something it was not supposed to be used for? How stupid of a reason to harm someone's family, someone's life. To the Capitol it was valid, but they ruined a mans life, didn't they already do enough?

The force field that surrounded the arena reminded me of the thing they had over the training center, so the tributes won't try to kill themselves before going into the Games. Finally I speak up after the silence has stretched before us for what seems like miles, "_That force field at the bottom of the cliff, it was like the one on the roof of the Training Center. The one that throws you back if you try to jump off and commit suicide. Haymitch found a way to turn it into a weapon." _ I say the obvious, but it felt like something needed to be said, anything.

"_Not just against the other tributes, but the Capitol too." _Says Katniss. Haymitch had outsmarted the "others" just as we had done, "_You know they didn't expect that to happen. It wasn't meant to be part of the arena. They never planned on anyone using it as a weapon. It made them look stupid that he figured it out. I bet they had a good time trying to spin that one. Bet that's why I don't remember seeing it on television. It's almost as bad as the berries!" _Katniss, becomes hysterical, her laughter fills the train car and floats around beautifully. I'm not sure why she is, but it releases the tension in the small room. I only shake my head at Katniss, and of course I can't help but smile.

"_Almost, but not quite." _I whip around to see Haymitch, a bottle in hand; obviously being on a train filled with so much alcohol was too hard. I don't know what I expect from him, anger? No not anger, but betrayal maybe. But he doesn't seem to care; he even gives a little smile. He knew all of our demons; maybe it's best if we knew his as well.

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**I hope you liked it! So sorry, I didn't post yesterday! I give you permission to yell at me! Sorry! I promise to be a better author this week and try to post everyday and if I don't you can yell at me! :) Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	42. Chapter 42

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire.**

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**Ch. 42**

I don't listen to my prep team as they work on me. Their chatter is unimportant and I long for the moments when Portia will walk in and take their place. They seem to know I don't like them much, that I don't like to respond to their questions and that their silly banter annoys me. Unlike Katniss, who although I know her prep team annoys her, she actually seems to like them.

To my surprise Portia walks in before my prep team is even finished, "You can leave. I'll finish what you haven't." The prep team scatters, getting out of there with in a matter of seconds. Once they're gone and the door is closed behind them, Portia's face instantly drops. I even see a tear begin to fall. She begins to run towards me, she envelopes me in her warmth. I knew I missed Portia I guess I just didn't realize how much I needed a hug from her.

"Their cruel Peeta, cruel." She whispers into my ear, it's so quiet I doubt the many things they have hidden in here to spy could even pick it up. I hear her breath become louder in my ear and I feel her tears wet my hair. I never thought I would be this close to a Capitol person, but I am and besides Portia is not like the Capitol at all.

"Hey, shh, you'll remember me, right?" I hold her close to me. I know I should be the one being comforted, but I really don't want to be. It feels good to be the comforter for once.

"That's not enough Peeta. It isn't supposed to be like this. Your supposed to get married, have kids. Cinna and I would come visit every year, and then one year we'd just stay and we could actually be happy. All of us. We deserve it. A normal happy life." I would be lying if I said I'd never thought those thoughts. In all honesty I thought about them everyday, almost every second. I know we don't deserve this, but I can't change it. I'm going to die, it's certain.

"I know Portia, but it's happened. I'm not leaving that arena alive again, but Katniss is. Just remember me." I utter those last three words quietly and without another thought. I knew she could never forget me. We had bonded a lot, our conversation was always easy, I think I could trust her with almost anything.

She let's go and looks into my eyes for a second, "How could I forget you? You won over the heart of the whole country, including mine. I'm really glad I got to know you." She pauses think about something for a second, "When I first was offered this job I was just like the rest of them, I mean I was always different, but I just thought of the children as tributes, not children, but tributes. Then I met Cinna, and he didn't, he saw all of you as people and by the time I met you that's what I thought as well. I never thought I'd get this close to one of my tributes, but I did. I thought you would live, I never thought we'd be going through this again."

She looks away for a second and then back at me, her face is now wiped of tears and no new ones fall to replace the old ones. She gets to work on me; her face shows no emotion as she works, just concentration. After minutes of silence she looks up, "How has the last couple months been? I'm sorry I didn't write much."

The last couple months had almost been painless, but only almost. There was still the saying goodbye to my family, and the letting go of my dreams with Katniss, and the farewell to my District. But mostly it was just training, working harder, knowing more. I didn't think much of my past or my future, but right then. And right then, what I needed to do was get myself ready for the Games, "Just training." I answer and then because that didn't sound personal at all I add, "My brother got engaged."

Portia looks up from my nails, "Oh yeah? Marcus or Rhys?" She tries to smile; it's actually a pretty valid try.

"Rhys." I answer. She looks back at my nails and her face goes back into concentration. We sit in silence, this isn't usual. Usually our conversations are endless, but with my end so near, neither of us can think of anything to say.

Later when Portia has moved to my hair, she begins to speak, "This is my last year as a stylist. I told them months ago." Her words aren't strained and sad which is surprising. What seems like ages ago Portia had told me of her dream of being a stylist ever since she was a child, how one day she just knew that was what she was going to be. I wonder why she gave up on her biggest dream.

"Why?" I asked, my voice full of shock.

"I want to move to District Twelve. I mean sure being a stylist is my passion, but so is that. If I stay here, I'll just be getting involved like this again, creating relationships that will only end with a death or if I don't want that I'll be working on the people that cheer on the deaths of children. I can't do that. It's not who I am." People from the Capitol rarely moved to the Districts and when they did it was because they were Peacekeepers. I don't think any one has ever moved to District Twelve willingly.

"What would you do in District Twelve?"

"Oh, well I have enough money to live there with out working, but if I want to keep my hands busy, I thought I could help with weddings. Make the brides looks beautiful." She pauses her hands and looks at me, "Maybe I could help your brother and his bride."

"She would look amazing with your touch. I wish I could see it." I almost don't say the last sentence. It's the first time I've ever uttered one of my regrets out loud. I've never told anyone how horribly I feel that I'll never see Rhys's kids, or how badly I feel that I'll never be able to send my kids to Marcus's classroom, or how awful I feel that I'll never have a future with Katniss. Portia looks at me with sorrow; the words almost hurt her to hear them as much as they hurt me to say them. Portia was right; I didn't deserve this. But I was also right; there was nothing I could do to stop it.

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**I hope you liked it! This chapter was supposed to be up like an hour earlier and then my computer freaked, so I had to re-write it! Truly sorry, it's up so late. Hey LEF, I gave Peeta a hug from Portia for you! And the person named Gabe who wanted to e-mail me, sorry I don't give out my e-mail, but if you want to tell me you can create an account on here (it's really simple) and Private Message me, or you can tell me in the Reviews (IF you're a guest and you review I have to approve the review before it goes onto my story, I post most of them, but if you don't want anyone to see your ideas I won't post it) That goes to anyone whether you don't have an account or not, I'd love to get some PM from you guys! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	43. Chapter 43

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 43**

"Are Katniss and I going to be the show stealers again?" I ask Portia as she goes to get my outfit. The rest of the afternoon had been easier chatter, when Portia wants to move, how the bakery was doing, nothing to invoke too much emotion or bring on another round of silence. She had finally finished all the work that my prep team had started.

"Well, I sure hope so." She starts helping me into an all black jump suit; I wonder if they'd really set us on fire again, but I doubt they would, Cinna and Portia would never do something twice. This was something different.

She turns down the lights making the room in between dark and light. She pushes down on a button and in a couple seconds, I'm no longer a person, but a coal. Deep in a fire that's been burning for hours, the last bits of the horror that made the wood into this. I glow and soften and my light moves just as a coal would. Many hours of research it must have been to create this. I doubt any one will be as stunning as Katniss and I will be. I doubt any one will look as beautiful as I am sure Katniss will look in this.

"Portia this is stunning." She pushes the button my wrist again and the glowing stops. I'm back to a person, just the regular Peeta Mellark, nothing special and burning like I was only seconds ago.

"Well, Cinna was a big part of it, but thank you. We want every one's eyes to be on you two, no one else, just you. No one can take their eyes away from fire, right?" I think of last year how instantly everyone's eyes went to us, how mesmerizing the both of us were. Now we are coals, burning and strong and hot, surely we will be everyone's attention once again. Portia's right no one can take their eyes away from fire.

"One more thing Peeta, no more bubbly like last year. You are Victors; you are better than them all. No waving. No nothing. Got it?" I nod my head and we leave the room together.

When I get down to the bottom of the training center, I see Katniss talking to no other than Finnick Odair. He barely wears any clothes and he holds himself like he's a gift from God, and instantly I feel that hate, that hate of the arrogant person he is. But then I think of Annie, the way she looked at him when he was reaped, the same look I'm sure I gave Katniss when she volunteered. For some one to love some one else that much there had to be a good person way deep inside. I can't forget that, no matter how much he annoys me because somewhere deep in the heart of District Four is Annie Cresta waiting for her lover to return home.

Finnick leaves Katniss seconds before I make it to her. "_What did Finnick Odair want?" _I remember when he won, so young, so ruthless, so beautiful. Now I'm here to make sure he dies so Katniss can live. I know he has someone waiting for him at home, but so does Katniss.

Katniss turns to me and puckers her lips, even bats her eyelashes, giving me her best impression of him, "_He offered me sugar and wanted to know all my secrets." _

I laugh at her silly impression of him, she even added in a seductive voice, "_Ugh. Not really." _

_ "Really. I'll tell you more when my skin stops crawling." _That's how most people see Finnick in the Districts, a slime ball, always searching for the next girl to break her heart. I want to argue with her, tell her he's not what the Capitol puts him out to be, but it would take a long explanation, and it's best Katniss not feel sympathy for any of the other tributes.

I go along with her, thinking of the way the Capitol could have crept up on us, swallowed us whole, if we didn't have to be tributes again that is, "_Do you think we'd have ended up like this if only one of us had won? Just another part of the freak show?"_

"_Sure," _I could never see Katniss becoming part of the Capitol, it just wasn't her, and it wasn't what she stood for. Me I didn't totally like the Capitol either, but did I only think that way because I had Katniss right beside me? "_Especially you." _She says.

"_Oh. And why especially me?" _I say. Truly wondering what her answer would be.

"_Because you have a weakness for beautiful things and I don't." _I think of all the times I've painted the trees in District Twelve because of their beauty, or the multitude of times Katniss has passed something full of beauty with out even a glance. "_They would lure you into their Capitol ways and you'd be lost entirely." _

"_Having and eye for beauty isn't the same thing as a weakness. Except possibly when it comes to you." _How badly right now do I just want to wrap her in my arms, to feel her heart beating along with mine. Then I remember where we are, what we must do, "_Shall we?" _I hold up my hand and help her into the chariot

"_Hold still," _She straightens the black charcoal crown on top of my head. She looks so beautiful, so dangerous, so perfect, I want to grab her hand and kiss it. I don't, now isn't the time. At least we're with each other, "_Have you seen our suit turned on? We're going to be fabulous again."_

_ "Absolutely. But Portia says we're to be very above it all. No waving or anything." _I look around to find our stylists, but I don't see them around, "_Where are they any way?"_

"_I don't know. Maybe we better go ahead and turn ourselves on." _Katniss and I become coals, Victors who have suffered it all, Victors who last much longer than the flames do, Victors who will be going through this all again.

"_Are we supposed to hold hands again this year?"_ I look at Katniss, her make-up is dark, she looks dangerous, a threat to whoever gets in her way, but I still see that girl that I saw the first day of kindergarten. Beautiful and full of life.

"_I guess that's left up to us." _Katniss looks into my eyes and as our chariot moves closer and closer to the city circle I get lost in them for just a moment. She grabs my hand, we look straight forward, above the crowd and the cheers and the flowers being thrown at us.

We are Victors; we are above them all.

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**I hope you liked it! Happy Halloween Everyone! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	44. Chapter 44

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 44**

We are the only thing any one is staring at, even the other tributes as we travel through the city circle look back every once and a while and stare, their mouths open wide. I do not feel nervous like last year, but strong, fierce, ready for anything that comes my way. Katniss's hand still grips mine. Oh, how much things have changed since when I first held her hand one year ago. We now could not imagine life with out the other. We now were totally different people. The only thing that is the same from our last chariot ride is our names. That is the only way anyone could tell we were the same people.

We are the only thing any one is staring at. People don't cheer as loudly as they did last year. The whole feel is totally different. These are no longer children, but adults, clad in horrendous costumes. These are people, with lives, with families, with people that need them to survive. People still cheer, people still shout their praises, but it isn't the same. No, it isn't the same at all.

Katniss and I don't lose our faces of power until the chariot has left the city circle and we see our team. Then and only then do we relax our shoulders, let our faces show how excited we were by our performance. Our team congratulates us like last year. I'm sure the Capitol people have never seen such a sight, for once every one is off of their chariots, the tributes begin to socialize. The tributes from District Eleven come up to us, Chaff and Seeder.

Katniss hugs Seeder while I give a strong handshake to Chaff with his only hand. Once Seeder lets go of Katniss, Chaff moves over to her, grabbing her and kissing her right on the lips. I would be mad, but I know he only does it to off-set Katniss and he's is probably twice her age. Katniss looks shocked and disoriented and Chaff looks like he couldn't be happier from her reaction.

The Capitol attendants rush us onto the elevators. Tributes aren't supposed to talk to each other let alone hug each other, talk of personal things in their lives. This wasn't normal.

Katniss and I walk hand in hand to the elevator. As we wait Johanna Mason the all to innocent-girl-turned-savage-girl in her games. She was a good actor, no one expected her to win. Not at all. She wears a costume that looks like a tree and she takes off a giant head-piece that sets on her head. She speaks to Katniss for a little bit as we wait for the elevator about her envy of Cinna's beautiful designs.

Johanna, although not surprising from what I've seen of her over the years, takes off her costume to reveal her naked body just before we step on the elevator. I didn't look, I didn't want to, besides I know she was nothing compared to what I imagined Katniss would be, but Katniss looks over the moon annoyed. I know Johanna does this just to make her uncomfortable. A weakness everyone learned about while in our games.

"Peeta, I saw some of your paintings. They blew me away. You really have an eye for things." Coming from another victor, this meant everything. They saw it, the nightmares these paintings held, they saw what I've been through to paint it.

"Thank you. Painting really helped me." I look over at Katniss she tries not to look over at us, but her face looks so full of anger I know she'll yell at me when we get to our floor.

"I'm sure it did." The elevator stops at floor seven, Johanna's floor, "Oh looky here, my floor. See you guys!" She waves at us and leaves. The look on Katniss's face is comical. It leaves me smiling, which is horrible because Katniss probably thinks I'm smiling for different reasons. I don't see why she doesn't get that she's the only girl I see. That any other girl, even naked, could ever take my mind away from her beauty.

Chaff and Seeder are dropped off. I instantly start laughing as Katniss's face stays in a grimace. It's funny how annoyed she is by this. The elevator opens to our floor. "_What?"_ She turns away not even giving me the chance to look at her eyes.

"_It's you Katniss. Can't you see?" _The frown still sits there on her face, not looking like it will move any time soon.

"_What's me?"_ she asks, totally oblivious.

"_Why they're all acting like this. Finnick with his sugar cubes and Chaff kissing you and that whole thing with Johanna stripping down. They're play with you because you're so…" _I try to think of the right word, but nothing comes, "_You know." _

_ "No I don't know." _I feel I'm treading on dangerous waters, but I doubt she'll let me change the subject. The best way I could describe it was Katniss. It was who she was, what she did; she was Katniss.

"_It's like when you wouldn't look at me naked in the arena even though I was half dead. You're so…" _I almost say innocent, but that isn't the right word. Katniss and I weren't innocent not at all, that word could never describe us. "_Pure." _I say finally think of the right word.

"_I am not!"_ she screams at me, "_I've been practically ripping your clothes off every time there's been a camera for the last year!" _

_ "Yeah, but… I mean for the Capitol you're pure. For me, your perfect." _I try to soften the mood, to get that scowl off of her face, "_They're just teasing you." _It doesn't help, only makes the scowl deeper. I can see the lines of stress that mark her mother begin to become part of her.

"_No, they're laughing at me, and so are you!"_

_ "No,"_ Why does the need to laugh always hit me at the wrong times? Because even as I say it I have to force myself to not smile. Right then Effie and Haymitch come into the room. They look fine, actually more happy than usual, but then something disturbs Haymitch.

"_Looks like they've got a matched set this year." _I turn and see two avoxes before us. One the girl that tended to Katniss last year, the other so familiar I know he lived in District Twelve. Then it hits me, this is the man lying on the ground after Gale's whipping. Katniss was friends with him, he went to the hob, he was one of the peacekeepers people liked. I can't bring his name to mind, but I know he's here for a reason; to offset Katniss.

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**Hope you liked it! Okay did you guys know there was actual Hayffie in the books? Like I've read CF 3x and I've never noticed it, but seriously check it out, page 216 of CF. I did not know that was there! Anyways on a different note, I got a couple of new reviewers today! YAY! Welcome guys! AND I forgot to tell you, but the amount of reviews on this story have passed the reviews on The Fate Games! You guys are amazing! Thank you! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	45. Chapter 45

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire. **

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**Ch. 45**

Katniss looks in a horrible state the whole rest of the night. She avoids me at any cost, she didn't talk to me or any one else at dinner, she stays far away from me when we watched the replay of the opening ceremonies, and there was no goodnight. I wasn't sure if she was still upset about earlier or if she just didn't like the fact that, this peacekeeper, Darius I think it was, was here, serving us. It's just a slap in the face from Snow, and if that's why she's acting like this it worked.

I try to go talk to her about once everyone's asleep, but she doesn't come to answer her door when I knock. I think of just opening the door and going in anyways, but I know sometimes Katniss does need space so I decide against it.

The next morning I wake early and decide to just go out to breakfast because really I don't have anything to do in my room. Effie sits by herself at the table, a magazine in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other. She hears me walking and looks up.

"Oh Peeta, you're just the man I need to talk to. Haymitch told me for your token you need something that holds pictures," I hadn't even talked to Haymitch about getting something, but of course he was on the same page as me, "So going on the theme of gold, I got you a locket, it's really something. And there's two spots for pictures inside." She holds it up. I don't really care what it looks like, only that it can carry pictures.

I grab it from her hand, "Thank you Effie. This is much appreciated."

"Oh Peeta, it was really nothing. Now we can all look like a team." She picks up something else that is gold as well, "Look what I got for Haymitch." It's some sort of bracelet; I just know he is going to hate it.

Effie and I sit in silence as I eat and wait for Haymitch to come out. He was going to tell us how to act in front of the other tributes just like he did last year. I wonder what our strategy this year will be. Everyone already knows everyone else's skill-sets, this was the most prepared any one will ever be going into the Games, and every one of the tributes has the same knowledge of the other players.

Finally Haymitch comes to the table. He looks drunk. I'm disappointed that he went back to his old ways. He was actually getting somewhere with out a bottle of white liquor in hand. "Where's Katniss?" He asks clearly upset that not all of us are at the table.

"I think she might still be sleeping. Or maybe she's getting ready. She might be awhile." Haymitch sits down in a chair with a big plunk, I'm surprised the chair doesn't break below him.

"Fine. I guess I'll just have to tell the plan twice. Okay first things first, you two will still be in love."

"Never stopped." I say when he pauses to see my reaction.

"Whatever. And you need to make friends." The last sentence drops like a bomb. I thought Katniss and I would be our own allies, we wouldn't work with any one else. It was too dangerous.

"No, they're too shady. Besides I'd rather just work with Katniss."

"Peeta. I know what I'm talking about. The two of you won't survive by yourselves around a bunch of other Victors. They're strong. It'd be smart to get in with some of them." He has a valid point, and he was right he did know what he was talking about. I decided to listen to his plan, no matter how much I really didn't like it.

The rest of the morning we sit and wait for Katniss, but she doesn't come until we are only minutes away from having to go down to the bottom of the training center. Haymitch is very angry by the time she comes. She doesn't like the idea of making friends either. To her it sounded like becoming a career. But that's what we were really, careers. We had trained, become stronger just for this, so we could win. That was the exact definition of a career. It only made sense to act like one.

Haymitch wanted us to get in with Chaff and Seeder, but he said Finnick would be a good idea as well. He also made a valid point, every one of us were already killers, any one would make a good ally.

We go down to the training center earlier than we should because Effie doesn't want us to be that last ones there. Only two other Tributes are there when we get there. Katniss let me take her hand, which doesn't mean much, this could just be the acting, but it does feel nice to have her hand around mine.

By the time Atala begins her speech only half of the tributes are here. I look at the other tributes, each one respectively also a victor. Each one living because twenty-three other children died. We all have something in common we can't deny that. And even as Cashmere glares at me, I see the years warn down on her, the children that still haunt her. We all have that, that different look in our eyes, except you don't notice it until you're a victor yourself.

Katniss and I split up once Atala finishes her speech. I watch as Katniss walks to the knot-tying station. I go a different route and head for the spears where Chaff and Brutus stand. They shake my hand as I walk over to them. It was time to make some friends.

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**I hope you liked it! Sorry, it's so short, And sorry I didn't post yesterday, but I'll make up for it today. I will probably post another chapter today and if I don't, you can yell at me :) Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	46. Chapter 46

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 46**

I meet a lot of the other tributes. They all take me in rather easily even though I'm the "new guy". All of them already know each other. They whisper of all the horrible things the other Victors had down over the last year. It might be entertaining if I actually knew the people they were talking about.

"Did you hear that Petri is getting married?" whispers Cashmere into Enobaria's ear, but everyone that was within a ten feet distance could have heard it.

"How did he get a girl?" Enobaria says in a loud voice. She obviously did not care if any one else were to hear.

"Don't ask me. But I hear she's poorer than dirt and uglier than him." I stop listening after that comment. Obviously Petri was Victor no one liked, because no one stands up for him and some even nod their heads along with the conversation.

I go from station to station, shaking hands with the other Tributes, talking to them about my last year, how the Victory Tour went, stuff like that. They nod their heads along and act interested, but I know all they are thinking about is how I was going to be dead soon. I know they don't really care to know what I say, but they are all polite and since I've always had my way with words we become quick friends. If friends was even the right word for a person you'd be ready to kill in a couple days, but really deep down inside of me, I know we would be friends if that weren't the fact.

Later in to the day Johanna comes up behind me while I'm throwing knives with some of the other victors. "Hey, what's your girlfriend doing with Nuts and Volts?" I turn around to find Katniss sitting at the fire-making station with the two tributes from District Three, Wiress and Beetee. Beetee was a very smart intelligent player. He had won his games with a wire. Although I wasn't quite sure how it worked, but it wasn't surprising; Three was the technology District.

"Nuts and Volts?" I say back not knowing what the nicknames were for.

"Yeah. They're crazy. No one can have a normal conversation with them for more than five minutes. I tried once. It was the worst minute of my life." Johanna picks up a knife and throws it at one of the targets. It wasn't right on the target, but it could have been fatal.

"Maybe they'd be good Allies." I say knowing Katniss wouldn't want to hang out with the stronger tributes. She had to see some potential in the weaker players. Maybe it's the fact that they'd be easier to kill of once we had to turn against each other.

Johanna just snorts and continues throwing knives. I hear a couple of the others use the nickname as well. I get the feeling not many people like them.

By lunchtime I'm with a group of about ten other victors. All the tables where we eat lunch are spread out, because honestly the tributes don't usually like to eat together. I'm not sure who came up with the idea, maybe Brutus, but pretty soon I'm helping push all the tables together into one.

I see Katniss come in, but she doesn't make eye contact with me. I know she sees me. Maybe me hanging with all of the stronger Victors makes her mad. If it's what I had to do to get her to win, I had to do it.

I catch up to her as she serves herself some food, "_How's it going?" _I say to her.

"_Good. Fine. I like the District Three victors. Wiress and Beetee." _I was hoping she would decide against wanting them as allies because from what I heard of them they weren't fun to talk to, but that's the funny thing about Katniss she always goes for things you wouldn't expect her to. Like when she came and rescued me.

"_Really? They're something of joke to the others." _I'm not sure why I said that, I know it won't help on my case if I'm trying to persuade Katniss, but it kind of just slipped out of my mouth.

"_Why does that not surprise me?" _Katniss's voice is laced with sarcasm, but still I go on.

"_Johanna's nicknamed them Nuts and Volts. I think she's Nut and he's Volts." _

_ "And so I'm so stupid for thinking they might be useful. Because of something Johanna Mason said while she was oiling up her breasts for wrestling." _There I go getting Katniss mad at me again.

"_Actually I think the nickname's been around for years. And I didn't mean that as an insult. Just sharing information." _I begin to back off hoping Katniss will let it go. I hope no one sees this and begins to spread rumors about a lovers tiff.

"_Well, Wiress and Beetee are smart. They invent things. They could tell by sight that a force field had been put up between us and the Gamemakers. And if we have to have allies, I want them."_

Katniss drops the ladle she's using to get stew back into the pot splattering drops of gravy on both of us. Whatever was making her mad, it had to be more than this. "_What are you so mad about? Because I teased you on the elevator? I'm sorry. I thought you would just laugh about it."_

There's a flash in her eyes for a second, just a second, but I see it. There's so much in the look that it's hard to explain. There was sorrow and sadness and the little child in all of us begging to be held. I want to drop everything and do that; just hold her. Just from that one look she gave me, I want to hold her for the rest of the day. But we can't because we are surrounded by the other tributes and I know what else was hidden in that look.

"_Forget it,"_ she shakes her head and takes her eyes away from me, "_It's a lot of things."_

_ "Darius." _I say in a small voice.

"_Darius. The Games. Haymitch making us team up with the others." _There was a small part of Katniss that I had forgotten about; she didn't like to make friends. I almost feel bad for talking like that about Beetee and Wiress, they were easier to talk to than the others. Deep down inside Katniss was still the girl I saw at school sitting by herself at lunch.

"_It can just be you and me, you know." _I'd like it better that way and if it's easier on Katniss then I'd like it even more.

"_I know. But maybe Haymitch is right. Don't tell him I said so, but he usually is, where the Games are concerned." _That was a good point. Haymitch always knew what was best for Katniss and I.

"_Well you can have a final say about our allies. But right now, I'm leaning toward Chaff and Seeder." _I had got to chat with them for a little bit and they weren't gossiping a lot like the others. They also were strong, even though they were pretty old.

"_I'm okay with Seeder, not Chaff. Not yet, anyways." _

_ "Come on and eat with him. I promise, I won't let him kiss you again." _

The rest of lunch Katniss does actually try and talk to other Victors and as the afternoon goes on she begins to branch out.

But then something magical happens, Katniss goes to the archery station. No one else stood there, I guess she went there to get out of having to talk to anyone else. She begins shooting, it's in the target every single time. I've never seen her do this before. It's pure talent, pure beauty. I feel like I didn't fully know Katniss until now. The trainer begins throwing things into the air and Katniss hits every last one of them.

Every other Tribute has stopped what they are doing, their mouths hang wide open. These aren't the skills of someone having practice, these are the skills of someone being born with it. Now I can't imagine Katniss doing anything else, but shooting, it's her, it's who she is. She transforms from a Victor, with pain and loss and tragedy under her skin, to a girl of full of power.

Katniss truly stands up to her name right now; Katniss Everdeen The Girl who was on Fire.

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**I hope you liked it! It's longer one:) LEF, I know you were really excited for this part, sorry if I didn't write what you were hoping for, if you didn't like it, PM me with what you were hoping for? Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	47. Chapter 47

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 47**

Training goes by fast, pretty soon it's time for our private sessions. I'm not sure what I'll do; obviously throwing weights around won't cut it this year. When it's just Katniss and I alone in the room waiting for our names to be called I speak up, "_Decided what to do for the Gamemakers yet?"_

_ "I can't really use them for target practice this year, with the force field and all. Maybe make some fishhooks. What about you?" _She says with the shake of the head.

"_Not a clue. I keep wishing I could bake a cake or something," _It's the only thing I was good at that could come to mind, but baking doesn't help in this situation.

"_Do some more camouflage," _I actually had considered that, but during the week the same two people occupied the camouflage station, the two from Six, or as everyone knew them, the morphlings. I have to say they were pretty good and even some of the stuff they did would take some extra concentration on my part.

"_If the morphlings have left me anything to work with. They've been glued to that station since training started." _I say letting it known that would have been a good plan.

Katniss doesn't say anything and I don't either. We both know what will come in the next week, we will have to kill some of these people, watch them die. They were nice people; one had to try really hard to not like them. Every one of us deserved the title victor and none of us deserved to be called a tribute again.

"_How are we going to kill these people Peeta?" _Katniss whispers. The same question has crossed my mind multitudes of times in the last days. Then I think of why I have to, for Katniss. I have to make sure she makes it out alive. She needs to be able to have a life.

"_I don't know," _I whisper, setting my head down on our hands held together. This was true, I did have to get Katniss home, but then there's Cecelia with her children and Finnick with Annie, everyone had a reason to get home, the question was who had the best.

"_I don't want them as allies. Why did Haymitch want us to get to know them? It'll make it much harder than last time. Except for Rue maybe. But I guess I never really could've killed her, anyway. She was just too much like Prim." _Katniss says, her voice getting heavier and heavier with each word.

Rue. The twelve year-old that held her family together. Rue. One of the only people Katniss gave her love to. Rue. The girl that died for no reason. The Capitol had to see that right? That Rue was so innocent, so lovable. There was no true reason for her death except for pure evil. If they didn't see that, they needed to. They needed to see all the horrible things they have done to their own people.

"_Her death was the most despicable, wasn't it?" _I say to Katniss, hoping she will look at me and confirm the thoughts in my head.

"_None of them were very pretty," _Her words bring Cato's sad horrible sounds back to mind. She's right; the Capitol did horrible things to everyone of the tributes. Then I remember, Katniss had told me she had covered Rue in flowers. She had explained it one night, my words had been in her mind when she had done it. Really it was just a slap in the face to the Capitol.

As I hear my name called I know just what I will do.

I come into the room, the Gamemakers aren't quite as loud this year and not many talk amongst each other. Seneca Crane no longer is the Head Gamemaker, he is dead, gone like all those forgotten tributes, for keeping Katniss and I alive. Instead stands the new Head Gamemaker, Plutarch Heavensbee. He stares straight at me, his eyes trained on me, he is waiting for whatever I will do.

I don't say anything; instead I walk straight to where they have all the camouflage materials set up. It's a mess in this area; clearly the morphlings have done just what I thought they would.

I pick out bright dyes; clearly they come from flowers, just what I need. I only pick out one darker color for Rue's creamy skin, but the rest are bright. So bright it was ironic for what I want the Gamemakers to get from this.

I haven't painted since I was back home, I get the same anxious feeling I get each time before I begin as I set the dyes down on the ground and go down with them myself.

I begin by dipping my fingers in the green; the grass lying beneath her is what I start with. I move on through the flowers and Rue with her eyes closed and all the small details that can't be forgotten. I turn around every so often to look at the eyes of the Gamemakers, my body blocks what I paint, but still their eyes are trained on my back.

I look at it one last time before I stand up and say a silent thanks to Rue, wherever she might be. My picture lays out the scene that Katniss had explained to me. Rue looks as if she's sleeping, her head lying softly on the green lush grass. Flowers cover her like a blanket, making her look like an angel, something of peace.

I move away from the painting and let the Gamemakers see it; their eyes show amazement for a second before they realize what it means. A man way in the back realizes before anyone else, for he gasps, and then it starts a chain reaction, eyes wide open in shock, hands lain across hearts, they did not expect this. I guess they believe that once a tribute is dead they will never be brought up again. Way down in their hearts there has to be a little bit of human left. I bet some nights it comes up and they feel horrible and for just one second they feel grief for the many children that have died.

I see it in their faces, what I have done to them. I have reminded them what they have done to the Districts, and the families, and most of all, the children. I see that little piece of human in them for just one second, and then it's gone. That's when I hear Plutarch Heavensbee say, "You may leave now Mr. Mellark."

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**I hope you liked it! Oh gosh, I really liked this one, slap in the face to the Capitol! Go Peeta! Anyways, you guys haven't been review-y lately...Just keep me updated on how your feeling about my writing, if you have the time! Thank you! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	48. Chapter 48

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 48**

As I come back into the room I don't acknowledge Effie or Haymitch. In all honesty I don't think they noticed me until I had closed my door because I don't hear my name called out until I'm well into my room. I already have my clothes partially off when Haymitch begins to knock on my door.

"How was it?" He says, there is no urgency in his voice like there was last year with Katniss. I'm not sure how the Gamemakers will take it, but I know my score won't be that good.

"Okay, just going to take a shower. I have dye on my hands." I know at dinner I'll have to tell them what I had done. I wonder how they'll take it? Pure terror? Or maybe they'll be proud, well at least Haymitch might be.

"Camouflage?" He asks. I decide a lie now would be fine, besides it's not really lying.

"Yeah," I say and I hear him walk away from the door. I step into the shower, that Portia had pre-set for me, so I don't smell like roses again. The shower is nice on my muscles and takes the intenseness of the colors away from my hands, although the faint outline of the colors is still there.

By the time I step out of the shower it's almost time for dinner. I get dressed quickly and walk to the table with my hair still wet. I've barely even sat down when Haymitch says, "_All right, so how did your private sessions go?" _

Katniss looks at me, her eyes worried, she must of done something to upset the Gamemakers again. I doubt they expect me to do the same thing, but I'm willing to go first. Everyone at the table stares at both of us as Katniss says, "_You first. It must have been really special. I had to wait for forty minutes to get in." _ I didn't think of how I had stained the ground; how it would take a long time to get it off. From the looks of my hands I doubt they did, they probably had to cover it with something.

I really don't want to speak, I feel scared of everyone's reactions. It's not something I would normally do, but if it made the Gamemakers feel bad, that's what I wanted. I look at everyone staring at me expectantly, I guess now was a good time as ever to tell them, but something was holding me back.

"_Well, I—I did the camouflage thing, like you suggested, Katniss." _I pause wondering where to go with my words, "_Not exactly camouflage. I mean, I used the dyes."_

_ "To do what?" _asks Portia. Every one is waiting for what I will say next, all their heads are inclined towards me, waiting, waiting.

We sit in silence for what was probably only seconds before Katniss speaks up, "_You painted something, didn't you? A picture." _ Surely Katniss would have said something if she had seen it, but how did she know?

"_Did you see it?" _I ask.

"_No. But they'd made a real point of covering it up." _I can just imagine how flustered they were as they searched for something, anything to put over it.

_"Well that would be standard. They can't let one tribute know what the other did. What did you paint, Peeta? Was it a picture of Katniss?"_ Oh how innocent, Effie sounds.

"_Why would he paint a picture of me, Effie?" _says Katniss, clearly annoyed as she waits for me to tell them.

"_To show he's going to do everything he can to defend you. That's what the Capitol's expecting, anyway. Didn't he volunteer to go in with you?" _Effie says clearly thinking that was exactly what I had done. It's what one would suspect, isn't it? I was always the romantic, Katniss the ruthless one, the one that took chances. I did not take chances, I spent my whole life working up the courage to tell the girl of my dreams I loved her, and I didn't until I had to in front of the whole country. Showing up the Gamemakers wasn't who I used to be, but it is who I am now.

I decide to finally let it out to insure this bickering doesn't go on, "_Actually I painted a picture of Rue. How she looked after Katniss had covered her in flowers." _

I'm not sure everyone gets it as we sit in silence. I'm not sure they see what I saw; the shocked look on the Gamemakers faces, their mouths wide open. It was a slap in the face to them.

Finally after minutes of silence Haymitch speaks, no anger leaks into his level voice, "_And what exactly were you trying to accomplish?" _I think it over, what was I trying to accomplish? Obviously I wasn't trying to get a good score, but what exactly was I trying to get across to the Gamemakers?

"_I'm not sure. I just wanted to hold them accountable, if only for a moment, for killing that little girl." _I say and if that's what I was trying to accomplish, I did. I remember that look they all held for one second, the stunned shock that crossed their face and then the humanity that came next, the guilt that they must feel at some moments.

"_That is dreadful." _Effie utters, her words full of shock, I'm surprised that Katniss and I still shock her, but of course we still do, "_That sort of thinking… it's forbidden, Peeta." _Now I was being monitored for my own thoughts? "_Absolutely. You'll only bring down more trouble on yourself and Katniss." _Did I think about that as I did it? Of course not, I didn't think of my goal or how it would affect it, only that I wanted to get my point across. I just hope it won't cause too much trouble.

"_I have to agree with Effie on this one." _Says Haymitch.

"_I guess this is a bad time to mention I hung a dummy and Painted Seneca Crane's name on it."_ Lets out Katniss. The whole table let's out a gasp. Both of us made stupid mistakes and the whole table is surprised to know that we didn't plan it. I guess great minds think alike. The Gamemakers must feel horrible about themselves tonight, but I'm sure a smile will play on their lips when mine and Katniss's scores are lower than any one's score as ever been.

Haymitch looks disappointed in us, Cinna and Portia look disoriented, and Effie left the table looking like she was going to throw up, we really know how to upset our team.

"_And, Haymitch?" _I say, "_We decided we don't want any other allies in the arena." _No one would want to be our allies after tonight anyways.

"_Good. Then I won't be responsible for you killing off any of my friends with your stupidity." _He's angry, I can tell, I'm not sure he'll even tell me his plan to keep Katniss alive. He looks as if he's given up on us. That's not what we're supposed to do; we are supposed to keep on fighting no matter what any of us do, but Haymitch looks done. Done with our childish antics, done with our stupidity.

"_That's just what we were thinking." _Says Katniss. Everyone else stays silent.

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**I hope you liked it! Sorry I didn't post last night, I was watching the election. YAY! OBAMA! Sorry I don't mean to offend anyone, if that's not who you wanted to win, but obviously we can't change it now and I'm happy with the results. Don't get mad at me please! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	49. Chapter 49

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 49**

We all sit in silence as we listen to the training scores. A fear has settled across all of our team, a fear that no matter how hard Katniss and I fight we will be killed anyways, a fear that this time Katniss and I went too far. We'd been pushing the buttons of the Capitol since we first got here, testing to see how far we could go, now we have finally found it.

No one shouts or praises us as it's read off that we both got twelve's, the highest score any one has ever had in the history of the Games, because when it all came down to it, it was only because they were trying to set us out as a target, or how Haymitch put it, "_So that the others will have no choice but to target you._"

We were no longer the tributes others wanted to ally with; we were the tributes others hated, the tributes that died first. It didn't feel good to be honest. It felt horrible actually. I just wish I could go back in time and do something normal, maybe paint a picture of Katniss like Effie had suggested, maybe then I wouldn't feel this bad. Maybe then Haymitch wouldn't look at us like we were the worst scum on the Earth.

Katniss and I walk hand in hand to our room, our mouths stay silent, and our hands feel glued together. I don't think I could handle this alone. We stop at her door and it's only a moment before she's wrapped her arms around me, only a second until our hearts are beating as one. "_I'm sorry if I made things worse." _She whispers, the regrets of today wear heavily in her voice.

"_No worse than I did." _I pause, "_Why did you do it any way?"_ Her warmth comforts me slightly, but there's still the ever-present fear that in the end we'll both die.

"_I don't know. To show them that I'm more than just a piece in their Games?" _she says and I let out a small laugh. The conversation when I had first said that seems so long ago, but the words I muttered then had been in both of our minds for a long time. It's why we've been pushing at the Capitol all this time, we weren't trying to upset them; we were only showing them we were humans just like them. If we could even be in the same category as them.

"_Me, too." _I pause, thinking over my next words, "_And I'm not saying I'm not going to try. To get you home, I mean. But if I'm perfectly honest about it…" _I can't say it. I made a promise to myself a long time ago that I would keep Katniss alive. I can't admit to myself that I might actually fail, not fully at least.

"_If you're perfectly honest about it, you think President Snow has probably given them direct orders to make sure we die in the arena anyway." _Katniss utters the words I was too scared to even whisper.

"_It's crossed my mind." _

What of my letters? The ones I had written if Katniss had made it out alive. I need to write different ones, ones to tell them to keep fighting, to fight with us in mind, to start a rebellion and to not stop until it's finished. They'll know that though, won't they? How hard we fought to live, how hard the Capitol pushed back, willing us to die, laughing when we were in pain. If our loved ones don't start a rebellion when the Capitol has finally beaten us then I don't know who will.

"_But even if that happens, everyone will know we've gone out fighting, right?"_ I say, hoping silently that Katniss will agree.

"_Everyone will." _She answers firmly. "_So what should we do with our last few days?" _

_ "I just want to spend every possible minute of the rest of my life with you." _I say, and it's true, but I know tonight I must talk to Haymitch as well. So when we're both in her bed and she's in my arms and her breathing becomes heavy, I leave her for just one minute to talk to Haymitch, if he'll even talk to me.

I'm not surprised to find him sitting in front of the mini-bar all by himself. I know he doesn't see me when I first speak up, and I'm actually a little bit scared that he'll reject me, but I'm hoping that maybe he'll take the time to listen.

"Listen, I know we disappointed you today. I know it seems like we've messed up everything and I just want to say I'm sorry." I let out the words quickly; afraid he'll get up and walk away before I have time to finish. He doesn't, he also doesn't turn around and look at me.

"Go away. I'm not in the mood for your apologies. And yes you did ruin everything. Sorry to tell you, I don't think we're getting her out alive this time." His words are cynical and cold and full of drunkenness.

"I am sorry. It's just…they have to see, those kids that die, they're… kids. They kill children by making other children kill them. It's sick and horrible and I just wanted them to see what they do." I'm not sure what I'm trying to get across he already knows that. I guess I'm just trying to get him to see my point of view.

"Do you think I don't know that Peeta?" He yells at me, I'm surprised Effie doesn't come out to see what's going on. I don't respond to his question and we sit in silence for minutes, waiting for the other to say something. I'm pretty sure he has three drinks before he says anything else. "I get why you did it." His voice is now level; no anger fills it any longer. "I just don't know why you decided it was a good idea."

"I wasn't thinking Haymitch. Haven't you ever had moments like that, where you're just so mad, you just…" My sentence goes off.

"Shouldn't you be with Katniss or something?" He takes another drink. He still has not turned around to look at me.

"Yeah, I just… I wanted to make sure we were still going to keep her alive." Is that what I wanted to talk to him about? Our plan? I'm not sure. I just knew I had to say something to him.

"Of course. But there's only so much I can do." I stand and wait for him to say something else, but he doesn't. I turn around and go back to Katniss's room. I feel a little bit better that he isn't completely disgusted with me anymore. I just have the feeling that maybe he's lost hope in us and that can't be good.

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**I hope you liked it! Sorry I didn't post yesterday! I wasn't very good this week, but I got so many wonderful reviews, thank you so much and keep doing that because it let's me know how you guys feel about my writing! I've had a few people ask about Mockingjay, and I talked about it on an earlier chapter, but I'll say it again: I've been thinking about it and I have some wonderful ideas, but I don't know if I will do it because it seems like a challenge to do Peeta being crazy... but I have some pretty amazing ideas so I'm leaning towards doing it. Also if I do it, it will be called Jabberjay, because Peeta becomes basically a mutt, and it's like Mockingjay. (if you haven't noticed I like to keep the titles like the original titles :The Fate Games:The Hunger Games Rekindled Fire:Catching Fire Jabberjay:Mockingjay) So yeah that's what I'm thinking. Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	50. Chapter 50

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 50**

When Katniss and I hear we won't have to work with Haymitch and Effie today we silently jump with joy. I'd much rather spend my last full day not focusing on what is to come. I want to forget about the stupid mistakes I made and how hard I was going to have to work and how unfair this world really is and just spend time with Katniss while I can.

We gather a bunch of food, get a few blankets and go to the roof where no one will bother us. I know this picnic we are having will last the whole day and it's nice; a glimpse into the future I'll never have. I wonder if she'll spend days like this with Gale? Filled with laughter and chatter and happiness even though every thing behind us is sorrow.

"You know how many times I almost walked up to you and just told you?" I say after playing a game with the force field around the roof. We were talking about last year's interviews and how different they would probably be this year. This of course moved to the giant bomb I had dropped then.

"No, but why didn't you?" She asks after letting out a giggle.

"I don't know. You're so intimidating. Everyone knew you went out into the woods. That takes initiative. I guess I was just afraid you'd turn your nose up to me." I say and sit down next her and she lays her head in my lap and smiles.

"I don't know, I might have said something to you." She pauses and smiles up at me, "Things might be different." She says. I have thought that multiple times, especially back before we had even entered the arena.

"Would they though? If you had known, would Prim's name not be called, and then mine not called either. I just don't see how something so small could have changed the reaping." That's the conclusion I came to, maybe to save me from a guilty conscience, but it sounded good.

"It's not small Peeta, your love for me is the biggest thing I know." Katniss stumbles across those words and her eyes don't meet mine as they're muttered, but I know she means them.

"Yeah, but, it wouldn't change which slip Effie reached for." I say.

"You never know, crazier things have happened." Katniss whispers. Crazier things have happened, but that's the past I can't go back and proclaim my love for Katniss years earlier. It's already happened. But if I could go back and time and fix all of this, I would.

We sit in silence for a while and I push Katniss's hair off her forehead. I lean down and kiss is gently, soaking her all in. I will never forget her, even in my death.

Moments like these remind me of our cave in the arena, our home for those couple days. Our home that brought us together, mended us so it would be nearly impossible to breath with out the other. "Do you ever think of the cave?" I say, she looks up from a daydream and her bright grey eyes bore into mine.

"I don't like to. It brings back bad memories." I know she doesn't mean the moments passed in between us, but the other things, Rue dying, the horrid tracker jackers, the cave was the only good thing there.

"Yeah, but do ever just forget about everything else and remember the cave?" I say. I guess maybe it had a different meaning for me, even if it's slightly tainted after the train ride home.

"Peeta, you almost died in there. Why would I want to remember that?" It was different. When I thought of the cave I thought of our first kiss and the moments in each other's arms and the story of Prim's goat and the caresses and all the beautiful things. Katniss didn't, she saw the pain, my near death, the cut across her forehead, the damp nights. Two totally different things happening all at one time.

"I don't know." I whisper and that's the last time I mention our past games. After that we forget for just a second about what has happened to us and what is going to happen and we just live in the moment. I guess if I had actually thought about it, it would be painful because this is what we could have been.

If I wasn't going to die, this is how our life would be. We would be happy, we would laugh, we would play games, have picnics, it wouldn't be a bad life. I could picture it, us with kids and then later us with grey hair, hand in hand. I forgot that I couldn't have that. I let my mind wander and I actually let myself believe it.

She sits putting together a crown of flowers in her lap and I play with her hair, braiding it and claiming I'm practicing my knot tying. It's nice. I forget that we're at the Capitol and that tomorrow we have to have an interview in front of the country. I forget that we're victors. I forget I'll never see my family again. I forget all the troubles in my life and I let this happen.

But then it comes up on me, the feeling that this might be my very last time I'll have complete privacy with Katniss. I feel the seconds go by too fast and the time passing with out a care; I wish I could just stop it. So I try it, I pause and hope the whole world will do the same, but it doesn't. The universe doesn't let me have my way; not that it ever has.

"_What?" _Katniss asks, wondering why I've set down her hair.

"_I wish I could freeze this moment, right here, right now, and live in it forever." _I say. I imagine Katniss will react to it the same way she always does whenever I say cheesy and romantic like that, but she doesn't.

"_Okay." _She says, and I can hear the yearning in her voice for it as well, though she hides it as best as she can.

_"Then you'll allow it?" _I say with a smile.

"_I'll allow it." _She whispers. But the universe doesn't listen to her either because time goes on.

When it's time for dinner we don't go, we stay right where we are and watch the sunset and let the warmth of each other melt into our bodies. We don't leave the roof until it's really dark and we're tired, even then I'm not ready to let go of these moments.

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**I hope you liked it! I was really excited to write this one, so I hope you were excited to read it! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	51. Chapter 51

**Here's the next chapter! Longest one yet! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 51**

"Peeta, he's making us do this. I'm sorry. It was an order directly from the President." Portia's in the back of the room, rifling through outfits trying to find mine for the interview.

It had been a long day that had started with one of the people from Katniss's prep team crying when they found us in bed together. Then there was no Portia to save me from my sobbing Prep team, crying over how much I'll be missed and that they'll remember me forever. I was overjoyed when they had finished and had gone to find Portia. Her only excuse was that they pleaded to stay with me the whole time so she let them.

Now she's walking towards me a tuxedo in hand and a grimace across her face, "The President said since you never got to have the wedding, you should at least be able to wear the outfits. I don't want to do this." She holds it up so I can see it better. It's not what I would have wanted to wear at my wedding. It's too fancy, too elegant for something so real and sincere.

If Katniss and I really were to get married, I'm sure we would do it in District Twelve before we had it here. I would wear something simple, but nice, and Katniss might wear a simple dress that I'm sure Cinna would make for her. She would be absolutely breathtaking. Only our closest friends and family would come, only the people that saw the sincerity in our love and believed in it. It would be beautiful.

Once the ceremony was over and we were in our home alone, we would toast the bread, only then would our marriage be fully complete and real. Only then would I finally be secure in the fact that Katniss was mine, all mine.

Thinking this I realize I don't want Snow to have the satisfaction of rubbing this marriage that I'll never have in our faces. Katniss and I did get married, or so I'd tell the country. And I would tell them we had consummated our marriage. If I really wanted to make the Capitol feel bad about what they're doing, I'll make them believe that by killing Katniss they weren't just killing her, but our child as well.

This year would be hard for the Capitol people anyways, but when they realize that the Star-crossed Lovers from District Twelve were having a child, I don't know if they'll stand for these Games. Well at least until the blood started running.

When we make our way down to the stage I feel uncomfortable in the formal tux, it does not fit my personality or what I stood for, but it sure will break the hearts of the audience. That's when I see Katniss and she looks absolutely gorgeous, but it's not the dress that makes her appear that way, actually the dress isn't really that great, it's her, all her. Cinna has worked the make-up across her face so perfectly like he does each and every time and it takes everything in me to keep on functioning.

The room falls silent when Katniss and I walk in to the room filled of chattering tributes. I'm sure they feel sorry for us, this was basically President Snow mocking us and I'm sure they could see that from years of being Victors.

"_Cinna actually made you wear that?"_ Asks Finnick to Katniss.

She glares at him and says, "_He didn't have any choice. President Snow made him." _It's the resentment in her voice that makes me feel like we could make the Capitol People feel horrible tonight. I know what I'm going to say during my interview, I wonder what Katniss will do?

I hear Johanna whisper to her as we begin to walk on stage, "_Well make him pay for it, okay?" _All of the Victors stood on the same stand, I'm sure, when it came to the President.

All the tributes, well excluding a few, are marvelous at making the Capitol feel horrible about the Games this year. Each one playing their own card at all the horrible things the Capitol will be doing to their people by playing these Games this year. How their loss of these wonderful Victors must be so hard, and how Finnick Odair will dearly miss his one and only person that holds his heart. Anyone could clearly pick out the cries of multiple woman that thought it was written to them, but if you really knew who Finnick was, he meant all his words to a girl back home watching on an old television set. I wonder if she knows.

Beetee questions the eligibility of this Quell. Johanna calls the people to action, questioning if something could be done about this awful situation. So many words of guilt are spoken that by the time it's Katniss's turn the whole crowd is in tears.

She is sweet just like last year stating her regret for them not being able to see us get married. Then she begins to twirl, only tonight it does not only appear to be on fire, it is on fire. They are not simple flames, but majestic and strong and so real. I know Cinna must be behind this, and Katniss must too because she keeps spinning, on and on as the flames devour her dress. Then the flames are gone and all that's left is her dress and once she's done spinning I see what Cinna has turned her into.

A strong creation that the Capitol did not want, none other than the beautiful Mockingjay that she truly is.

Her interview is over soon after that and it's time for me to go. I'm afraid that if I look into her eyes as we pass I will be frozen by her powerful beauty because of this I don't meet her eyes and I walk to the seat across from Caesar.

Caesar and I begin with our easy banter, but to make sure I have enough time to tell of my "news" I act as if I don't care for it. And so we begin.

"_So, Peeta, what was it like when, after all you've been through, you found out about the Quell?"_ Asks Caesar and I'm thrown back to that night, so emotional, so lost.

"_I was in shock. I mean, one minute I'm seeing Katniss looking so beautiful in all these wedding gowns, and then next…" _I trail off because everyone else knows what happened.

"_You realized there was never going to be a wedding?" _This makes me pause, because that's sort of what I realized then, only not. Because what I realized wasn't that there would be no grand wedding in the Capitol or even one in District Twelve, but that there would be no future, that no matter what I did Katniss and I would never have a life together.

Now's my time, I'm sure the Capitol's waiting for this heart filled monologue about how sad I am to never have a wedding. I bet Snow is waiting for the pain to show across my face, but I can't have that. No, I did not care about not having a wedding, but if that's what the Capitol wanted me to feel bad about it, I guess I'll just have to tell them it already happened.

"_Caesar, do you think all our friends here can keep a secret?"_ I say.

"_I feel quite certain of it." _Caesar answers.

_"We're already married." _I say and it's so simple to let out those words. I even believe them for a second myself. The whole crowd lets out the breath I'm sure they were holding and I feel President Snow somewhere frowning.

"_But…how can that be?" _Asks Caesar, clearly confused, surely if this was true the whole world would have known. But little does he know, I already have all my words planned out.

"_Oh, it's not an official marriage,"_ What made a marriage official exactly? A paper, is that really all? "_We didn't go to the Justice building or anything. But we have this marriage ritual in District Twelve. I don't know what it's like in the other districts. But there's this thing we do." _I begin to explain the toasting of the bread ceremony.

To me it wasn't the paper that made the marriage. It was the people in it, if they truly loved each other and were completely committed to each other, I don't see why one needed a paper to make it official. I don't think anyone else in District Twelve cared of the paper either. They only did it because they had to. If one were to ask anyone in District Twelve what made a marriage real they would reply the toasting of the bread. It's the only thing in this world that made the marriage real and tangible.

"_Were your families there?" _asks Caesar once I've explained the toasting of the bread.

"_No, we didn't tell anyone. Not even Haymitch." _I just knew if I said other people knew they would go ask how the wedding was and I can't put the burden on my loved ones to lie for us. "_And Katniss's mother never would have approved. But you see, we knew if we were married in the Capitol, there wouldn't be the toasting. And neither of us really wanted to wait any longer. So one day, we just did it. And to us, we're more married than any piece of paper of big party could make us." _I can hear the Capitol people crying over my words, I've succeeded. But there was one more thing that would push it over the ledge.

"_So this was before the Quell?"_ he asks.

"_Of course before the Quell. I'm sure we'd never have done it after we knew," _Now I start to get mad at the Capitol just like all the others before me, and everyone is listening with open ears. "_But who could've seen it coming? No one. We went through the Games, we were victors, everyone seemed so thrilled to see us together, and then out of nowhere—I mean, how could we anticipate a thing like that?" _I ask Caesar, my voice intense and full of passion.

"_You couldn't, Peeta."_ Responds Caesar, "_As you say, no one could've. But I have to confess, I'm glad you two had at least a few months of happiness together." _Now it was almost time to drop the biggest bomb of all. I look out into the audience, I'm not sure if they'll be able to handle this. They applaud Caesar and his words, but I have a minute left, I have a few words left to say.

"_I'm not glad. I wish we had waited until the whole thing was done officially."_

Caesar straightens up, clearly confused from my comment, "_Surely even a brief time is better than no time?"_

_ "Maybe I'd think that, too Caesar, if it weren't for the baby." _Just as the last word falls out of my mouth the whole building goes crazy. Killing children was fine, but obviously killing a pregnant girl was not. I didn't know saying that would be so hard for me, but it is. It hit me hard, it made me realize, in a different sense, they would be killing our child. The child we could have had if it weren't for the Games. I hold the tears until the buzzer rings and I walk back to my seat, but when I get there they start rolling down my cheeks.

The anthem begins and we all stand. Then amongst all the chaos and yelling something beautiful happens. For the first time ever, in the whole history of the Games, all the tributes become united by the simple gesture of holding hands. We were going against everything the Capitol hoped for with the Hunger Games, for once we were standing as one.

And it was amazing.

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**Hope you liked it! It's double the length of what I usually write, so a special treat for my wonderful readers because I loaf you guys. :D Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	52. Chapter 52

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 52**

It's hectic as I guide Katniss to the elevator and I wonder just what all of us angry victors had just done. I know hoping that the Games will be ended is pointless. Snow may be a coward in my eyes, but he will not back down when it comes to the Games.

I try to will words to come out of my mouth as we shoot up to our room, but none fall out. All I can think of is that really in my heart of hearts I wish Katniss really was pregnant. I wish that even though I was going to die Katniss could still have a part of me that she can love and hold onto forever.

Then I remember last year, Katniss was angry, really angry because of what I had said, so when we step out of the elevator I grab her shoulder and say, "_There isn't much time, so tell me. Is there anything I have to apologize for?"_

Her eyes search my face and it takes everything in me to not lean in and kiss her right here and now before our time is over for that. But I don't because I know that any second Haymitch will walk through that door and he'll talk to us, then we'll go to bed, and maybe then I'll get my final kiss. "_Nothing." _She says, the word is sure and firm and I know she knows what I have done by making the people believe this.

We wait in silence for the elevator to empty and our team to walk out, but when it does only Haymitch walks in. There is no Effie, there is no Cinna, and there is no Portia. Only him. We wait with open ears for him to tell us what is going on. "_It's madness out there. Everyone's been sent home and they've canceled the recap of the interviews on television." _

Katniss and I hurry over to the window to see the tiny people below us hustling home. Some seem angry as they walk through the streets, others frightened, there is no doubt this night caused a great deal of emotions.

I wonder if they'll take action, if they'll try to end these horrible Games by themselves. "_What are they saying? Are they asking the president to stop the Games?" _My words are too hopeful, even I know as they fall out of my mouth that they are not true.

"_I don't think they know themselves what to ask. The whole situation is unprecedented. Even the idea of opposing the Capitol's agenda is a source of confusion for the people here," _He pauses, looking down the side of the building with us, "_But there's no way Snow would cancel the Games. You know that, right?" _He seems not only to be insuring us, but himself as well. Really we know it would never happen, but there was still that small hope.

Neither Katniss nor I answer his lingering question, instead for a couple seconds we stand in complete silence. "_The other's went home?"_ asks Katniss as the sun begins to go down outside the window.

"_They were ordered to. I don't know how much luck they're having getting through the mob," _says Haymitch. I know I'll see Portia tomorrow; she's the last person I'll see outside of the arena, but Effie; we will never see again. I can't help, but be sad from this realization. I had grown to like her.

"_Then we'll never see Effie again." _I look to Haymitch, "_You'll give her our thanks." _It's more of a statement than a question, but really it's the least he could do.

"_More than that." _Says Katniss, "_Really make it special. It's Effie, after all. Tell her how appreciative we are and how she was the best escort ever and tell her…tell her we send her our love." _Katniss's words couldn't have been truer. There really was a person behind Effie and I had grown to love that person, I'll miss her, and I know she'll miss us.

We stand waiting for the next words to be spoken. No one wants to say them. No one wants to admit that this is right where our team ends; this is where we say goodbye to Haymitch. I thought I was sad last year saying goodbye, but that was an understatement for how I felt now. Haymitch was Haymitch and he had helped us through a lot and we had grown together as a team. It saddened me to know that at the end of the Games only two-thirds of us will be left and I'll be the one-third that is gone, but Haymitch and Katniss could make it out together. They could be there for the other even though I won't be there to help.

Finally as we sit and wait for the inevitable Haymitch speaks up, "_I guess this is where we say our good-byes as well." _

I hold back my tears as I say, "_Any last words of advice?"_

_ "Stay alive."_ All three of us smile as he let's out those two words, but really what else could we do when surely the Capitol was plotting our deaths? He gives us both hugs that aren't long enough and says, "_Go to bed. You need your rest." _

I know I must say something else; those can't be the last words ever spoken between us. I look to Katniss to see if she has anything to say, but I see she holds back tears as well, although she hides it very nicely.

I can't let out some long speech about how I'll miss Haymitch and how great he was and how internally grateful I would be to him, because in the end that's not how our group functioned. Something simple, that's all we needed, "_You take care, Haymitch." _I say.

We begin to leave to our room and it has a sense of finality to it. Haymitch stops us for one more second just to give Katniss some advice. I look back one more time at him as we disappear down the hall. I'll really miss him.

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	53. Chapter 53

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 53**

Portia and Cinna come to get us early in the morning. I say goodbye to Katniss with a simple kiss and a "_See you soon."_ The next time I'll see her will be in the arena, I don't know if there will be time for kisses in there. This one very well could be our last.

Portia wraps her arm around me as we walk to get on the hovercraft. I see small trails of tears across her face, and I will myself not to do the same. "I promised myself I wouldn't. You know, you've always been so strong and here I am crying because I'm going to miss you." She says as she wipes away a tear with her hand.

"No Portia, crying is good, sometimes." I say and grab her into a hug before I grab onto the ladder hanging from the hovercraft and become frozen in place.

"At least we have this little time together." She says in between a sob.

"Of course." I grab onto one of the rungs, the last time I was frozen like this was when I was being taken from the last arena. I barely remember it, I just know I was in pain and I couldn't do anything to stop it. Once inside the hovercraft a lady injects a tracker into my arm. I always wondered if they even ever took the first one out, but from the looks of it they did.

"You should probably eat. We were told there wouldn't be much time for that in the launch room." Portia's eyes are almost dry and she holds a plate of many foods. "Of course you won't take that much time to get ready, so… But I'd still eat now." I begin to take bites of the food she put in front of me, but all of the bites are small and for once the food from the Capitol does not taste good.

"How did you get home last night?" I ask Portia as the windows on the hovercraft close, we are close. I am surprisingly calm for what is to come.

"It was hectic." She pauses looking at me, her eyes seem to be studying my every feature, "That wasn't true, was it? I mean you would have told me, right?" Her words sound almost hurt as she says them. I had even fooled Portia.

"No, it wasn't. Only to get the Capitol People worked up." I pause just like her, except I look elsewhere; maybe I would have looked out the window if it were still open. I feel the hovercraft begin to lower. "I wish it were true." I whisper and it's barely audible, but I know she hears it. Her face contorts for just a second and then it goes back to normal. Maybe she wished it were true as well.

We walk to my launch room silently our footsteps echo between us and the Peacekeepers guiding us there. I recognize what this is; the calm before the storm. I always felt this way whenever I knew my mom would get mad at me or when I knew I would have horrible nightmares. I was just calm, and it's weird because I know within a matter of minutes my life will be threatened, Katniss's life will be threatened. This very well could be the last day I live.

I take a shower and I enjoy it. Soaking in the warm water and let it warm my body. I enjoy the last shower I'll ever have because what else could I do? For a second I take a moment and reflect on this past year. My life has changed dramatically, heck I've changed dramatically. I could say that I hate it, that I still wish I were just Peeta Mellark, baker's son. But for a second I actually think about it. I actually try to think of why in the world I would ever want that because I don't, not at all. I wouldn't give up going into the Games for the world.

Katniss actually noticed me. She fell in love with me, no matter how much she denies it I know she does. Sure I don't like that I had nightmares every night for a long time and that I had fallen apart from my family and that I was held responsible for the death of a girl I didn't know because I picked some berries. I didn't like any of that and more, but still I would not like to be stuck in the bakery.

I had encouraged people to fight. I had encouraged people to stand up to this horrible system. Maybe I won't be here to see it go through, but I know in my heart of hearts these horrible games will be ended. I know in my heart of hearts that Snow will be defeated. I know in my heart of hearts that Katniss will have a good life.

Fine, maybe I would give up having to die in these wretched Games, but everything before it, not a chance I would take that back. I had grown, I had fallen in love again and again, I had felt loss and sorrow, I had been angry and mad, I had experienced life. It's not the ideal life, but I can call it mine. I can take pride in it. That takes something.

After my shower Portia helps me put my clothes on, a blue jump suit that fits tight to my body. A thick belt goes over that and then a pair of nylon shoes. "It's water proof. I'd expect somewhere wet." Says Portia as she zips it up. Once she's done we hear the voice over the speaker telling us to prepare ourselves. She gives us five minutes.

Portia grabs something out of her pocket, "Your district token. It's beautiful." She drops the gold locket in my hand. I put it around my neck and hide it beneath my suit. I grab Portia into a tight hug, wondering why I have to let go.

"Portia thank you, for everything. You've been a great friend." I whisper into her ear as she clings tightly to me. We let go once the voice comes over again. Only a minute left.

"Peeta, no matter what happens know that I'll miss you." I step into the tube, having to let go of her hand. "Know that I will never forget you." The tube begins to close over me, "Know that I'll take care of Katniss for you with Cinna." And then the tube is closed up all together and I'm rising. I take one last look at her, before I look up to where I am going.

The first thing I think when I lock into place: I cannot swim.

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**I hope you liked it! Sorry I didn't post yesterday! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	54. Chapter 54

**Here's the next chapter! Sorry I haven't posted in a couple days! Enjoy! I do not own CF any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch**.** 54**

I can't see Katniss, the cornucopia must block her, but it still worries me. There are tributes set in pairs all around the Cornucopia which sits in the middle of the water with about twelve land spokes coming off of it. But it doesn't look good to me, I had no need to swim in District Twelve and I bet a lot of the tributes standing here have the same dilemma. I remember Katniss telling me once that her dad taught her ages ago, if we would have known she would have taught me.

When the gong rings out I stand still, I don't do anything. I don't want to die drowning in the first seconds of the Games, I'm sure Katniss will come up with something. That's when I see her, going straight for the bow and arrow that I'm sure was set down just for her. This year the supplies aren't spread out, they all sit in the middle, waiting to be picked up and used.

I try to find anything but weapons, but that's all that sit there. Weapons after weapons each one sitting there I'm sure because of one of the tribute's skill set. I wonder if there's a paintbrush sitting in the mouth just for me.

I see Finnick coming up from behind Katniss and surprisingly he doesn't look like he is about to attack. Maybe we will have allies after all. I see him talking to her, her talking back. They fend off the other tributes coming near them. I feel useless. They seem to have a slight argument and then Finnick swims towards me, fast and athletic, each stroke is perfect.

"Peeta, come on." He says he hold out his hand. On his wrist is the bangle that Effie had given Haymitch, a sign from our mentor. He wanted us to have allies and allies we were going to have. I don't resist as I get onto Finnick's back and let him tow me in towards the shore.

Katniss grabs my hand and helps pull me up. "_Hello again." _I say with a sweet kiss on her lips, "_We've got allies."_ I say and look to Finnick.

"_Yes. Just as Haymitch intended." _Katniss answers. I look over to all the other tributes around the Cornucopia and then others swimming and still others on their plates afraid of the blue waves lapping at their feet.

"_Remind me, did we make deals with anyone else?"_ I ask wondering if Katniss would let her trust go out to more than me and one other person in this arena.

_"Only Mags. I think." _Katniss says with a head nod towards the strong woman making her ways steadily through the water. I am reminded of watching her Games. The only one that was truly determined to win. I am reminded of the old woman at the reaping coming up to take the place of a crazy girl in love. This woman swimming towards us was truly amazing and it was my honor to be her ally.

"_Well, I can't leave Mags behind. She's one of the few people who actually likes me." _Says Finnick, as if we would say no to her being our ally.

"_I've got no problem with Mags,"_ says Katniss, "_Especially now that I see the arena. Her fishhooks are probably our best chance of getting a meal."_

"_Katniss wanted her on the first day." _I tell Finnick. I leave out that I looked up to her a lot and really in my heart of hearts I wanted her as an ally as well.

"_Katniss has remarkably good judgment." _Says Finnick as he reaches into the water and pulls Mags out. She says something, but it sounds as if it's from a different language. Finnick understands it though, apparently the belts we had on were flotation devices.

Finnick hoists Mags onto his back and we begin to run. We run on the land spokes towards the dark forest that rises up from the sand. It's moist in the cover of the trees and the air seems to stick to our bodies. There are bright colored flowers everywhere and the soil is dark and squishy. I saw a picture of something like this in a schoolbook quite a while ago; a jungle.

I'm not sure why I remember the name of it or why I even retained any information of it. It's just that my whole life the only landscape I saw was the landscape of Twelve and I guess it's always interesting to see something you've never seen before.

I take the head of our group, cutting out the vegetation that stands in the way of us with a long sharp knife. Part way through the day Katniss climbs a tree to see the scene of the blood bath. She stays for a while just staring blank ahead, I'm sure she sees bodies dead and blood running everywhere.

Finally she comes down her face showing a little bit of sorrow. What ever she just saw there was no good. "_What's going on down there Katniss? Have they all joined hands? Taken a vow of nonviolence? Tossed the weapons in the sea in defiance of the Capitol?"_ Asks Finnick, his words becoming more and more intense with each question. It'd be a good idea if the Gamemakers were afraid of killing tributes themselves, but they aren't and they've made that very clear in past years.

"_No." _she says, the word flat. Is that what she expected after last night? A vow of nonviolence. No matter what the tributes did the Gamemakers would always have their way in the games.

"_No, because what ever happened in the past is in the past. And no one in this arena is a victor by chance." _He pauses and looks over to me, "_Except maybe Peeta." _I know what he means, although it does hurt a little. I fought for the title just like anyone else.

I see Katniss give Finnick a deadly look, the same look I'm sure she gave Cato before she shot the arrow at his hand. I'm afraid that our alliance will be ended before it even started. What ever Katniss is thinking right now she needs to know that Finnick can help us.

I do the only thing I know to do and step in between the two of them. We don't need a fight right now. Katniss's face changes to another look. I have successfully stopped the battle that could have just occurred.

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	55. Chapter 55

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 55**

I'm not sure when I stop paying attention. It just happens. The swipe of the knife against the many vines becomes mechanical and I just keep on walking forward. I don't listen to the almost non-existent chatter that goes on behind me occasionally. I don't look at the birds singing out loud happy songs. I just look ahead.

We had a clear mission; to find water. Obviously the water surrounding the Cornucopia, we could not drink, it was salt water. That would only end up making us sick. I hadn't learned much from my mother, but for whatever reason she had told us about salt water. There had to be water somewhere, a year with just a bunch of dehydrated tributes would not be a good year. This year had to be especially exciting for it was the Quarter Quell.

Soon enough I stop even hearing the chatter behind me and the songs being sung overhead. Step, slice, step. Keep on moving. I should have paid attention; maybe then I would have noticed something. It's pretty quick how fast I'm thrown back. I lose consciousness instantly, my mind takes over.

I'm don't know what I'm experiencing at first it's only when I notice somehow that my heart isn't as persistent as it usually is that I realize I'm dying. I'm not sure what it would feel like to be in my final moments, but it's almost peaceful.

...

"You see that girl?" My dad stands behind me on his knees. He still has his apron on; it was a hurry getting out of the house. I follow his finger to a girl, small and delicate and even though I had no real definition of the word; beautiful. Her hair is in two small braids. She looks happy.

I nod, "I used to be in love with her mother." My father says. "She fell in love with another man, a coal miner."

"But Dad, why would she love anyone, but you?" I ask, sure that my dad, the baker, was the best person ever. It took a lot not to love him.

"_Because when he stops to sing even the birds stop to listen_."

...

For a split second my hearing comes back. I hear Katniss frantic, screaming my name and just behind that I hear a bird singing.

...

I knew only one thing; I had to get that bread to Katniss. My mom would not stand for me just giving it to her. Only seconds ago did she just yell at her for looking in the trash. Before I devise a plan I look out the window, she looks broken, at the edge of a cliff. I'll get punished for what I'm about to do, but it does not matter.

...

I feel pressure against my chest. I know my mind is trying to help with whoever is trying to get my heart beating again. Part of me wants whoever is doing this to stop; another part of me wants to live, even if it only is just a few more days.

...

"_I volunteer!"_ Her words echo loudly across the town center. I watch as Prim struggles to stay with her sister. I see her, her face trying to stay composed, but I also see the tears that are way deep down inside of her.

I'm not sure why I'm not the first one to start the three-finger-salute, but whoever did it was wise. She deserves the whole crowd's respect, even the whole country. I pray silently that if she is to die, then I must as well.

...

The pressure is becoming more intense and I feel whoever this is forcing oxygen into my lungs. I can hear Katniss again, though I'm pretty sure she says nothing.

...

Deep in the cave we are both better. The cut across Katniss's head is healing and my leg is no longer infected. This is the first time we are both fully aware of what is going on. I know soon our lips will meet and it will be perfect just like every time before. I let it happen. Our lips meet and I feel that fire that was in me every time I looked at her rekindle.

...

I feel myself begin to breathe on my own and my heart begin to circulate again and my brain begin to go back into its normal routines, but before I become aware again one more memory comes.

...

Katniss in the hands of sleeping syrup holds my hand and tightly. For once I feel as if I'm wanted, but I know I can't completely listen to it because it could very well be the medicine speaking. I feel her begin to fall asleep and I almost get ready to leave. She must feel me shift my weight towards the door, for her grip becomes tighter.

"_Stay with me." _She whispers pleading with her drug-induced slur. I know it could be the drugs talking, but behind all that there had to be truth.

In all honesty I answer, "_Always."_

_..._

I cough as I breathe in my own oxygen; Katniss is right next to me waiting for my eyes to open. I'm happy that whoever kept my heart beating did because I'd much rather spend my last moments with Katniss than in the memory of her.

"_Peeta?" _she whispers as if she were to speak too loudly I would go away again and this time not be able to be revived. I feel her fingers come across my forehead in a swipe. Moving away the hair that is sure to be covering my eyes.

I don't find the strength to open up my eyelids for a few seconds, but finally with the help of knowing Katniss was right beside me, I open them. "_Careful." _I say my voice sounding as if I had years of damage on my body, "_There's a force field up ahead." _

Katniss lets out a polite laugh, but trails of worried tears work across her face. "_Must be a lot stronger than the one on the Training Center roof. I'm all right though, just a little shaken." _Surely if I wasn't fine, my mind wouldn't have given me those beautiful memories.

"_You were dead! Your heart stopped!"_ she exclaims, the adrenaline from the past minutes comes into her voice, I really had her worried. Sobs begin to rack her body as she thinks of what this could have been, these moments easily could have been the last moments she ever saw me as the hovercraft flew my body away from here.

_"Well, it seems to be working now." _She keeps on sobbing. All I can think is that I'm glad I made it through this or Katniss would never had been able to survive these Games. "_It's all right, Katniss." _I try to calm her down, but it does not stop. I feel the wear this near death experience has taken on my body and all I really want to do is sleep.

I'm worried that if Katniss doesn't stop this soon then she'll be like this for the remainder of the games. I will her to stop and my body becomes more tired as the seconds tick on.

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**I hope you liked it! I posted twice today! Yay! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out!**


	56. Chapter 56

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 56**

Finnick suggest we make camp right here and now, but it's not a good idea, even though my body is screaming at me to take a rest because only minutes ago it was in overdrive. I take a deep breath and stand up. Katniss looks at me with weary eyes, as if her look could keep me from falling.

Once I'm standing up and it's clear I'm fine, Katniss moves to organize her weapons. I realize that the person that kept my heart beating when my body clearly couldn't was none other than Finnick. I'm not sure why my mind couldn't put that together until now. I want to say I'm thank you, but for once I'm not sure how to put it into words. Because of this I tell him thank you with my eyes and a slight tilt of my heavy head. He looks back his eyes giving me the same look as if to say, "Could I have done anything else?"

I wonder why he did it, surely Katniss would never be able to revive me and Mags sits on the ground picking at the moss that covers it. Finnick was the only one here that had the training to do it, but why? He could have left me to die; it was only denying the inevitable. Maybe he knew that if I wasn't here Katniss could not stand to be his ally. Maybe he knew he was not quick enough to pull out his trident to deflect her arrow.

That alone did not seem like a great enough reason though. Finnick knew he was strong; he took pride in his skills. I am sure he believes that he could kill Katniss, so why didn't he just let me fall out of the picture? My mind becomes foggy from thinking to much, besides I see Katniss start to work the weapons into her belt, it's almost time to start moving.

"_I'll take the lead." _Says Katniss. Immediately a red flag goes off in my head. Right now I trust Finnick, but I wouldn't be able to deflect him if he tried to attack Katniss from behind and if someone were to come in front of us she would be the first target.

I raise my hand up as fast as I can, but before words come out of my mouth Finnick speaks, "_No, let her do it." _His face looks confused for a second before he speaks again, "_You knew that force field was there, didn't you right at the last second? You started to give a warning," _He pauses for her to give her head a slight nod, "_How did you know?"_

Katniss could usually think on her feet when it comes to action, but when it came to words she had to think of it. I noticed her slight hesitation before she spoke, she didn't want some one to hear the truth, and I'm not sure whether it was the Capitol or Finnick. "_I don't know. It's almost as if I could hear it. Listen." _We all pause and try to hear this sound that Katniss talks about, but I know there is no sound. For her sake I go along with it, well somewhat anyways.

"_I don't hear anything." _I say.

"_Yes, it's like when the fence around District twelve is on, only much, much quieter." _I start to believe her, because almost her whole life she had to listen for the buzz of that fence, this very well could be true. "_There!" _she exclaims, "_Can you hear it? It's coming from right where Peeta got shocked." _

"_I don't hear it, either, but if you do, by all means take the lead." _Says Finnick motioning his hands out in front for her to take her spot.

And then like whenever Katniss lies, she takes it too far. Like when the Peacekeepers came telling her the fence was off, she always tried too hard to make a person believe it, "_That's weird," _she says with the slight cock of her head, "_I can only hear it out of my left ear." _

And because I know she can't back out of it now, I play along, "_The one the doctors reconstructed?" _

Katniss begins to go off of that, but Mags becomes impatient and urges us on. She no longer rides on Finnick's back, but walks with a cane that is just a really large stick. It is probably a branch from one of the many foreign trees that grow here.

I know for sure that Katniss can't hear the force field when she starts throwing exotic nuts into to see if they will fly back or not. I notice Mags picking up the crisp things before anyone else does. I don't think twice about it, which is probably bad on my part, for when Katniss realizes it she turns around quickly and scolds her. Finnick doesn't care just like I don't. If they truly are poisonous as Katniss says they might be we'll find out in a matter of time.

We walk in silence for a long time. The muggy air is hot and sticky and my tired body doesn't help either. To say the least I'm happy when she suggests we take a break. Katniss climbs to the top of a tree again and comes down with some not so exciting news.

The arena was a dome and kept us in a tight circle. The only water she could see was the stuff surrounding the Cornucopia. I hate to give up and say that's the only water here, but that sure is what it looks like.

We decide to stop being at the edge of the force field and to move down and look for water at a different level. We'll be closer to all the other tributes, but we had to find that water if we were going to survive more than a few days.

The sun is not very close to going down when we decide we can't move on any longer. We start to make camp, with our throats dry it seems it will be a long night. Finnick and Mags weave great mats out of grass. I admire how well they are with so many skills. In District Twelve all you had to learn to do was mine coal, but in other Districts there was so many more skills one could pick up. For a second I envy that I was not born in a better District, but I remind myself that Twelve was my home and I would not trade it for the world.

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**I hope you liked it! I'm really sorry I didn't post yesterday, I haven't been very good this past week. Hopefully I'll do better this week. Help me want to write more? Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	57. Chapter 57

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

* * *

**Ch. 56**

Katniss leaves to go hunting and although I hate the idea of her being by herself she won't let me go along. Something about being too noisy. I know she likes to hunt alone, but that's a dangerous thing to do in the Games.

While she's gone Finnick and Mags transform our camp into more of a home. They create a shelter and when they notice I'm not helpful with weaving things they have me throw nuts into the force field to fry them, we were all too scared to try them raw.

No one says much after Katniss leaves. Once she's gone for probably thirty minutes Finnick speaks up. "So how long have you two known about the baby?" He asks. I wonder if he actually believes this elaborate lie or if he really wants the Capitol to believe it as well.

"A couple weeks. We were excited for a second until we realized what was coming." I say, my voice sullen. If I didn't know the truth I might have believed the words I let fall out of my mouth so easily.

"At least you got a couple months of bliss." This time I hear the sadness in Finnick's voice as I continually throw nuts into the force field and as he works on putting together our shelter. I almost ask him about Annie, but decide against it, I had a feeling the Capitol didn't know about his true romance.

"Sometimes I'm thankful for it." I whisper, my voice quiet because in all reality the Capitol did not deserve to know how I felt about it, even if it was a lie.

"Be thankful," says Mags, and even though it's hard to make out in her thick accent, I do. It's those two simple words that stop the conversation and leave me thinking.

I should be thankful for all this time I have had with Katniss. I had a lifetime of memories with her, and yeah maybe a lot of them weren't ideal, but they were with her. I think over the past few months and I don't think of my sorrow as we knew we had to go back into the Games. I thought of all the time we spent together, training, working harder. I was thankful. Very thankful.

Katniss comes back about an hour after she left, her face doesn't show any sign that she had found water. She carries a plump rat looking thing, that didn't look very appealing, but meat was meat.

"_No. No water. It's out there though. He knew where it was," _she hold up the giant dead rodent that she has in her hands, "_He'd been drinking recently when I shot him out of a tree, but I couldn't find his source. I swear, I covered every inch of the ground in a thirty-yard radius." _She sounds very disappointed that even after all her efforts there was no water to be found.

I feel my stomach growl and my tongue yearn for something more than the roasted nuts, "_Can we eat him?"_ I ask, wondering if this rat was even a worthy kill.

"_I don't know for sure. But his meat doesn't look that different from a squirrel's. He ought to be cooked…"_ Katniss stops, surely we couldn't eat this meat raw, but everything surrounding us was wet, it would take ages to start a fire. I look at the charred nuts that sit in a hand woven basket made by the hands of Mags.

The force field would cook it perfectly and would take much less time than the fire would even take to make. I tell them my idea and cut off a chunk of the meat. I stick the fat stuff onto a stick and let it fly into the invisible shield. It's thrown back, cooked to perfection. They all applaud me on my wonderful idea.

I don't talk much the rest of the night as Finnick questions Katniss about the rat like creature we were eating. We all deem it the tree rat.

The sun goes down too fast and as we settle down onto our mats I position myself close to Katniss. I grab her hand and give her a tight squeeze, I can see the pure worry in her eyes.

We watch as the seal come over and the pictures of the now dead tributes come over the sky. The only person's face who I'm saddened to see is Seeder, who in all ways was probably one of the kindest tributes here, and Haymitch seemed to like her as well.

We all lay in silence none of us daring to speak or sleep. We wait for something to happen although I'm sure we would be just as happy if we could stay like this for the rest of the Games.

It's a while before we see a parachute come down to us. None of us move towards it as if we're not sure it's even for us.

"_Whose is it, do you think?" _Katniss finally speaks. Finnick says we should give it to me because of my near death experience today, I move towards it, wondering what our mentors have given us.

I untie the parachute with steady hands, but it seems I can't untie it fast enough. What we find is disappointing; a small silver tube with a lip at one end.

"_What is it?"_ Katniss asks as we all ask the same question in our head. None of us, not even Mags who has years of experience knows what it is. We all try different things with it, but nothing seems to work.

I know it has to be something, tributes aren't sent gifts just because it's fun. In many cases they are the thing that determines someone's life or death. People spent their money to send us this gift it had to help somehow, pretty soon we've all given up.

We all lay back down and because I see the stress of the day etched across Katniss's face just like her mother's, I begin to massage her back. We all settle back down onto our mats and hope that soon we will figure out what exactly this thing is.

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**I hope you liked it! In all honesty I wasn't going to write a chapter today, but I did, because I figured my lovely readers deserved it. Thanks for sticking with me even when I don't post every day AND still reviewing, for those that do review. :)Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	58. Chapter 58

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes are in italics.**

* * *

**Ch. 57**

I wait, in the silence, for sleep to find me, but strangely it doesn't. Even though my body yearns for rest and my mind is too drowsy to think complete thoughts, it still does not come. I try as hard as I can, but my mind does not shut off. I can feel everyone else with the same dilemma or maybe if they don't want to sleep they are trying to conjure up a name for the small silver tube.

I stare up at the roof of our shelter, perfectly crafted, and done with in an hour. I'm wowed by the skill that shows through in it. Finally when my eyelids become too heavy I close my eyes, but still sleep does not come.

"_A spile!" _Katniss drops my hand and I see her fling right up, the word she says isn't foreign and reminds me what that silver thing is. We used it on the tree in our back yard, to get sap, although the stuff we got wasn't good, my mother still made syrup from it each year.

"_What?" _says Finnick. I remember District Four from the short time we spent there, very few trees sprouted from the ground and I doubt one could ever make syrup from them.

"_It's a spile," _says Katniss, explaining her revelation. She holds the small device in her hand as if it were gold, this very well could be the source of our water, "_Sort of like a faucet. You put it in a tree and sap comes out. Well the right kind of tree." _These trees surrounding us looked nothing like the rough trees back home.

"_To make syrup, but there might be something else inside these trees."_ All of us stand up instantly and hurry to the closest tree. Finnick starts an attempt to hammer the small silver device into the tree, but Katniss holds her hand out to stop him.

"_Wait. You might damage it. We need to drill a hole first." _We notice quickly that there is nothing to drill a hole with, but Mags taps my arm to get my attention. She holds out the awl that earlier today she had demanded from Katniss. I ram the awl into the bark and it goes in quite deep, but the hole isn't thick enough to get the spile into it. Finnick and I try making the hole bigger so it will. Finally it is big enough and Katniss carefully works the spile into the hole.

I don't think I've ever seen anything quite so beautiful as this. The water takes a while to finally come out, but when it finally does I feel nothing but joy. We each take our own turns drinking the water, wetting our dry tongues, and splashing our sweaty faces. I don't think it gets much better than this in the arena.

Finally with water in my system, my body rests. It's nice.

I feel someone shaking me and an uncomfortable feeling coming onto my skin. Then it's more than uncomfortable, it actually stings and it does not feel good at all. It only takes seconds for my eyes to adjust, but when they finally do I see a scary white fog coming onto us and begin to consume us. This is no good.

"_Run! Run!"_ Katniss screams and her voice is full of panic, we begin to move, one fast step at a time. Although I don't move fast enough, Katniss urges me on. We literally are in a fog and my mind feels in a fog as well. I had waken from my deep sleep too suddenly and even though I tried I could not move my legs as fast as Finnick was.

I see Katniss look at the fog and worry for her life. I want to tell her to go ahead, but my voice isn't corresponding with my body. It's horrid. Katniss tries to help, but it doesn't help when my leg gets caught up in some plant. I sprawl forward and the fog finds me. It does not feel good, my muscles seem to be leaving my body. In only a little bit I will not be able to move, and then I will not be able to live. "_Peeta—" _something cuts Katniss off and she yanks me off the ground, forward away from the fog. I feel my mind begins to become blank. I can no longer think.

Finnick comes back and they try to help me walk, but the efforts are no good, no good at all. I only feel what is going on, because I cannot see. I think Finnick picks me up, and that's when my mind goes blank.

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**I hope you liked it. Sorry this is so short, I have a rule that my chapters have to be at least 1,000 words long and I broke it tonight, because I really do not have the time to do it. I'm telling you guys in advance there will not be a chapter tomorrow because it's Thanksgiving, I would be very thankful for your reviews if you reviewed! Also the next chapter I post will be longer than normal to make up for this one, I feel really bad for writing such a short one! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! Happy Thanksgiving even if you don't live in America! ~boywithbreadlover**


	59. Chapter 59

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 59**

The black out last seconds, I'm saddened it doesn't last longer because this pain in my body is great. I cannot control what my legs do, half of my face feels as if it is no longer there, I do not like it. Finnick forces something into my hand as he runs, I don't pay attention to what it is only that I have to hold onto it.

I hear words, though I cannot distinguish them. I only notice one thing, Mags runs into the fog instead of away from it. I'm not sure why she does it or what moves her to do it, but a cannon rings seconds later. The strong woman I looked up to was gone, and there was nothing I could do about it.

I feel Finnick begin to move again, but the fog still leaches onto my skin. I hang on tight to the object that's in my hand, knowing that surely Finnick needs it.

I'm not sure how I end up on the ground; my motionless body sprawled partially on top of Finnick. I feel Katniss trip over us as well. I wait for something to happen, I'm not exactly sure what, but something bad. Maybe I am waiting for death to find me or a cannon to ring out, just something.

My mind although still foggy, strangely begins to become clear again. I hear something come out of one of our mouths, but I can't distinguish who it is or what they said. Then more clearly I hear from Katniss, "_It stopped." _

I don't find what I'm expecting to find, more fog progressing on us. I find the fog disappearing, far away from us. I find the strength to move my body off of Finnick's. I lay on my back up at the thick canopy overhead, over in my peripheral vision I see something moving. It's an animal I've never seen before, but I do have a name for them.

"_Mon-hees," _the word doesn't come out correctly, but I see the others look out at them. The monkeys don't do anything; only observe us like we do them. When I'm sure they aren't danger I realize we can't stay here forever. We'll either be found by other tributes or slowly die from the impact this deadly fog has done to our bodies.

It takes all the strength in me to begin moving, but finally I get up on my knees. I decide that's the best I'll get and begin to crawl. I feel Katniss and Finnick begin to do the same behind me. After awhile I feel the soft squishy soil turn to course sand against my hands. We are on the beach, but I keep going until I reach the water, but instead of relief that I hope the water will give me, I only feel pain.

For some odd reason I leave my hand in, for what I'm not sure, but after seconds of excruciating pain, I feel something else; healing. I move the rest of my arm into the water and the same happens, I see a stringy fog coming out of my skin and into the water, it's leaving my body. The muscles that were held captive by the stuff begin to work again.

My mind still feels foggy and so before I move my legs into the water I dunk my head in. I leave it there until my mind feels clear again, and then because I have to, I open my eyes to get the fog that had made it's way into them. A lot of it is painful, but in the end I know I will feel all-better, it will be as if this last hour didn't happen when I was all done.

Then I realize there is something that holds us to that horrid fog, Mags, she's gone, she no longer lives. I know she had to die, but I wasn't ready for it to be so soon. I barely knew her, but I feel so much sorrow for her death. She will be missed.

I'm still working on leaching the fog away from my body when Katniss moves to help Finnick. He looks dead, which I hate to say, but his body looks lifeless. When I feel well enough to help her I begin to cut off his jumpsuit to get the poison out faster. Getting water to him with our hands isn't efficient by the time we get to him most of the water has leaked out. I dig through the sand and find two large shells that will hold the water mush faster.

He stays lifeless for a long time, except when he gives the occasional moan, which I'm sure he only does to remind himself that he is still alive. "_We've got to get more of him into the water," _Katniss whispers into my ear as if others were to hear us. I notice that if others were to come we would not be able to defend ourselves very well, we were tired and Finnick would most definitely not be able to fight.

Katniss and I move his feet slowly into the water, and we cleanse him bit by bit. Finally he begins to open his eyes and even lifts his arms on top of the seawater, which forces a smile out of both Katniss and I.

Finally it's time for his head and I warn him that it will be the hardest part, but that also when it's done, all the pain will be gone. Katniss and I support him as he sits up. I never thought I'd ever be helping Finnick Odair like this. He begins to get the poison out of his head. I have to say I feel a sense of accomplishment.

"_I'm going to try to tap a tree," _says Katniss, working the silver spile out of her belt. Water does sound good, but the trees aren't close enough for me to protect her. It'd be best if she stayed with Finnick.

"_Let me make the hole first. You stay with him. You're the healer."_ I get up and look for a good strong tree that would have a lot of water. I find a good one and begin to make a hole in it that the spile would fit in. It takes effort, but the promise of water that this ensures makes me work harder.

I hear Finnick and Katniss walk up before me after a good ten minutes of picking on the tree. I hear them stop. I wonder why they don't come nearer. "_Peeta, I need your help with something." _

Why did she need me now? The hole was almost big enough for the spile, "_Okay, just a minute. I think I've just about got it." _I put my knife into the whole and move it around, perfect size, "_Yes, there. Have you got the spile?" _

_ "I do. But we've found something you'd better take a look at." _Katniss's voice sounds calculated and not at all normal, she's trying to get my attention for something, but what? "_Only move toward us quietly, so you don't startle it." _It? Startle what? I decide it's best to listen to her. I turn away from the tree.

"_Okay," _I say, but as I walk away from it the hair on the back of my neck begins to stand up, and some force moves to turn me around. Just one look, one second, and I see them. It takes one second for the orange monkeys to attack.

One second and I'm scared for my life.

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**I hope you liked it! I will write an even longer one, I promise, cause the last one was not that great. Also, if you haven't already, check out my one shots? They're really short. Also in other news you guys are amazing! I just recently surpassed 200 reviews on this, way more than The Fate Games has! Thank you! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	60. Chapter 60

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

* * *

**Ch. 60**

I swing my knife out instantly and start slicing the monkeys that try to attack me. I feel as if I can't kill them fast enough as more and more come. I hack and hack against the orange bodies, was it only an hour ago that I had thought these things were harmless?

The monkeys come quicker and some try and bite into me, but my knife hits them before they can. Their orange fur is rough against my skin. I do notice they aren't normal monkeys, they wouldn't attack this viciously if they truly were; they're mutts. Capitol made, a want to kill us programmed into their DNA.

I don't pay attention to Katniss and Finnick much because if I where to look away for even one second I knew I would be dead, but I hear Katniss call to me, "_Peeta! Your arrows!" _

I notice Katniss's lack of her weapon and remember the sheath that lies on my back. I can't leave her defenseless, even if it means the time I will use to get the arrows to her could mean my death.

It happens before I have time to react. I see the mutt flying through the air one second and then Katniss running towards me another. Then out of nowhere a perfect stranger flings herself in front of me. Her body protects me, but she is not able to protect herself.

The morphling from Six, sick and bloody, ending her life to keep me going. I don't think as I kill the monkey that sunk it's teeth into her chest. This sickens me. She died for me, I don't like it, I should have died. I brace myself for more to come. I want them to come, I want to kill more, and maybe somehow it will heal her.

"_Come on then! Come on!" _But the monkeys run away, I'm sure it's not in fear of us. They are being called somewhere, away from the death of this sick girl.

"_Get her. We'll cover you." _I pick up the body of the fragile girl. She was lovely at art. Her stroke was even more perfected than mine; I had admired the work she had shown me. She was beaten down by years of drugs and fear of her Games. Maybe she was ready to die, maybe she was ready for a way out.

I bring her carefully to the sand, she breaths deeply, holding onto the last couple moments of her life. Once she's down on the warm sand, Katniss cuts her wet suit. Underneath is nothing good, if there was hope for survival before, there was definitely none now. Blood pours endlessly out of her chest where the mutts' teeth had sunk in.

She doesn't need us working hard over her body, trying to bring back what was left of her for no reason; she needs a way out of this world. A good farewell.

I kneel beside her and begin to stroke the pieces of her hair off her face. I begin my voice small. This shouldn't be hard, after all both of us did art to take away our nightmares. "_With my paint box at home, I can make every color imaginable. Pink. As pale as baby's skin. Or as deep as rhubarb. Green like spring grass. Blue that shimmers like ice on water." _The girl, so innocent, looks deep into my eyes. I hold onto her eyes as I see her soul begin to slowly leave her body.

"_One time, I spent three days mixing paint until I found the right shade for sunlight on white fur. You see, I kept thinking it was yellow, but it was much more than that. Layers of all sorts of color. One by one." _I pause to find her hand; even through all the pain she must be in, it make swirls with her blood on her skin. Painting was all she was any more.

"_I haven't figured out a rainbow yet. They come so quickly and leave so soon. I never have enough time to capture them. Just a bit of blue here or purple there. And then they fade away again. Back into the air." _

She lifts her hand, which shakes from pain, into mine. I watch as her bloodied fingers paint something beautiful into my hand. It's shaky and hard to make out, but completely wonderful. This girl whose life must have been a nightmare, finds the strength to paint a flower onto my hand in her final moments.

"_Thank you. That looks beautiful." _I whisper to her. Somewhere deep in her she finds the strength to give me a smile. I see her eyes go blank, her hands fall, and her lungs let out one final breath. Then the sound of the unsettling cannon. I would never be able to forget this girl that saved my life.

I pick up her weightless body and carry it out into the water. She looks at peace as she floats out into the water. She was finally out of the constant nightmares that life had plagued her with. It's common for victors to turn to a drug, like Haymitch with alcohol. I've never seen so much beauty in those addicted though. She had found what to live for; the stroke of the paintbrush. Only a true artist could admire that.

I still wonder why she had risked her life for me, why so suddenly she had jumped out in front of me. We had talked a couple times during training, but not enough to want to risk our lives for the other. People seem adamant about trying to keep me alive, but why? I guess I'll figure out sometime soon.

I turn around and walk back to Katniss as the hovercraft comes and takes her body away from this horrid place. The events of the day were full. I couldn't imagine what else this arena was going to bring.

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**I hope you liked it! So I know the last chapters weren't that great, which I have no reason for at all, I thought the last one was good, but I was told that it wasn't my best work. I'm really sorry for that, I'm not sure why I haven't been able to put out my best work. Tell me what's wrong please so I can improve and fix mistakes that I have made. Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	61. Chapter 61

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

* * *

**Ch. 61**

There's a moment of silence for the poor damaged addict from Six. Katniss doesn't speak, I don't speak; we just wait for someone to talk. Finnick walks up beside us, blood-drenched arrows in hand.

"_Thought you might want these," _Finnick drops the weapons down at Katniss's feet. She picks them up and takes them to the water. If only she had that sheath of arrows in the first place, then that monkey would have been dead before it had taken away the Morphlings life.

"_Where did they go?" _asks Katniss as she comes back with the cleaned arrows.

"_We don't know exactly. The vines shifted and they were gone." _I'm reminded of the wolf mutts; how once the cannon sounded for Cato's death they had leaped back underground, back to their creators. The monkeys seemed to do the same thing. I wonder how they kept such wild killing machines tame.

All of us look into the jungle, as if we could see where they went, but there are no monkeys in sight, they're no longer in the arena. I feel the exhaustion of the day wear on me, my body feels numb, my mind useless.

Where the fog droplets fell on my skin itchy scabs begin to sprout out. Once I notice it, my hand flings automatically too them, trying to make the itch that may never stop go away for just a second, "_Don't scratch," _Katniss commands, "_You'll only bring infection. Think it's safe to try for the water again?" _

This instantly brings my attention from my itchy skin to the tree that I had tapped before the attack. I felt like a dog that could only keep its attention on one thing. My throat feels dry, and I feel my head to become drowsy from lack of water.

We all stand up and walk as fast as we can, which isn't fast, to the tree. I see blood on the ground, but I don't pay attention to it. I take one look in the trees for any wandering monkeys and then begin to work the spile in.

Water seems too pour infinitely out of the tree. We all quench our thirst; wash our bloody faces, and feel the water against our itchy scabs. Once we're all good temporarily we find shells and fill them for later. We head back to the shore.

I fall asleep almost instantly, I can hear Finnick and Katniss argue over who can stay and keep watch, but I don't comprehend much of it. I fall asleep completely when I feel Katniss's warm body next to mine.

"Peeta, come here, it's nice, almost freeing." My eyes must be foggy for the scene around me is almost blurry. The morphling holds her hand out to mine, but something in me knows not to grab it.

On the other side of me in a much clearer picture stands Katniss her hand held out as well, "Peeta don't leave me. Not yet." She says. I want to grab it, but something holds me in debate. I see Rue step up next to the Morphling and Mags too, and then the girl that died because of the berries I had picked, Foxface.

People start appearing next to Katniss too, Marcus, Haymitch, and strangely enough, Finnick.

"Peeta there is no suffering here," Says Mags, she looks younger than what she looked like when she ran into the fog. All the stress has left her face.

"Peeta, stay alive." Urges Haymitch saying his go to words of advice. I feel cut in half. While part of me knows I must stay with Katniss and my family another part of me wants to give in to this peaceful place that meets me in my dreams.

I have a sudden urge to pick and pick now, I look at all the forgotten tributes, they don't look tortured or pained, but completely happy. Then I look at the other side, they may not be happy, but they're willing to fight with me.

"_Peeta." _Says Katniss, "_Peeta, wake up." _I make my decision and jump over to Katniss.

My eyes fly open. What's before me frightens me so much I jump back. Two faces with a green goo on their faces stare at me. It actually takes me a few moments to notice that it's Katniss and Finnick. They start rolling around in the sand laughing. I sit with horror on my face because a part of me actually thought I was being attacked.

Soon a parachute silences them. It holds bread, the green tinted seaweed kind from District Four. It's for Finnick. He holds it in his hands, staring at it, examining it. I'm sure he's reminded of home and Annie watching this from her television.

He looks up from the loaf in his hand and I expect him to say something of missing home, but all he says is, "_This will go well with the shellfish." _He goes off to clean the meat while Katniss comes over to me with a container of ointment.

"Haymitch is really being nice this year. I just had to ask for this and it was sent. It doesn't look good, but it makes the itch go away." She helps me lather the ugly colored ointment onto the scabs all over my body. We don't talk as we work; only silence accompanies us. Which give me time to think about the dream I had just had.

I had this battle for a while, whether it would just be better to die than keep on fighting. Hadn't I wanted them just to let me die only yesterday? My decision was clear, I had made it long ago on my first train to the Capitol. I was getting Katniss out alive. I can't stop trying now, not after all of these people are fighting to keep me alive. Finnick started my heart beating again, Mags ran into the fog when she could not be carried, and just hours ago the Morphling had died to save me. It was obvious I was supposed to live, just a little bit longer to keep Katniss going. But was that the reason everyone was dieing to keep me alive? It didn't add up. Something more is going on than I know about. I'm going to figure it out.

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**I hope you liked it! Okay so I want to say thank you to Ryebreyd who reminded me that this is my story and I'm not writing it to please you. I mean it makes me happy if you enjoyed it, but I'm not going to change anything for you, unless it's a really good idea of course. So Ryebreyd , your review really meant a lot to me, thanks again. Okay in Catching Fire news, have you guys seen the set photos? They are absolutely amazing and Finnick has on the gold bangle and everything, can't believe we have to wait a year! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	62. Chapter 62

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 63**

We eat the shellfish and bread in silence. We all look pretty disgusting with the coat of green ointment on our skin, but the itch seems to go away. As we sit on the beach we here a scream that seems far away from us in the jungle and then the ground rumbles.

A giant wave cascades out of the jungle and splashes into the water making the sea rise all the way up to us at the top of the shore. Our belongings that we had sitting around float into the water, but luckily we are able to grab all of them.

Nothing that comes out of the jungle seems to be good. I'd be happy if we stayed on the shore for the rest of our time in the arena. The only trouble is, we are out in the open, an easy target for someone standing in the jungle.

An unsettling cannon fires making it known that the giant wave had been the death of someone. That means half are gone, half still alive. My chances of getting Katniss home alive is greater now, if only I can stay alive long enough to help her get out. The scary things in the jungle seem to make that near impossible, but something in me tells me I can do it.

"_There," _says Katniss. She nods her head in a general direction, we follow her gaze. Three people walk towards us down the beach, though I don't think they see us. We hide in the shadows of the forest so they won't. They all look warn down by this crazy arena as well and they're covered from head to toe in the color red.

"_What is that?"_ I say, looking closer, were they even tributes? "_Or what? Muttations?" _Katniss begins to raise her arrow, but before she makes any move one of the things falls down on the ground. Another one gets so mad that it pushes the other down as well. I have a feeling their tributes, but they don't seem to get along well.

"_Johanna!" _calls out Finnick and runs down the beach towards the three covered in red. He looks excited to have found her, they must have been friends.

"_Finnick!" _I hear Johanna yell back. I know Katniss didn't like Johanna much during training, but she must be a good person if Finnick likes her.

"_What now?" _Asks Katniss. I look into the big looming trees overhead and try to think of the other things the Gamemakers might have hiding in here. I felt safer with Finnick and I actually trusted him.

"_We can't really leave Finnick." _I say, hoping she'll agree.

"_Guess not." _She complies, "_Come on, then." _She says a bit of anger tinting her voice. I wonder if she'll give Johanna a chance or if she's still mad at her for stripping in front of us in the elevator. She can't really hold it against her for that long.

We're not far from them when Katniss says to me, "_She's got Wiress and Beetee." _

_"Nuts and Volts?" _I question, when I talked to Johanna about them before she did not seem to care for them much. I pick up my pace wanting to hear the story of how they became allies, "_I've got to hear how this happened." _

By the time we reach them Johanna is explaining something to Finnick very quickly, "_We thought it was rain, you know, because of the lightning and we were all so thirsty. But when it started coming down, it turned out to be blood. Thick, hot blood. You couldn't see, you couldn't speak without getting a mouthful. We just staggered around, trying to get out of it. That' s when Blight his the force field."_ I'm guessing that's who the cannon had sounded for. Blight was Johanna's District partner, I didn't think they were close, but losing someone from your own District was always hard.

"_I'm sorry, Johanna." _Says Finnick.

"_Yeah, well, he wasn't much, but he was from home and he left me with these two." _Beetee lies on the ground, hardly even breathing, as she nudges him with her foot, "_He got a knife in the back at the Cornucopia. And her—" _All of us look down to Wiress who looks crazy, even crazier than Finnick's lover back home.

"_Tick, tock. Tick, tock." _She murmurs to herself as she walks in endless circles. I feel sorry for the poor woman, who had lost her mind in her first Games only to come into another one.

"_Yeah, we know. Tick, tock. Nuts is in shock." _She tells us. Johanna forces her to sit down, "_Just stay down, will you?" _It was a little harsh, I'm not surprised when Katniss gets mad at her.

"_Lay off her," _she says. This seems to make Johanna really mad.

"_Lay off her?" _she says between her teeth, obviously this arena had put a lot of stress on her, I could feel Johanna about to blow, "_Who do you think got them out of that bleeding jungle for you? You—"_ Her words are cut off by Finnick grabbing her and dunking her into the water multiple times. She still screams, but the words are hard to make out between dunks.

_"What did she mean? She got them for me?" _asks Katniss. Johanna still screamed in the background. It really did not make sense. I don't think Johanna would ever do anything just for Katniss unless she was forced to and we never asked her to bring us Wiress and Beetee.

"_I don't know. You did want them originally." _I say because in all honesty it is the only thing that makes complete since.

"_Yeah, I did." _Katniss pauses for a second and looks at the tired blood-covered victors, "_Originally, but I won't have them for long unless we do something." _She's right, Beetee is close to death and Wiress looks so lost that any one looking at her would take instant pity. Katniss and I take them together back to our camp. Hopefully we can get them better and then maybe we can figure out why Johanna had brought them to us.

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**I hope you liked it! I'm sorry I haven't been posting everyday, it's just I'd rather write when I want to than force myself to do it because the product wouldn't be as good. So, yeah that's my lame excuse, I hope you like it. Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	63. Chapter 63

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

* * *

**Ch. 63**

"_Get up. Get up, we have to move." _I feel Katniss shake my shoulder persistently. Something was wrong. I had only been asleep for a little while. The afternoon had persisted of trying to get Wiress and Beetee better, which had been a lot of Katniss doing that, though I had tried to help. Still my body was tired and rest would have been good, but something is the matter as Katniss wakes my resting body.

"The arena it's a clock," Says Katniss her voice rushed as she takes a quick survey of the round arena. "There's invisible hands that move around and each hour brings a new terror. The fog, the monkeys, the blood rain, they all happen at a certain time. It just started over again with the lightning, if we don't move the fog will reach us here." It all makes since now, why they had us confined to only a small area, why the cornucopia sat in the very middle, why the monkeys just seemed to disappear.

"Yeah right." Says Johanna, who looks comfortable on her spot in the sand.

"It makes since Johanna. Come on if it is true we'll have to move, and if it isn't we can never be too safe." Says Finnick, who pulls Johanna to her feet, who agrees reluctantly.

"Fine, but if we are moving for no reason. Then you better be sorry." She says to Katniss rather rudely, I'm guessing she liked her sleep.

We break off to gather what little possessions we have lying on the shore. Katniss goes to rouse Wiress who still slept even after our, not so quiet conversation. I go to get Beetee, who sleeps just as soundly as Wiress did. Once I wake him up, I try to pick him up, but he objects.

"_Wire," _He says. I assume he's just too beaten down or tired to say her whole name, or maybe it was just her nickname that he had for her.

"_She's right here. Wiress is fine. She's coming to." _I say, trying again to get him up, but still he struggles against my arms.

"_Wire," _He says again. Even though this day has made him weak his voice is still very insistent. I start to get impatient with him when Johanna walks up beside me.

"_Oh I know what he wants," _She walks over and picks up a tube covered in thick blood from the rain that they had been in, "_This worthless thing. It's some kind of wire or something. That's how he got cut. Running up to the Cornucopia to get this. I don't know what kind of weapon it's supposed to be. I guess you could pull off a piece and use it as a garrote or something. But really, can you imagine Beetee garroting somebody?" _Johanna blabbers on, but all I can think about is how glad I am I watched all the past games.

Every one in this arena had some sort of special talent or weapon, Beetee's happened to be electricity, "_He won his Games with wire. Setting up that electrical trap," _Understanding of your opponents was always good to know. I was surprised Johanna was clueless about this, "_It's the best weapon he could have." _I say.

Katniss proceeds to say something snarky to Johanna, I'm not sure what she was thinking, because it only makes Johanna more mad. For a second they stand and look as if they'll attack each other, I'm not sure what I would do if that happened. Jump in between them? But fortunately Finnick stops the stand off.

Finnick hands Beetee the wire. He now looks more than happy for me to pick him up. "_Where to?"_ I ask and look around the small circumference of the arena.

"_I'd like to go to the Cornucopia and watch. Just to make sure we're right about the clock," _Says Finnick. It's a good way to play it, we may not know if the theory is right, but at least if we're out on the Cornucopia we'll be safe from what ever dangers are in the jungle.

We begin to walk steadily down one of the strips that leads to the Cornucopia.

"Be careful, the careers might be hiding." Says Finnick, which makes all of us slow down a bit as we approach it step by step. Fortunately the area has no tributes in it. I place Beetee down into the shade provided by the big golden Cornucopia.

Beetee calls Wiress over and asks her to clean his wire; she happily grabs it and runs into the water. She starts to hum a song to herself, which is vaguely familiar, but I believe that it is something from my childhood.

"_Oh, not that song again," _Johanna complains, "_That went on for hours before she started the tick-tocking." _We are all staring at Wiress when she suddenly gets up from the water and looks over to a general area.

"_Two," _She says with the point of her finger.

"_Yes, look, Wiress is right. It's two o'clock and the fog has started." _Says Katniss. I look over and see the eerie fog creeping on top of the trees and on the beach. I could feel the stings that it caused me, though it was only memories, only the scabs are left from that fog.

"_Like clockwork," _I say amazed at how easily Wiress had figured out this arena, "_You were smart to figure that out, Wiress." _I say to her. Jealous at how she had figured out something so simply, yet none of us had even thought of it.

"_Oh, she's more than smart," _says Beetee, we all turn to him, surprised at how well he sounds. Only hours ago he looked as if he were at death's door. "_She's intuitive. She can sense things before anything else. Like a canary in your coal mines." _He nods his head towards Katniss and I. I only knew what the canary was because of our lessens in school, if it hadn't been for those I would have known nothing of the coal mines.

"_What's that?"_ Finnick turns to Katniss confused. Obviously she would be the one to better answer the question.

"_It's a bird that we take down into the mines to warn us if there's bad air," _She answers. I remember the yearly field trips down into the mines and the little bird that would always go with us.

"_What did it do, die?" _Asks Johanna, harshly, yet I could tell she was actually curious.

"_It stops singing first. That's when you should get out. But if the air's too bad, it dies, yes. And so do you." _Katniss's voice becomes shakier with each word; I could tell she didn't want to talk about bad air in the mines. I wonder if her dad had noticed the absence of the canary's voice before he had died, or if maybe he was completely oblivious.

After that we all stop talking. There was nothing else to keep the conversation going. We knew the arena was a clock, but where do we go from here on out? Do we stay on the Cornucopia the rest of the time and just wait for the other tributes to die and then start killing our allies? I don't think I could do that. I couldn't even kill Johanna. It was much easier last year; I did not know any of the tributes. I did not know if they had someone waiting at home or if they were really nice people. I knew nothing, absolutely nothing, and it was better that way.

To get my mind off of that I decide to make a map of the arena and what lays in each time spot. Then maybe after seeing that we can decide where to go from now on. Maybe it will help. Hopefully it will.

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**I hope you liked it! Okay, so sorry I didn't post for two days! Now for my plans, I plan to finish this before I get out for christmas break. When I do finish, I would like to continue on to do Mockingjay, but I think I'll take a break from it. Don't worry I'll give you guys the first chapter the day I finish this one, but for Christmas Break I'm going to take a Fanfiction break, if I finish this before then, which I plan to because it's almost over. So yeah that's my plan, hope you guys are okay with it. You should be spending time with your family over Christmas anyways, so that will be me telling you to do that! But that's three weeks from now, so don't worry! I will hopefully be going back to daily updates this week so I can finish by then. Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	64. Chapter 64

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 64**

I feel Katniss looking at the map I have just created. Studying it, as I have just been doing. "_Look at how the Cornucopia's positioned," _I say to her.

"_The tail points toward twelve o'clock," _she says, observing the exact same thing I had seen.

"_Right, so this is the top of our clock." _I take the stick I had drawn the arena with and mark a twelve where the tail points, "_Twelve to one is the lightning zone."_ I work my way around the clock marking what evils each one brings. I stop when I realize that I don't know what else the other spots hold.

"_And ten to eleven is the wave,"_ Katniss reminds me. I mark that one quickly. I wonder what else the other spots could hold. After watching the Games my whole life I could only imagine. The Gamemakers never failed to come up with something new and scary. All it took was evil minds and the technology to do it.

The others come and stand by us. We all stare at the big round map in front of us, "_Did you notice anything unusual in the others?" _asks Katniss to the others.

"The sick blood rain is all," answers Johanna with hatred in her voice. Not for Katniss, but the Gamemakers that poured the stuff down on her.

"_I guess they could hold anything." _Says Katniss, more to me than anybody else, because I had the stick and the question in my eye as to what else I could mark. I think about anything else we might know. Then I think of it, why'd we leave the shore again? Because we didn't want the fog to get to us again.

"_I'm going to mark the ones where we know the Gamemakers' weapon follows us out past the jungle, so we'll stay clear of those," _I say. It only takes seconds to indicate that we should steer clear of those spots at the time that the Gamemakers would release the weapons to kill us. I look at the map one more time to see if I missed anything and then I sit back away from it. "_Well, it's more than we knew this morning, anyway." _I say with a sense of accomplishment.

Then something happens, the atmosphere seems to change. I notice the absence of Wiress' voice before I turn my head to look; before I notice Katniss has already loaded her bow. Wiress is dead before any of us have time to react. The Careers have found us and they look almost happy about it, but we weren't going on with out a fight. We all fling into action, me slower than the others.

Luckily Finnick blocks an arrow that Brutus had sent straight towards my heart. I can't pay attention to the others around me, I just try and protect myself with the little weapons I have on me. Three sounds of the unsettling cannon. Three dead. I see the bodies, Wiress, innocent, and Gloss and Cashmere, born to kill finally losing at their own game.

Before I can think anymore the ground is flung out from under me. My body slams hard down onto the ground and I'm given a second to try and hold onto it before I'm flung into the water. It takes all my weakened strength to hold onto the spinning platform and then it stops and the chaos is over.

We sit in silence. That had just been a whirlwind. I'm sure the viewers at home were on the edge of their seats. Three tributes dead with in a matter of seconds. Gone. They were gone. Wiress was gone. She didn't deserve to be killed, but then again none of us really deserved to. Not even the brother and sister, whose bodies are floating through the water.

"_Where's Volts?"_ asks Johanna, although it didn't sound endearing I could tell she was worried. We all stand up quickly. I feel as if I might fall down when I finally get onto my feet, and it takes a while to finally get my balance. I look around in the small area that I could see that the Cornucopia wasn't blocking. I couldn't see Beetee anywhere.

"Over there!" Calls out Finnick. Beetee apparently couldn't hold onto the platform as well as we could. He barely stays afloat out in the water. Finnick swims out to get him. For whatever reason Johanna had brought him to us, we knew that we needed him for something. Something that Haymitch had wanted him for. It wasn't good to question what Haymitch wanted because he usually had the right idea.

I see Katniss looking frantically all around the Cornucopia and then she spots what she wants. I follow her gaze. Wiress' body lays floating in the water, wire still in hand. It was obviously important to Beetee and if the hovercraft comes and gets Wiress while she still has it, the wire will be taken out of the arena.

"_Cover me," _says Katniss to Johanna and I. She jogs out on one of the skinny strips. I watch as she frantically grabs the wire from Wiress' lifeless hand. Finnick drags in Beetee to the shore. He sets him up against the Cornucopia; he must have ingested a lot of water because he seems to cough it up endlessly.

Katniss comes back with the wire and sets it carefully in Beetee's lap. He doesn't look like it just then, but I'm sure he's thankful that Katniss had grabbed it for him. He looks at the wire, holding onto it as if it were his greatest possession. It very well might be that Wiress is now gone.

Katniss comes into my arms without a word. I feel her heart beating with mine. We were lucky. All of the others no longer had their District Partners. All of us look tired, but it must be much harder for them. They don't have someone from home to remind them that maybe someday, they will be back. And even if I knew I wouldn't get back, having Katniss right beside me I knew that she would be home. I knew that she would live another day outside of this arena and that gave me a strength that I could tell none of the others had anymore.

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**I hope you liked it! Two days in a row! That hasn't happened in a while! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	65. Chapter 65

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

* * *

**Ch. 65**

There was an argument about which way to go. Obviously the Gamemakers had gotten mad that we had figured out their system and decided to change around the clock. There was one thing we knew for sure, the things that happened in each time slot were the same, but we just didn't know where twelve o'clock was anymore.

We decide to go in a general direction and hope that it's the right way, it could mean our life and death, but hopefully we'll be able to figure it out before then. Before we enter the jungle where we chose to go we carefully look into it for any dangers.

_"Well, it must be monkey hour. And I don't see any of them in there," _I say not seeing any of the scary orange mutts, "_I'm going to try and tap a tree."_

I begin to walk towards one of the tall foreign trees, but Finnick stops me, "_No, it's my turn." _He says. I didn't know he was so adamant about putting a hole into a tree, but I let him step ahead of me.

"_I'll at least watch your back." _I say.

_"Katniss can do that." _Says Johanna, "_We need you to make another map. The other washed away." _She grabs a large leaf from one of the trees and hands it to me. Katniss hesitates for a second and looks at me, but then something makes her change her mind and she walks away with Finnick.

Johanna stands over me as I begin to sketch the giant clock that we are in with my knife. It feels weird to let Katniss go off alone, but I have gained the trust of Finnick. Should I trust Johanna? She was strong, but I'm sure I could at least stand against her. Katniss wasn't far off any ways, if she heard anything unusual she would run to me and Johanna would be dead within seconds.

A shift in the atmosphere seems to happen, for one second it is completely silent, and the next a blood-curdling scream breaks through the jungle. It takes a moment for me to realize that it comes from none of the tributes here. It takes another second for me to place it; I had only heard it once, at the reaping last year. The scream could only belong to Primrose Everdeen.

I don't try to run to the scream, but instead I look for Katniss because I know that she will be running towards the scream. They've never put people that aren't tributes into the arena and I doubt they'll start now. Prim isn't really here, they're putting the scream through a speaker or something, but that's the only time I heard it. The scream does not come again.

I run towards the jungle, but I run smack into an invisible wall. Katniss and Finnick are stuck in there I doubt the screaming really stopped. We were in the four o'clock time slot, after the monkeys comes screams from your loved ones, if being attacked wasn't enough.

"Nice one," Says Johanna as I slowly get up from being smacked in the head by the glass.

"They're just stuck in there for an hour?" I ask more as a rhetorical question than anything. If there's one thing I knew about Katniss, it's that she would do anything in her power for Prim not to be hurt. Those screams can break her. I know it. I also knew that Prim was probably at home, yelling to Katniss that it was fake.

Then we see them, Finnick and Katniss, in pain, not physically, but emotionally. They look lost. "Katniss, stay strong, come on. It's all made up. Prim is at home." I say, some part of me knows the words won't reach her, but if this was the only thing I could do then I would do it. I lay my palms up against the invisible wall, showing her in someway that there was a wall there. "I love you, Katniss. Stay strong for me."

I don't care that Johanna hears me say this. She looks almost as worried for Finnick as I do for Katniss. I look at her for a second, "They're using Annie against him. He tried so hard. They found out, they always do." She doesn't say this directly to me, more to herself. More as thoughts that needed to be said than anything.

Katniss and Finnick begin to run towards us, they have not figured out that a wall sits between us. They run full force into the wall, Finnick got it bad as blood begins to flow endlessly out of his nose. Katniss looks broken, her face tortured. I had a feeling there was more than just Prim screaming now; they could have her whole family screaming a horrible nightmare into her ears.

I want to hold her, and I don't want to wait an hour to do that. I try to plunge my knife into it, but the pointy tip doesn't even make a dent. Johanna tries the same with her ax, but it just bounces away. It was made evident after seconds of trying this that we would just have to wait.

I drop my knife onto the ground and place my hand against the wall hoping that maybe my love will break it and if it doesn't at least Katniss would know I was here. She places her hand on the same place mine lays. We could be touching if the wall wasn't there. I look into her eyes as I see her slowly falling to pieces in front of me. Katniss had seen enough pain in her family, she was ready to put all the pain on her and have them feel it no longer.

Her family feeling pain was pain inflicted on her as well. Her feeling pain was pain inflicted on me. No I cannot hear the screams of my loved ones, but I see scars forming in her eyes and my heart feels heavy. I feel tortured, as I'm sure she does now. But most of all I feel lost, with her feeling like this; I'm not sure what to do.

"Katniss, stay strong. I love you; I have loved you for so long. The things you are hearing they aren't real. They can't be real. Stay strong. I'm here, right here." I know she can't hear me, I know she can't feel my heart beating with hers, but she knows that I am here, maybe that will help her.

Katniss turns away from me and I see the mutts before she starts sending arrows through them. Jabberjays, one half of Mockingjays, they made something beautiful, but in the end they were just like their creators. Nasty, evil, disgusting, inhumane.

Katniss looks strong for a couple minutes as she tries to kill the what seems like hundreds of them in the trees, but then she gives up and hunches over just as Finnick has done. It hurts; it hurts a lot to see her like this. I sit with both my hands against the glass waiting for this horrid hour to finish.

When it does and the wall is gone, I instantly wrap my arms around Katniss. Her face is tear stained and she looks long gone. I never thought the Capitol could hurt us even more. I was completely wrong.

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**I hope you liked it. I was really excited to write this part so I hope I did it justice. Tell me if you liked it? Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	66. Chapter 66

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 66**

Katniss doesn't say anything as she lies in my arms. I feel, as I rock her back and forth, that somehow I'm piecing her back together. Her body trembles, but she's with me. When it came to her and me, being in each other's presence helped a lot.

_"It's all right, Katniss,"_ I whisper into her ear, as she stays wrapped in my arms. I have blocked out everything else. I don't hear Finnick or Johanna or Beetee, right now it's just Katniss and I trying to hold each other together.

"_You didn't hear them,"_ She says, refusing to believe that her family was really at home, watching this in front of their small television, praying that she'll make it back home again.

"_I heard Prim. Right in the beginning. But it wasn't her,"_ I say, I hope she gets this. I hope she gets that it comes right from the evil minds of the Gamemakers, "_It was a jabberjay." _I reassure her.

"_It was her. Somewhere. The jabberjay had just recorded it." _She says, her protective mind taking over. She was right, jabberjay's recorded things and repeated what they heard, but I don't think the Gamemakers would do that. I don't think the public would stand for killing off the tributes and then physically hurting their loved ones in the process to cause more pain to them.

"_No, that's what they want you to think. The same way I wondered if Glimmer's eyes were in that mutt last year. But those weren't Glimmer's eyes. And that wasn't Prim's voice. Or if it was, they took it from an interview or something and distorted the sound. Made it say whatever she was saying." _I say. The Capitol was nasty like that, and Katniss knew that as well as the next person, but right now she refuses to believe it. Her body keeps on trembling. I can only imagine what is going through her head right now.

"_No, they were torturing her. She's probably dead." _Katniss wasn't one to jump to conclusions; she would think something through before fully believing it. Yet, here she was giving into what the Capitol wanted her to believe. Her guard is down, if we were to be attacked right now, I doubt she'd even remember how to hold the bow.

"_Katniss, Prim isn't dead. How could they kill Prim? We're almost down to the final eight of us. And what happens then?" _I pull her closer to me, I feel as if we might be here for a while. And if that's what it takes then I'm fine with that, as long as Katniss is fine by the end of it.

"_Seven more of us die." _She says and it's true, the cold-blooded truth, but that wasn't what I was getting at.

"_No, back home. What happens when they reach the final eight tributes in the Games?"_ I lift her face into mine, her grey eyes are still bright, but they don't shine like they usually do. "_What happens? At the final eight?" _

_ "At the final eight? They interview your family and friends back home." _She says, little hope entering her voice.

"_That's right. They interview your family and friends. And can they do that if they've killed them all?" _I beg the question, and her eyes brighten just a little bit.

"_No?"_ She's unsure of the answer because she still wants to believe the trick that the Gamemakers had pulled over on her.

"_No. That's how we know Prim's alive. She'll be the first one they interview won't she?" _I ask. Prim was known throughout the country. She was the girl Katniss had volunteered for, the girl Katniss had vowed to win for. The country loved Prim. They couldn't just kill her. "_First Prim. Then your mother. Your cousin, Gale. Madge._" She begins to straighten up, and her tears seem to subside, just a little. "_It was a trick, Katniss. A horrible one. But we're the only ones who can be hurt by it. We're the ones in the Games. Not them." _I say.

"_You really believe that?" _She asks. The question could mean so much more. It could bring so many more thoughts. Did I believe that the tributes were the only ones harmed by the Games? No of course not. The pain that the Games caused me reflected evenly on Marcus. And I'm sure that if Katniss were to die, Mrs. Everdeen would go right back into the depression that she had left only years ago. The Games hurt every single person in one way or another, but that's not what she was asking.

"_I really do,"_ I answer. Because in all honesty I know that the Gamemakers would not physically harm those not in the Games, they could do it emotionally, but physically was crossing some sick sadistic line.

"_Do you believe it Finnick?"_ Katniss lifts her head with her own strength and looks to Finnick, who seems to have been soothing himself with my words as well.

"_It could be true. I don't know." _He looks away from us to Beetee. "_Could they do that Beetee? Take someone's regular voice and make it …" _His voice trails off. This afternoon had caused him great pain too.

"_Oh, yes. It's not even that difficult, Finnick. Our children learn a similar technique in school." _Says Beetee, his knowledge reassuring all of us more than my words ever could.

"_Of course Peeta's right. The whole country adores Katniss's little sister. If they really killed her like this, they'd probably have an uprising on their hands," _Johanna confirms my thoughts, "_Don't want that, do they?" _She turns and throws her head up, she's no longer talking to us anymore, but the Gamemakers, and probably President Snow himself, "_Whole country in rebellion? Wouldn't want anything like that!"_

She was crossing a thin line with upsetting the Gamemakers. If you embarrassed them just one bit, you were as good as dead. I had experienced it first hand. I imagine they have cut away from us now, watching the other tributes that aren't ranting about the evil Gamemakers. But the thing is, they should have kept it on us, because the country needs to hear this.

They need to rise.

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**I hope you liked it! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	67. Chapter 67

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 67**

Everyone breaks apart to do something different after Johanna goes on her ranting spree to the Gamemakers. Katniss stays in my arms and since both of us have nothing to do, I welcome it.

"_Who'd they use against Finnick?" _I ask knowing the answer, but I just wanted to make sure.

"_Somebody named Annie." _That was the difference between Katniss and I. She did not pay attention to details. I had retained information while watching the tapes, and obviously she had not.

"_Must be Annie Cresta," _I say. I imagine the poor sick girl back in District Four, waiting for the guy that keeps her sane to come back home.

"_Who?"_ Katniss asks me.

"_Annie Cresta. She was the girl Mags volunteered for. She won about five years ago." _I say. I had vaguely remembered watching her Games the first times. I never retained much information about the Games each year, it never was a good thing to remember. Watching children die as you're a child yourself isn't something someone gets excited for.

"_I don't remember those Games much. Was that the earthquake year?" _Katniss asks. Her voice sounds much better than what it was only twenty minutes ago.

"_Yeah. Annie's the one who went mad when her district partner got beheaded. Ran off by herself and hid. But an earthquake broke a dam and most of the arena got flooded. She won because she was the best swimmer."_ I say, remembering re-watching those Games only weeks ago. She had something different in her, not because she was crazy, but because she was determined to get home.

"_Did she get better after? I mean, her mind?" _Asks Katniss. The girl walking up to the stage before Mags volunteered did not look better, she still was crazy, but Finnick was there to hold her together.

"_I don't know. I don't remember ever seeing her at the Games again. But she didn't seem too stable during the reaping this year." _I say. It might seem a little weird if I had read into so much stuff, so I don't tell Katniss all that I have figured out.

Out of nowhere we all hear the sound of the unsettling cannon. Out to the beach we all go to find a hovercraft picking up pieces of a tribute that could have been alive only seconds ago. What ever came out in that time slot I did not want to meet. I walk over to the new map that I had created, marking where the jabberjays are and then simply beast in the next time slot.

The rest of the day I spend on the beach, watching Katniss swim through the water with easy precision, feeling the sun against my skin, taking in my last moments with Katniss. When the anthem plays we find out that we are now down to the final eight, so close. Katniss will be home within days, if people keep dying the way they are.

"_They're really burning through us," _says Johanna, and that was the scary thing. Katniss could run into a beast in the jungle and she could be dead, she hadn't won yet.

"_Who's left? Besides us five and District Two?"_ asks Finnick.

"_Chaff." _I answer without a thought. I never had trouble keeping track and he was Haymitch's friend, I should probably keep a tab on him.

A parachute fly's down as I say this. I smell bread, but it's not the stuff from home. They are small squares, the bread from District Three. My dad had tried it out once, but they didn't sell very well so he never made them again.

"_These are from your district, right, Beetee?"_ I ask just to make sure.

_"Yes, from District Three. How many are there?"_ He asks, not at all thankful that his District had probably sent these to him. Something seemed weird about how adamant he was about the number of them. I push it away as hunger though, maybe he didn't want to have to share a bunch. Finnick is over dramatic in counting it as well. Like if he miss counts it, there will be dire consequences. It was the same way he had looked at the bread from District Four earlier. It might mean something. Maybe I'm just reading into things a little too much.

_"Twenty four." _says Finnick.

"_An even two dozen then?"_ Asks Beetee.

_"Twenty-four on the nose."_ It seems strange they'd send us such a weird number of rolls when there is five of us. We can't divide it up evenly. "_How should we divide them?" _Finnick asks.

"_Let's each have three, and whoever is still alive at breakfast can take a vote on the rest." _I know Johanna says this to release tension, but it was completely and honestly true. Who knew how many would no longer be breathing by the morning? We all split the rolls, eating them easily.  
We stand in the jungle with our supplies as the giant wave floods the beach. Then we go down and make camp, we should be safe the whole night. We do hear sound coming from the eleven o'clock space that sounds like flesh eating insects, all of us knew not to go in there.

By the time the moon has come up I see the day has worn on a lot of people. I'm not tired and I figure now is a good time as ever to talk Katniss into living instead of dying for me. I feel the locket against my neck, I can only hope she'll listen. If she does, she could be home and safe within days.

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**I hope you liked it! Sorry it was so short, but my next chapter is one of my favorite parts in the whole series, but it's one of many parts. So I hope I can do it justice. Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	68. Chapter 68

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics. **

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**Ch. 68**

Katniss has her head against mine. I gently caress her hair. If I close my eyes I can imagine a fire before us, in our own house back in District Twelve. I can imagine that there are no Hunger Games and that we were never put in them. I can imagine that we fell in love the normal way, that we met in school and that we knew instantly. I can imagine that we have just put the kids to bed after a long day. I can imagine that my brothers live real close by and that Prim is happy and that Gale found someone else.

This world I imagine with my eyes closed is all I could ever wished for. If someone were to ask me before I went in the Games what I would want my life to be I would give them that exact answer. In that life I wouldn't have nightmares following me each night, or a death threat always replaying in my head, or the worrying about one of my loved ones getting reaped. In that life I could be happy.

Then I open my eyes and if I keep my eyes trained forward I can imagine we sit on the beaches in District Four, during a much-needed vacation. I can imagine that we didn't have to go back in and that we were safe.

But then I turn my eyes and the dark jungle looms behind me. It's foreign and in all words scary and things I don't even know what to call come playing in there. People die in there. I might loose my life in there. Katniss went temporarily crazy in there. This is something I could not imagine, for it was real. It wasn't some nightmare my mind had made up, or a daydream gone wrong, it was my life.

I feel Katniss sigh into my shoulder. At least she was still here. At least her heart kept beating when I felt mine could not.

I will myself to think of the end. It's something I could do last year, when we both could go home, but this year there is no possibility of that. She won't be able to kill me just like last year and we'll be down to the same dilemma. I needed her to stay alive. I needed her to realize that there was life for her with out me in it. After all she had already done that for sixteen years.

"_Katniss," _I speak quietly, as to not wake the others. But really in the back of my mind I know I do it so the Capitol can't hear. There is no doubt they are listening with wide-open ears to this conversation with the Star-crossed Lovers from District Twelve.

"_It's not use pretending we don't know what the other one is trying to do." _I say, I feel her move a little bit; she wasn't ready for this conversation. But if we waited for that then it would never happen. "_I don't know what kind of deal you think you made with Haymitch, but you should know he made me promises as well. So I think we can assume he was lying to one us." _I refrain from saying he was lying to her because when it came down to it, neither of us could really know what Haymitch's intentions were.

She lifts her eyes to mine, they still look damaged from the jabberjays earlier, but now they look worried about what I just said. "_Why are you saying this now?" _

_ "Because I don't want you forgetting how different our circumstances are. If you die, and I live, there's no life for me at all back in District Twelve. You're my whole life." _She had been since the day I first saw her. Beautiful and innocent, she stole my heart. "_It's different for you. I'm not saying it wouldn't be hard. But there are other people who'd make your life worth living." _

I feel the cold locket against my neck, the other people that kept Katniss breathing sat smiling in it. I pull it out and hang it in the moonlight. A mockingjay is on it, strong and proud like Katniss and inside the people that made her who she was. I open it. The pictures are good ones, her mother and Prim look joyful as they laugh and Gale has a smile across his face. I could see in her eyes that she knew what it stood for; that I meant it for a better life, not a perfect one, but one worth living.

"_You're family needs you, Katniss." _I say, softly hoping she gets it. These people that had pictures in this locket needed Katniss and Katniss needed them. She shouldn't die for me, not with these three people waiting back home, waiting for their daughter, sister, and friend, to come home.

I let her take it in, their happy faces, my wish for her to have a better life, and the knowledge that life with out me might be okay. And then ever so softly I say it again, "_No one really needs me." _I think it over again, about all the people that I had ever impacted. None of them, not one, needed me to survive.

Then Katniss, who looks troubled and lost, looks up. Her eyes have tears in them that have not yet fallen and I just want to hold her and never let go. But all to soon the sun will rise, the day will begin, more people will die, and soon we'll be separated from each other. Just the way fate had been telling us to be for a while.

"_I do," _she says, her voice shaky, but full of the love we had for each other, "_I need you." _It was true. We needed each other. That happened to people after almost dying together, but it's not possible. The world had told us time and time again, and now finally we couldn't fight back anymore.

But before I can speak one more word Katniss's lips are against mine. And that's how I know, how I'm sure that when Katniss told me last year it was all for the Games she was lying. The way her lips work against mine and yearn for mine and the way mine kiss back, are way too perfect for there not to be love.

With the kisses I forget everything. I forget being reaped, I forget telling the world about my love for Katniss, I forget the cave and the sorrow it held, I forget the last moments of Cato, I forget Katniss smashing my heart, I forget the months without her, I forget the endless nightmares, the forgotten tributes, all the unsettling cannons I've heard, being shipped back, being before the Cornucopia again, watching people die. I forget everything and just let these last moments with Katniss take me away from this world.

For once, I let myself believe that everything is perfect.

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**I hope you liked it! Like I said at the end of the last chapter I really hope I did this part justice because it is one of my favorite parts in the whole trilogy. Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	69. Chapter 69

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics. **

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**Ch. 69**

Finnick wakes up and finds Katniss and I in each other's arms. He wants us to go to sleep, but I'm not tired. Katniss looks tired though, so I say, "_It's too dangerous. I'm not tired. You lie down, Katniss." _

I walk her over to where the others sleep. I place the golden locket around her neck to remind her there were people back home that needed her. And then when she's lying down I place my hand on her stomach where our invisible child lays. I wish this child were real, that maybe some part of me could be with her forever.

"_You're going to make a great mother, you know." _I say to her, and it's not just for the audience. It's for her to know that I think she will be able to actually become a mother. Sure it won't be my child, but at least she could have a family, be happy.

I kiss her one last time for good measure and head back to Finnick.

At first it's just silence between Finnick and I. All that we had to listen to was the peaceful breathing of the others and the sounds of the calm waters. But then Finnick turns to me. He looks at me for what seems like forever before he says, "We're all fighting for something, aren't we?"

I take a while before I answer, because the answer was so simple. The question could have even been rhetorical, but after I think about it, it's so much more than that. If I just extend it out of the arena and think of the whole country, everybody has something to fight for. He wasn't just talking about the arena, and maybe just maybe he was talking about the revolution.

"Yeah, but everyone's reason is the best reason." I try to think of it, me fighting for Katniss, Finnick fighting to get back to Annie, Johanna fighting for life, they all were good reasons to fight for and none were better than the other. And then there was President Snow, his reasons were evil and against moral code, but they were reasons, and to him they were the best reasons.

Finnick doesn't say anything else; instead he looks out into the water, probably thinking of home. And his sick lover waiting for him.

"I know you love her. It's obvious. And I know you're doing everything in your power to keep her alive, but…" His sentence ends, an unfinished thought that I'll never get to hear. I almost ask him about Annie, but I know it won't be popular with the Capitol. I hold my tongue.

The rest of the night is spent in silence, there really is nothing else to talk about it. Our deaths are near and close and we can't find anything good enough to say out loud. I think I would really like Finnick if I could take the time to know him. He was so much more than what the Capitol had portrayed him to be, and that was a shame.

We are sent another twenty-four rolls from District Three. I know there's something about them because they count them the same way they did last night. There is some message our mentors are sending us and Katniss and I have no clue what it is. And the thing is I have no way to figure it out. If Katniss and I were supposed to know, I guess they would have told us. Maybe I can figure it out before I die.

Once we each get three rolls again Katniss and I eat them together in the sand. Katniss avoids my eyes and I avoid hers. After last night it all seems different. We both knew we would die for each other, but had we actually said it out loud?

Later Katniss pulls me into the water to teach me how to swim. I don't see the point, after all at the rate things are going I could be dead by tonight, but at least I could spend time with her. She doesn't speak much as she teaches me. Only shows me how and then watches me do it.

I see the appeal of swimming. The water doesn't scare me as much as it did when we had just entered the arena.

After awhile she stops me, "Look Peeta, the sand rubs off the scabs." She works the sand up and down her arm and then removes it. There is now no sign that the fog had plagued her there. I start to do the same, it feels nice against my skin.

Then ever so quietly Katniss speaks, "_Look, the pool is down to eight. I think it's time we took off." _

I nod, but think before I speak. On one hand they are planning something that we don't know about, that is certain. But it doesn't totally mean that their plan is against us. It's probably against the tributes from Two, and that's why Beetee wanted his wire so badly. Also if we're with them we have more protection and they most likely won't try to kill us when Brutus and Enobaria are still alive. It's the safest to stay with them and Katniss and I need safe as long as we can have it.

"_Let's stick around until Brutus and Enobaria are dead. I think Beetee's trying to put together some kind of trap for them now. Then, I promise, we'll go." _I say. But the promise is weary, because if it comes down to Katniss and I again, she will not have the guts to kill me. If some one else does the job it will be much easier. I guess I'll have to cross that bridge when we come to it.

"_All right." _Katniss answers, reluctantly, "_We'll stay until the Careers are dead. But that's the end of it." _She turns away from me and waves Finnick over.

This might very well be the longest and last day of my life.

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**I hope you liked it! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out. ~boywithbreadlover**


	70. Chapter 70

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics. **

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**Ch. 70**

I was right about Beetee planning to set a trap for Brutus and Enobaria. A plan was made. We attach Beetee's wire to the tree that the lightning strikes before midnight and set in the water. With out a doubt with out us on the beach the two will come out and try and catch some fish. But when the lightning strikes it will electrocute them and they will be out of our way. Or if they aren't in the water all the food will be fried and they'll die of starvation before we do.

But when that happens Katniss will want to leave our allies. It will be as soon as tonight actually. I'm not sure if we're ready for it.

When we finish making our plan we decide to go check out the tree. It's quite a hike and Finnick and I have to carry Beetee because he doesn't have the strength to make the steady incline by himself.

At the tree we each take jobs. I become the gatherer. I walk around the area and look for nuts and Katniss hunts. Beetee examines the tree with a careful eye.

Katniss and I sit down next to each other and roast nuts and pieces of rat meat as we wait for Beetee to tell us what he has found out. When we hear the sector next to us come alive with whatever creature was in there we decide it's best to move.

We wait for the lightning to strike. Katniss watches it from a tree and when she comes back down she makes a report to Beetee. That apparently was all the information he needed and so we go back to the beach.

We get the rest of the day, until we go back to the tree, off. We each take naps and sit in the sand, and if we weren't in the Games it might have been nice. And when we realize that after tonight there won't be anymore seafood we decide to have sort of party. Though it wasn't much to celebrate. After all this very well might be my last meal. I shiver as I realize this.

This might be the last time I see the sun, or see the rare smile of Katniss, or feel the cold wind on my cheek. My last moments were before me and I felt horrible.

Even with this feeling in my body I decide I should enjoy it. I help find food for our feast. I spear fish and gather oysters and Finnick and Katniss dive for oysters. I wish I were a good enough swimmer to do this because Katniss's face was in awe every time she came up from a dive.

Later once we decide all the food we have is more than enough, Katniss, Finnick, and I begin to clean the food. When I'm prying open one of the oysters I find a pearl sitting in one. Perfect and beautiful, in every way it reminded me of Katniss. And also vaguely in my mind I remembered Effie telling us that coal turned into these lovely little things. It's almost an inside joke between Katniss and I.

"_You know, if you put enough pressure on coal it turns to pearls."_ I say directly to Finnick only to hear Katniss's bright laugh because it might be the last time I ever get to hear it.

"_No, it doesn't." _Finnick says, looking at me as if I'm stupid, but I don't care because I get that laugh. One of the only things that can make me feel good on a bad day or bring me instantly out of my nightmares. It was an absolutely breathtaking laugh.

I rinse the pearl off so it's shiny and white, something Katniss can keep forever. And maybe someday way in the future one of her kids will ask her about and she'll tell them about me and they'll know I was very important to their mother. " _For you." _

She takes it, but reluctantly. Her eyes faltering over my face before she fully accepts it. Something bothers her. Something in her eyes tells me that things aren't really quite right. And things aren't, but it's something more than just the Games.

"_Thank you." _She says, her voice more sorrowful than it should be.

I don't smile anymore because she doesn't. Her eyes bore into mine. Her promise. She had made one too. Katniss Everdeen didn't go back on her promises. But that's the thing, neither did I. Katniss didn't care that others were waiting at home for her or that by her dying Prim probably will too. She doesn't care. She promised to herself that I would make it out alive.

"_The locket didn't work, did it?" _I ask. I feel, just a little bit, like we're back outside the train on the tracks. Katniss breaking my heart all over again. It didn't matter that Finnick stood feet away or that we were in the Games. Katniss knew how to make me feel horrible and powerless. I don't think she did it on purpose, it's only who she was. But I wish for once she would just listen to me.

She stands still and doesn't answer. "_Katniss?"_ I urge her. I urge her to tell me why she looks so conflicted. Even if I knew what the answer was.

"_It worked." _Her words are emotionless, her face as well. If things went her way, I wouldn't be the one dying, she would. But for once things can't go her way.

"_Just not the way I wanted it to," _I look away from her, because what was the point of fighting? I wouldn't change her mind. Katniss was set in her ways. It would take hours of convincing, fighting, pleading and maybe then Katniss would change. Maybe then she would stay alive for me. But if that's not they way she wants it, then fine. It was going my way anyways.

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**I hope you liked it! Sorry I haven't posted in a while and the last chapter wasn't my best. I really liked this one though, so tell what you thought about it? I'm almost done with this! I can't believe it! I'll be taking a small break when I finish, I'll give you the first chapter of Jabberjay before I do though, cause I don't want to leave you wondering! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	71. Chapter 71

**Here's the next chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 71**

We eat a lot waiting for the sky to darken. I'm not even sure I want the sky to darken. If I could pause time and make it so this arena didn't work the way it should work then everything would be fine. But there is no way to stop time, I had wished for it before. So the sky does darken and the anthem plays and when we're three hours away from the lightning we start our trek.

We're all weighed down by the food we had just eaten. It wasn't that great of an idea, but when we had the food why not eat it? Once we get to the tree Beetee begins to work the wire around the tree. And when he's done with that he turns around and looks to us.

"Now I'd like Katniss and Johanna to uncoil the wire going down to the water. Take it carefully. Once you get to the water drop the wire and the spool way into it with whatever wire is left on it. Once that is done run quickly. If you two are fast enough you will make it to safety." He says.

I don't like the plan one bit; Katniss could die. We all know Johanna and her aren't the best of friends, if they get in a fight one of them is sure to be dead. If I could go along I could stop any fights and protect Katniss from any other dangers. If Katniss was going, I was going. Everybody knew that.

"_I want to go with them as guard." _I let almost exactly after Beetee says his last word.

"_You're too slow." _Beetee lets out just as fast as if he knew I would say that, "_Besides, I'll need you on this end. Katniss will guard. There's no time to debate this," _He says firmly and he's got me there because if they get down there and not have enough time to get out then they were both dead. Looks as if I'm staying here, and I can't help but think this is part of some plan Katniss and I don't know about.

I must look worried, as worried as Katniss does because she looks at me with saddened eyes. One of us might die tonight and I hope with all my heart that it's me. "_It's okay. We'll just drop the coil and come straight back up." _She says trying to reassure both her and me.

"_Not in the lightning zone. Head for the tree in the one-to-two-o'clock sector. If you find you're running out of time, move over one more. Don't even think about going back on the beach, though, until I can assess the damage." _Says Beetee.

Katniss grabs my face, I'm worried, more worried than I've ever been, "_Don't worry. I'll see you at midnight." _One kiss that's all I get and she's gone too soon. I want to believe her. I want to know in my brain that I will see her again, but nothing is ever certain in the Games. That might be the very last kiss I ever get from the beautiful Katniss Everdeen. I keep my eyes locked on her until she's lost in the crowded jungle. The love of my life was walking away from me and all I could do was stand and watch her do it.

"Peeta," I look away from the dense forest to Finnick, "It will all be fine. Trust me on this one." No, it will not be fine. I'm going to lose my life in here and if my plan went through so would Finnick. It would not all be fine and I couldn't trust him on this.

"I don't know about fine Finnick, but you boys better be ready for a fight if the others find us." Says Beetee who still looks at the tree even after observing it for hours. "And Peeta may I have your knife?" I hand it to him and look away down the forest trying my hardest to make out figures. It isn't until I hear a loud slice that I look back.

"Beetee what are you doing? The wire has to be together, everything Katniss is doing is for nothing now! You're putting in her danger!" It takes me a minute to realize that I should run after Katniss and not yell at Beetee. Whatever he was doing was not the original plan. I have another knife I don't need the one Beetee has for protection so I turn and run.

It's hard running at a fast pace down the steep hill and when I trip I'm not surprised. I fall hard on the ground and know that if I make it past tonight I will have bruises in the morning.

"Peeta?" I turn around to see Chaff a knife poised above his head ready to kill.

"Chaff. Long time no see." But that's all I get to say before blood spews out of his mouth and he falls to the ground a spear sticking out of his back, Brutus stands behind him.

He lunges towards me, but he only has a knife the size I have and does not have time to get the spear from Chaff's back. I wait for the cannon, but it doesn't come. Chaff is still alive, but dying quickly. I plunge the knife into Brutus's heart and he stops fighting because he knows he's dead. And that's when I hear her. She's in pain, but she's fighting. She's trying to find me.

I hear the cannon, both of them within seconds of each other, if you didn't know you'd think they were one. I try to run towards her, but I realize Brutus did get a cut on me, across my stomach and it slows me down. I don't hear her anymore. I try her name a couple times, but she doesn't answer back.

The boom is loud, louder than a cannon. No one has died and it isn't until I look into the sky that I realize that something bigger has been blown up. The force field, the one thing that held us in here, is exploding, disappearing and before I can say anything I'm captured in a net.

"Katniss! Katniss!" I yell, but it doesn't help and once I'm in the hovercraft a cold needle goes into my skin and I'm asleep in seconds.

I wonder if this is what death feels like.

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**I hope you liked it! One more chapter! Wow! It will be up really soon and then I'll post the first one to Jabberjay! Thanks come on the next chapter! Wow! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


	72. Chapter 72

**Here's the last chapter! Enjoy! I do not own Catching Fire, any direct quotes will be in italics.**

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**Ch. 72**

"Peeta Mellark." The words slip out of President Snow's mouth like a snake. I'm not sure how long it's been since I was out of the arena, but I'm in the same room I was after the last games. White and small, the feelings I had in it last year were not the same. I had just woke up hours ago and the cut that Brutus had given me was gone. The bruises I knew I would have from falling weren't there. And Katniss, Katniss wasn't here. I knew it, the nurse had told me, seconds ago.

Where Katniss is, the nurse hadn't told me. I had no clue where she was and it made me sick to my stomach. She could be dead, gone, away from this world. My heart is still beating, my lungs are still breathing, but in my mind I am dead.

When President Snow walked into the room the smell of blood and roses entered as well. It wasn't a pleasant smell and I didn't know how people could stand to be around him for longer than a minute. He had only entered seconds ago and I already wanted the coward out.

I stare straight ahead at the door, escape would be hard, but I had been through the Games twice, I'm sure I could do it. I wonder what it's like out there in the Capitol right now. Are people losing trust in their marvelous president? I sure hope so.

"It seems you're still alive." He says. A snake, poised to attack, getting people with fear and not strength.

"It seems you are too." I answer back, still looking straight ahead. I wish I could kill him right now.

"Funny joke, Mr. Mellark. Have you heard of your District?" He asks. Of course I haven't heard of my District I just woke up. I had no clue about my District, but the way he said it, something bad had happened. But I didn't care anymore I just wanted to know where Katniss was. I stay silent.

"Well it seems you don't care." He pauses and looks around the small room before he sits. "Tell me Mr. Mellark, what do you know of District Thirteen." District Thirteen was gone, all gone, blown up ages ago. Everyone knew that and if you wanted to forget you couldn't because it was shown on the television every single day.

"That you killed them." I spit out, still not turning my head to look at the sick monster.

"Oh Mr. Mellark, I was only a young boy when the first revolution happened. But no, not even the people before killed them. We made a deal. I don't know why they didn't kill them. Pity is a horrible thing to have." His words sicken me and what did they mean? District Thirteen was still alive? Is that what he was telling me?

"District Thirteen is still alive?" I ask, still not turning my head, I couldn't find it in me to do it.

"Yes, it's where your wife and child are. But of course you do not have a child and she isn't your wife. You really got the people though." He says. Is that what sickened me the most about him? That he could see right through me. That every little lie I told to get people to believe me he knew the truth. I swallow hard. I would get him someday. He would die.

"Katniss is there?" Now and only now do I turn my head because we were talking about Katniss and if she was still alive then I could find it in me somewhere to look this snake in his eyes.

"Yes, they want to wage war against us." He laughs, as if he has an inside joke with himself, "But we don't want that do we, Peeta?" He stands, "You have an interview with Caesar tomorrow, if you want Katniss back safely, make them stop the war." His words were firm and before I could say much else he was out the door.

He knew how to make me do things, use Katniss against me. Because deep down in my heart of hearts I wanted them to wage war against the Capitol. And also deep down I knew if they did Katniss would be dead within minutes at the hand of Snow. I gulp hard again. I had to use my words to stop the war. I could do this, I knew I could and once I got Katniss back safely we could start the war all over again.

The lights go dark and the television turns on. It takes me seconds to realize I'm staring at my District and minutes to realize they're being bombed. I watch as the place I grew up in is destroyed and I see all the people running only to be caught by an explosion. The tear meets my cheek before I can stop it. My District was dead and my heart would be too if I didn't stop this war.

They make me watch the bombing for fifteen minutes and then the nurse that was there when I woke up walks in.

"Where's my family?" I yell at her. She doesn't not respond. I try to lift up my arms, but they're restrained. "Where's my family?" I try again. Again she does not speak. I try over and over and over again and she never speaks. My family was not supposed to be harmed. I knew they were going to be safe once I was gone. But they aren't and they might be dead and the nurse leaves and I still do not have an answer.

I still yell it when she is gone. I still yell it when I begin to feel tired. I know they are watching me. I know they are probably laughing at me. And I don't feel good at all until I see Portia walk in that door her cheeks tearstained as well, that's when I stop yelling. That's when her tears become more and mine become less.

"They took Cinna." She sobs and falls into my chest. It would have been much better if I had died in that arena. I feel envy for the people lucky enough to be out of this world. But since I was here and they were taking everything I had ever loved, I could at least try and get Katniss back.

I'll have to be at me best in that interview tomorrow or I won't have anything to live for at all.

**End of Book Two**

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**I hope you liked it! Wow it's over! I'd like to thank Suzanne Collins of course for writing such an amazing story, and characters, that I fell in love with. Second of all I'd like to thank my marvelous readers that stuck with me, even in these last weeks when I didn't post everyday. I'd like to thank the people that reviewed, even if it was only once, because your reviews make me happy! You guys are amazing and if you were with me on The Fate Games and stayed with me on this you are amazing! And if you've just gone on the Rekindled Fire journey with me then you are amazing as well! OKay for other news, Jabberjay will be up in a few hours with the first chapter! I will be taking a mini break where I won't post much for two weeks, but you might get some every so often! Don't forget to REVIEW on the way out! Thanks! ~boywithbreadlover**


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